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Hits! Skits! And Jingles! (Raw)

Item metadata
Speaker:
ns1:collection
Primary Fiction and Poetry Texts
Word Count :
35870
ns1:location
Sydney, Australia
Contributor:
Goodge, W. T. (1862-1909)
Created:
1899
Identifier
goohits.xml
part of:
Publisher
University of Sydney Library
Title
Hits! Skits! And Jingles!
Document metadata
Extent:
493521
Identifier
goohits-raw.txt
Title
goohits#Raw
Type
Raw

goohits-raw.txt — 481 KB

File contents

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		<title type="main" TEIform="title">Hits! Skits! And Jingles!</title>
		<author TEIform="author">Goodge, W. T. (1862-1909)</author>
		<respStmt TEIform="respStmt">
			<resp TEIform="resp">Electronic Text:</resp><name TEIform="name">LaserWords</name></respStmt>
			<funder TEIform="funder">Australian Literature Electronic Gateway</funder>
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	<extent TEIform="extent">ca. 324 KB</extent>
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		<publisher TEIform="publisher">University of Sydney Library</publisher>
		<pubPlace TEIform="pubPlace">Sydney, Australia</pubPlace><date TEIform="date">2003</date>
		<idno type="setis" TEIform="idno">goohits</idno>
		<availability status="unknown" TEIform="availability"><p TEIform="p"><hi rend="bold" TEIform="hi">http://setis.library.usyd.edu.au/oztexts</hi></p>
		<p TEIform="p">© University of Sydney Library. The texts and images are not to be used for commercial purposes without permission</p></availability>

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		<p TEIform="p">Prepared from the print edition published by The Bulletin Newspaper Company, Limited Sydney 1904</p>
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	<creation TEIform="creation"><date TEIform="date">1899</date></creation>
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			<term TEIform="term">1890-1909</term>
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		<docTitle TEIform="docTitle">
			<titlePart type="main" TEIform="titlePart">Hits! Skits! And Jingles!</titlePart>
			<titlePart type="sub" TEIform="titlePart"/>
		</docTitle>
		<byline TEIform="byline"><docAuthor TEIform="docAuthor">W. T. Goodge</docAuthor></byline>
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			<pubPlace TEIform="pubPlace">Sydney</pubPlace>
			<publisher TEIform="publisher">The Bulletin Newspaper Company, Limited</publisher>
			<docDate TEIform="docDate">1904</docDate>
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<div1 type="contents" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e131"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Contents</head>
<p TEIform="p">
<table TEIform="table" id="d64e137">
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell"/>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">PAGE</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE OOZLUM BIRD</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">1</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">WHY?</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">7</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE BABY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">7</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">DRIFTING DOWN THE DARLING</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">8</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">SOCIALISM AND ANARCHY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">9</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE ONLY BANK NOT TO BE ROBBED</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">10</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">HOW WE DROVE THE TROTTER</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">10</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">WHAT BOOTS IT?</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">12</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE FOOL WHO MEANS NO HARM</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">13</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">A LOVE SONG</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">14</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE MODERN WOMAN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">15</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">TO THE IMPRESSIONIST SCHOOL</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">15</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">TOWN AND COUNTRY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">16</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">ACTRESS AND ARTIST</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">16</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE LAY OF THE LOVELORN LARRIKIN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">17</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">WHO WROTE THE SHAKESPEARE PLAYS?</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">18</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">ON HIS OWN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">19</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">ODE TO MAORILAND</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">20</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">“SHOUTING”</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">21</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE FROG IN THE WELL</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">22</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">A BACK-BLOCK SETTLEMENT</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">23</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">A QUATRAIN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">24</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">TOBACCO!</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">25</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">TWO FOOLS</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">25</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE ROCKING-CHAIR</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">26</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THEY WENT TO LAW</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">27</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE DAFFODIL DANCE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">30</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">KEROSENE!</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">31</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE OLD DUTCH CLOCK</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">32</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE AUSTRALIAN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">34</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">HOW WE ALL LOOK AT IT</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">35</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">WHO STOLE THE PONIES?</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">36</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">STATION LIFE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">37</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">COME TO ORANGE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">38</cell>
</row>

<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">TWO MEN AND A MAID</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">39</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">KING WHISKEY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">40</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">HOW HE DYED</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">42</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">CHARACTER AND REPUTATION</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">42</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE SHEARER'S LIFE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">43</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE WAY OF IT</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">44</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE MELODIOUS BULLOCKY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">44</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE JUBILEE GIRL</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">45</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">PRAYING FOR RAIN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">46</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE BURGLAR'S SONG</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">46</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">CIVILIZATION</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">47</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">LIFE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">47</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE PHASES OF THE EGO</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">48</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">A BAD BREAK</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">48</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">JAMBEROORA FLAT</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">49</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">ODE TO THE FRYINGPAN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">50</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE BOGAN SCRUB</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">51</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">CHRISTMAS BELLS (A CAROL)</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">52</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">MEALY MARY ANN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">54</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">ALAS!</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">55</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE SIMPLE CHINESE PLAN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">56</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE POSTMAN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">57</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE SMALL BOY'S WHISTLE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">58</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE LOOMING INVASION</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">59</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">WHEN THE COMPS. ARE CALLIN'!</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">60</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE MORAL OF TRILBY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">61</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE SMITHVILLE TANDEM BIKE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">64</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">FAST!</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">65</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">CLAY AND CHINA</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">66</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE MAN AND THE PAPER</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">67</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">ALAS AND ALACKADAY!</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">68</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">WHAT DO YOU WANT?</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">69</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">OUR DOG JIM</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">70</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE MALONI EVOLUTION</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">71</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">TWO HYPOCRITES</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">72</cell>
</row>

<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">WHAT IS LUCK?</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">73</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">A GENUINE BUSH SONG</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">74</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE PENDULUM</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">76</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">OOZLEUM</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">77</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE MICKITY-MULGA FOOTBALL MATCH</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">78</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE OLDEN GOLDEN DAYS</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">81</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">ROMANCE AND REALITY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">83</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE CRUELLEST CUT</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">84</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">SCORCHING</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">85</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">WHEN MATILDA HANGS THE WASHING ON THE LINE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">86</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">ABU BEN MAHOMET</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">87</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">A GREAT PERFORMANCE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">89</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE FATE OF TATE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">90</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">DAN THE BULLOCKY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">91</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">SPRING, SWEET SPRING!</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">92</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">EXPLAINS IT</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">93</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE QUARTER-BACK</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">94</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE NEW CHUM AND THE 'POSSUM</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">95</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">LIP TIP CAT</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">95</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THREE ROSES</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">96</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">WATER ON THE BRAIN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">97</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">“98”</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">98</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">DEAD SEA FRUIT</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">99</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">QUAY!</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">100</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">BANDY PAT OF BLUE GUM FLAT</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">101</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">AUSTRALIA'S WISDOM</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">102</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE PHARISEE AND SADDUCEE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">103</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">FEDERATION</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">104</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">QUEEN WILHELMINA AND THE BICYCLE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">105</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">KATZENJAMMER</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">106</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE MONTH OF MAY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">107</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">LOVE AND THE CYCLES</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">108</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">RURAL POLITICS</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">109</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE GODLY JOHNSONS</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">110</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE MOSQUITO AND THE POLITICIAN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">112</cell>
</row>

<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell"/>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">PAGE</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">BUNDABAH</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">113</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">“—!” (THE GREAT AUSTRALIAN ADJECTIVE)</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">115</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">A SAD CASE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">116</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE POLITICIAN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">117</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE NEW ANATOMY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">118</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">WHEW!</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">119</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">WHY INDEED!</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">120</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">A DISMAL TALE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">121</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">ON PAPER</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">123</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE AVERAGE M.P.</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">124</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE BREATH OF SMELSON</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">125</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">SAME OLD STYLE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">126</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE INDIAN HAWKER</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">127</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE GIRL FOR US</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">128</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE LONG-BOW</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">129</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE POST OFFICE PEN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">130</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">SLIPPERY BILL</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">131</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">ON THE OLD BARCOO</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">133</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE LOAFER'S LAY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">135</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">ROOM AT THE TOP</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">136</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">OLD MAN CANOBOLAS</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">137</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">HUMAN NATURE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">138</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE OUT-OF-WORKS</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">139</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">HOME RULE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">140</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE WOMAN WHO DID N'T</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">141</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE DIFFERENCE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">142</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">AUSTRALIAN LITERATURE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">143</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">WHAT IT'S COMING TO</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">145</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE MINING MART</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">146</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE RURAL POLITICIANS</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">147</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE TRUTHFUL MAN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">149</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE GREAT AUSTRALIAN SLANGUAGE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">150</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">MAUD</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">152</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE USE OF DIPLOMACY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">153</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE BUSH MISSIONARY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">154</cell>
</row>

<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE SHEARERS' COOK</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">157</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE TUGS OF SIMPSONVILLE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">158</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">MULLIGAN'S SHANTY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">162</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">MCCULLOCH'S CHUMP</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">163</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">DALEY'S DORG WATTLE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">165</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">CHINAMAN LEE'S RECEIPT</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">166</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">MULGA FLAT</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">167</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">A MATTER OF KNACK</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">169</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE M'CAMLEY MIXTURE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">170</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">A SNAKE YARN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">172</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">PULLYERLEG!</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">173</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">FOOTBALL</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">175</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE GUILE OF DAD M'GINNIS</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">176</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">ALL SAME “PINAFORE”</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">177</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE SPIELERS AND THE GIRL</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">178</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE FOUR O'CLOCK BABY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">181</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE MAN WHO ALWAYS RUNS TO CATCH THE TRAM</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">182</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">HOW TO BECOME IMMORTAL</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">182</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">A BUNCH OF ROSES</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">183</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">ADVICE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">185</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">“MULGA AND WATTLE”</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">186</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">ONLY A MODERATE MANIA</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">187</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE WAY OF IT</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">188</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">BURNS AMENDED</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">188</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">“THE LITTLE BROWN EGOTIST”</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">189</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">THE MISSING MEAN MAN</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">191</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">INSOMNIA</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">192</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">A TIGHT PLACE</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">193</cell>
</row>
<row role="DATA" TEIform="row">
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">FINALLY</cell>
<cell role="data" rows="1" cols="1" TEIform="cell">197</cell>
</row>
</table>
</p>
</div1>
</front>
<body TEIform="body">
<div0 type="volume" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div0" id="d64e1701"><head type="div0" TEIform="head">Hits! Skits! And Jingles!</head>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e1705"><pb n="1" TEIform="pb" id="d64e1706"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Oozlum Bird.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">It was on the Diamantina</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the alligators grow,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And the natives' allegations</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Ain't particularly slow.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">He was old and he was ugly,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He was dirty, he was low;</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">He could lie like Ananias,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And they called him “Ginger Joe.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">He was wood-and-water joey</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">At the “Jackeroo's Retreat,”</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the swagmen and the shearers</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the bound'ry riders meet;</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And he'd pitch 'em lots of “fairies,”</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But the best I ever heard</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Was McPherson's trip to Sydney</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On the famous Oozlum Bird!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">“You can talk about yer racehorse</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the pace as he can go,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">But it just amounts to crawlin',</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Nothink else!” said Ginger Joe.</l></lg>
<pb n="2" TEIform="pb" id="d64e1775"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">“And these cycle blokes with pacers,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You can take my bloomin' word,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">They're a funeral procession</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To the blinded Oozlum Bird!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">“Do yez know Marengo station?</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">It's away beyond the Peak,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">Over sixty miles from Birdsville</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As you go to Cooper's Creek,</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">Which the blacks call Kallokoopah,</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And they tell you that Lake Eyre</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">Was one time an inland ocean.</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, the Oozlum Bird is there!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">“Bet yer boots it ain't no chicken,</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">It's as big and wide across</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">As the bird what beats the steamships,</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">What's it called? The albatross!</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">That's the bird! And old King Mulga</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Used to tell the boys and me</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">They were there when Central 'Stralia</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was a roarin' inland sea!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">“I was cook at old Marengo</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When McTavish had the run,</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">And his missus died and left him</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With a boy—the only one.</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">Jock McPherson was his nephew,</l>
<l n="46" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Lately came from Scotland, too,</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">Been sent out to get “experience”</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As a kind of Jackeroo!</l></lg>
<pb n="3" TEIform="pb" id="d64e1869"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="49" part="N" TEIform="l">“Well, this kid of old McTavish</l>
<l n="50" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was a daisy. Strike me blue!</l>
<l n="51" part="N" TEIform="l">There was nothing, that was mischief,</l>
<l n="52" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That the kiddy would n't do!</l>
<l n="53" part="N" TEIform="l">But he was a kindly kinchen</l>
<l n="54" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a reg'lar little brick,</l>
<l n="55" part="N" TEIform="l">And we all felt mighty sorry</l>
<l n="56" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When we heard that he was sick!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="57" part="N" TEIform="l">But, McTavish! Well, I reckon</l>
<l n="58" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">I</hi> am something on the swear,</l>
<l n="59" part="N" TEIform="l">But I never heard sich language</l>
<l n="60" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As McTavish uttered there;</l>
<l n="61" part="N" TEIform="l">For he cursed the blessed country,</l>
<l n="62" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the cattle and the sheep,</l>
<l n="63" part="N" TEIform="l">And the station-hands and shearers</l>
<l n="64" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Till yer blinded flesh would creep</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="65" part="N" TEIform="l">“It was something like a fever</l>
<l n="66" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That the little bloke had got,</l>
<l n="67" part="N" TEIform="l">And McTavish he remembered</l>
<l n="68" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(When he'd cursed and swore a lot),</l>
<l n="69" part="N" TEIform="l">That a chemist down in Sydney</l>
<l n="70" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Had a special kind of stuff</l>
<l n="71" part="N" TEIform="l">Which would cure the kiddy's fever</l>
<l n="72" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In a jiffy, right enough!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="73" part="N" TEIform="l">“So he sends me into Birdsville</l>
<l n="74" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On the fastest horse we had,</l>
<l n="75" part="N" TEIform="l">And I has to wire to Sydney</l>
<l n="76" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For the medsin for the lad.</l>
<pb n="4" TEIform="pb" id="d64e1965"/>
<l n="77" part="N" TEIform="l">They would send it by the railway,</l>
<l n="78" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And by special pack from Bourke;</l>
<l n="79" part="N" TEIform="l">It would take a week to do it</l>
<l n="80" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And be mighty slippery work.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="81" part="N" TEIform="l">“Well, I gallops into Birdsville</l>
<l n="82" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And I sends the wire all right;</l>
<l n="83" part="N" TEIform="l">And I looks around the township,</l>
<l n="84" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Meanin' stopping for the night.</l>
<l n="85" part="N" TEIform="l">I was waitin' in the bar-room—</l>
<l n="86" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">This same bar-room—for a drink</l>
<l n="87" part="N" TEIform="l">When a wire comes from McPherson,</l>
<l n="88" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And from Sydney! Strike me pink!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="89" part="N" TEIform="l">“I had left him at Marengo</l>
<l n="90" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On the morning of that day!</l>
<l n="91" part="N" TEIform="l">He was talking to McTavish</l>
<l n="92" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">At the time I came away!</l>
<l n="93" part="N" TEIform="l">And yet here's a wire from Sydney!</l>
<l n="94" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And it says: ‘Got here all right.</l>
<l n="95" part="N" TEIform="l">Got the medsin. Am just leaving.</l>
<l n="96" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Will be home again to-night!'</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="97" part="N" TEIform="l">“Well, I thought I had the jim-jams,</l>
<l n="98" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Yes, I did; for, spare me days!</l>
<l n="99" part="N" TEIform="l">How in thunder had McPherson</l>
<l n="100" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Got to Sydney, anyways?</l>
<l n="101" part="N" TEIform="l">But he'd got there, that was certain,</l>
<l n="102" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For the wire was plain and clear.</l>
<l n="103" part="N" TEIform="l">I could never guess conundrums,</l>
<l n="104" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">So I had another beer.</l></lg>
<pb n="5" TEIform="pb" id="d64e2059"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="105" part="N" TEIform="l">“In the morning, bright and early,</l>
<l n="106" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">I was out and saddled up,</l>
<l n="107" part="N" TEIform="l">And away to break the record</l>
<l n="108" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of old Carbine for the Cup.</l>
<l n="109" part="N" TEIform="l">And I made that cuddy gallop</l>
<l n="110" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As he'd never done before;</l>
<l n="111" part="N" TEIform="l">And, so-help-me-bob, McPherson</l>
<l n="112" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was there waiting at the door!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="113" part="N" TEIform="l">“And the kid was right as ninepence,</l>
<l n="114" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Sleepin' peaceful in his bunk,</l>
<l n="115" part="N" TEIform="l">And McTavish that delighted</l>
<l n="116" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He'd made everybody drunk!</l>
<l n="117" part="N" TEIform="l">And McPherson says: ‘Well, Ginger,</l>
<l n="118" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You did pretty well, I heard;</l>
<l n="119" part="N" TEIform="l">But you must admit you're beaten,</l>
<l n="120" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Joe—I rode the Oozlum Bird!'</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="121" part="N" TEIform="l">“Said he'd often studied science</l>
<l n="122" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Long before he'd came out here,</l>
<l n="123" part="N" TEIform="l">And he'd struck a sort of notion,</l>
<l n="124" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Which you'll think is mighty queer—</l>
<l n="125" part="N" TEIform="l">That the earth rolls round to <hi TEIform="hi">eastward</hi></l>
<l n="126" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And that birds, by rising high,</l>
<l n="127" part="N" TEIform="l">Might just stop and travel <hi TEIform="hi">westward</hi>,</l>
<l n="128" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">While the earth was rolling by!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="129" part="N" TEIform="l">“So he saddled up the Oozlum,</l>
<l n="130" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Rose some miles above the plain,</l>
<l n="131" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">Let the Earth turn underneath him</hi></l>
<l n="132" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">Till he spotted the Domain!</hi></l>
<pb n="6" TEIform="pb" id="d64e2159"/>
<l n="133" part="N" TEIform="l">Then came down, and walked up George-street,</l>
<l n="134" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Got the stuff and wired to me;</l>
<l n="135" part="N" TEIform="l">Rose again and reached Marengo</l>
<l n="136" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Just as easy as could be!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="137" part="N" TEIform="l">“ ‘But,' says I, ‘if you went westward</l>
<l n="138" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Just as simple as you say,</l>
<l n="139" part="N" TEIform="l">How did you get back?' He answered:</l>
<l n="140" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">‘Oh, I came the other way!'</l>
<l n="141" part="N" TEIform="l">So in six-and-twenty hours,</l>
<l n="142" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Take the yarn for what it's worth,</l>
<l n="143" part="N" TEIform="l">Jock McPherson and the Oozlum</l>
<l n="144" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Had been all around the earth!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="145" part="N" TEIform="l">“It's a curious bird, the Oozlum,</l>
<l n="146" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a bird that's mighty wise,</l>
<l n="147" part="N" TEIform="l">For it always flies tail-first to</l>
<l n="148" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Keep the dust out of its eyes!</l>
<l n="149" part="N" TEIform="l">And I heard that since McPherson</l>
<l n="150" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Did that famous record ride,</l>
<l n="151" part="N" TEIform="l">They won't let a man get near 'em,</l>
<l n="152" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Could n't catch one if you tried!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="153" part="N" TEIform="l">“If you don't believe the story,</l>
<l n="154" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And some people don't, yer know;</l>
<l n="155" part="N" TEIform="l">Why the blinded map'll prove it,</l>
<l n="156" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Strike me fat!” said Ginger Joe.</l>
<l n="157" part="N" TEIform="l">“Look along the Queensland border,</l>
<l n="158" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On the South Australian side,</l>
<l n="159" part="N" TEIform="l">There's this township! christened Birdsville,</l>
<l n="160" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">'Cause of Jock McPherson's ride!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e2254"><pb n="7" TEIform="pb" id="d64e2255"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Why?</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">The child is born, becomes a man,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is wise or foolish, rich or poor;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">In any case 't is but a span,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And life is o'er!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Will some philosopher who can</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Translate the writing on the wall</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Of life, explain to us why man</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is born at all!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e2286"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Baby.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the baby's asleep there is calm,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the baby's asleep!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And a peaceful unspeakable charm</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Which is soothing and deep.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And the air has a beautiful balm,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Soft and sweet as the chant of a psalm,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">When the baby's asleep there is calm,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the baby's asleep!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">When the baby's awake there's a storm,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the baby's awake!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And he carries about in his form</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A perennial ache!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And the smothered-up adjectives swarm</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And the air is decidedly warm,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">When the baby's awake there's a storm,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the baby's awake!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e2343"><pb n="8" TEIform="pb" id="d64e2344"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Drifting Down The Darling.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">It was in the early eighties,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When a man could see some fun,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">In the eighties when the praties</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Stood at twenty pounds a ton,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And a working-man's resources</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Would n't run to feeding horses,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">That we started down the Darling with McGindy!</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Now McGindy was a wonder,</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Though we'd often thought him daft,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And he worked away like thunder</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Till he made a sort of raft,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And a decent craft we thought her</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">When we launched her on the water,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And we drifted down the Darling to Menindie!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Drifting down the Darling on McGindy's rickety raft!</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">When the snags were all before us and the breeze was right abaft,</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">She was lumpy, rough, and ugly, and a cranky kind o' craft,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">When we drifted down the Darling to Menindie!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And McGindy'd been a sailor,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And of course he rigged the raft,</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">He'd been mate aboard a whaler,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he understood the graft.</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Well you should have heard the cheering</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">And the borak and the jeering</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">When we started down the Darling with McGindy!</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">It was awful work to steer her,</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For she <hi TEIform="hi">would n't</hi> come to port,</l></lg>
<pb n="9" TEIform="pb" id="d64e2438"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">And whene'er a snag came near her</l>
<l n="29" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You can bet the raft was caught;</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">But the laughter and the singing!</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">It was splendid, it was ringing,</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">When we drifted down the Darling to Menindie!</l>
<l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">Drifting down the Darling, etc.!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="34" part="N" TEIform="l">Thompson came from Ena-Weena</l>
<l n="35" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the wool he'd had to class,</l>
<l n="36" part="N" TEIform="l">And he played the concertina</l>
<l n="37" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Pretty nearly up to Cass.</l>
<l n="38" part="N" TEIform="l">I was Mozart on the whistle,</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">And we made the welkin bristle</l>
<l n="40" part="N" TEIform="l">When we started down the Darling with McGindy!</l>
<l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">Old McGindy, as a singer,</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was the dandy of the West,</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">He was recognised the ringer,</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the absolutely best;</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">And he'd simply made you shiver</l>
<l n="46" part="N" TEIform="l">If you'd heard him on the river</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">When we drifted down the Darling to Menindie!</l>
<l n="48" part="N" TEIform="l">Drifting down the Darling, etc.!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e2509"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Socialism And Anarchy.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Her maiden name was Anna,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">She'd a very charming manner,</l>
<l n="3" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She was very fond of socials, so became a socialist;</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Till one evening, in the mist, her</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Sunday masher stooped and kissed her,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And, despite her predilections, she became an Anna-kissed!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e2534"><pb n="10" TEIform="pb" id="d64e2535"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Only Bank Not To Be Robbed.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Oh, tell me,” said the man with cash</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To place at fixed deposit—</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">“Oh, tell me,” for I am not rash,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">What bank has no absconder flash?</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">No easy question, was it?</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">“Well,” we replied, “as things now go</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The query makes us shiver.</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">You want a bank that's safe? Just so!</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">The only bank of which we know,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is the bank beside the river!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e2572"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">How We Drove The Trotter.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, he was a handsome trotter, and he could n't be completer,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">He had such a splendid action and he trotted to this metre,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a pace and such a courage, such a record-killing power,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">That he did his mile in two-fifteen, his twenty in the hour.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">When he trotted on the Bathurst-road the pace it was a panter,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">But he broke the poet's rhythm when he broke out in a canter—</l></lg>
<pb n="11" TEIform="pb" id="d64e2595"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">As we were remarking the pace was a panter,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">But just as we liked it he broke in a canter,</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And rattled along with a motion terrific,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And scattered the sparks with a freedom prolific;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">He tugged at the bit and he jerked at the bridle,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">We pulled like a demon, the effort was idle,</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">The bit in his teeth and the rein in the crupper,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">We did n't much care to get home to our supper.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Then we went</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Like the wind,</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And our hands</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">They were skinned,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And we thought</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">With a dread</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">To go over his head,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">And we tugged</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And we strove,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">Could n't say</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">That we drove</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">Till we found</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">It had stopped</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">And the gallop was dropped!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">Then he dropped into a trot again as steady as a pacer,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">And we thought we had a dandy that was sure to make a racer,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">That would rival all the Yankees and was bound to beat the British,</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">Not a bit of vice about him though he was a trifle skittish;</l>
<l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">Past the buggies and the sulkies on the road we went a-flying,</l>
<l n="34" part="N" TEIform="l">For the pace it was a clinker, and they had no chance of trying,</l>
<pb n="12" TEIform="pb" id="d64e2688"/>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">But for fear he'd start a canter we were going to stop his caper</l>
<l n="36" part="N" TEIform="l">When he bolted like a bullet at a flying piece of paper—</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">Helter skelter,</l>
<l n="38" part="N" TEIform="l">What a pelter!</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a pace to win a welter!</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Rush,</l>
<l n="41" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Race,</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Tear!</l>
<l n="43" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Flying through the air!</l>
<l n="44" part="N" TEIform="l">Wind a-humming,</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">Fears benumbing,</l>
<l n="46" part="N" TEIform="l">Here's another trap a-coming!</l>
<l n="47" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Shouts!</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Bash!</l>
<l n="49" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Crash!</l>
<l n="50" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Moses, what a smash!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e2743"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">What Boots It?</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Down to the depths from whence he sprung,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Unwept, unhonoured, and unsung!”</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">What recks he when he's in the grave</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">If history calls him fool or knave?</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Do men revere great Shakespere's name?</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">To Shakespere it is all the same!</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Is Danton's memory detested?</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, Danton is n't interested!</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">What praise or blame, what cheers or groans</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Affect a buried box of bones?</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e2780"><pb n="13" TEIform="pb" id="d64e2781"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Fool Who Means No Harm.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">When Thomas Jenkins took the gun</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And pointed it at Jones,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">The gun went off and Jones was done,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And loud were Jenkins' groans;</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">His grief was dreadful for to see,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They could n't make him calm,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And as he sobbed he said that he</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Had “meant to do no harm.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">When Jenkins took away the chair</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As Brown was going to sit,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">He felt the keenest of despair</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">'Cause poor Brown's spine was split;</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Poor Jenkins he was deeply pained,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">His grief caused much alarm,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">But still he carefully explained</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He “meant to do no harm.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Give me a burglar bold and bad</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who'd shoot a man on sight,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Give me a murderer, begad,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who'd kill a man outright!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Give me a villain who is cool</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And finds in crime a charm,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">But heaven save me from the fool</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who “means to do no harm”!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e2865"><pb n="14" TEIform="pb" id="d64e2866"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">A Love Song.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Ye talk of dames of high degree,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With aspirations soary O!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Who thrill the university</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With economic glory O!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">A proud possession such may be,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And wordly wise and wary O!</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">But take the lot and give to me</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The curly hair o' Mary O!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Their mathematics may be sweet,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Their propositions cheery O!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Philosophy may be a treat,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And logic never dreary O!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">But I prefer a style that's not</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of nonsense quite so chary O!</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">I'd sooner have than all the lot,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The winsome smile o' Mary O!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">A doctor maiden may be fine,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A lawyer maiden finer O!</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">A maid in politics may shine,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And yet would I resign her O!</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">For I prefer the girly girl,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Whose style is light and airy O!</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">The winsome smile, the rippling curl,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The laughing eyes o' Mary O!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e2949"><pb n="15" TEIform="pb" id="d64e2950"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Modern Woman.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">She's taken our shirt and collar and tie,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For a manly rig she reaches,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And really we are wondering why</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She has n't annexed our—overcoat!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">She struts along with a manly stride</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Past stores and public-houses,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">But, bless you, would n't she put on side</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If she only wore the—macintosh!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e2982"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Impressionist School.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">I'd love to be an artist,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">An artist free from guile,</l>
<l n="3" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And wear long hair</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a great big stare,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And a transcendental smile.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">I'd love to paint a picture</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">A picture full of thrill,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of a knock-kneed horse</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On the Randwick course</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And the moon behind the hill.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">I'd love to paint a portrait</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">A portrait full of soul,</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of the cross-eyed girl</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With her hair in curl</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And a neck like a barber's pole.</l></lg>
<pb n="16" TEIform="pb" id="d64e3034"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">I'd love to paint a landscape,</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">A landscape bold and free,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With a Vandyck cliff</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a crimson skiff</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">On a lilac-tinted sea.</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e3053"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Town And Country.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the town it's all expense,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the bush you're free from duns;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">In the town they run the rents,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the bush they rent the runs!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">In the town they walk or run,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the bush they always ride;</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">In the town they hide the sun,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the bush they sun the hide!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e3084"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Actress And Artist.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">They both must draw if they would soar.</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">The Actress often “feints.”</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">The Artist is a party who</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Must draw before he paints.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">But there they part, though both for art</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">May have the same applause.</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">The Actress is a person who</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Must paint before she draws!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e3115"><pb n="17" TEIform="pb" id="d64e3116"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Day Of The Lovelorn Larrikin.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">She's a proper all-right 'un, the donah,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A lady she is, to the life,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And you bet as when I am her owner</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She'll make me a shying good wife.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Not a bloke in the push could look prouder</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When I toddles her down to the wharf,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">For a trip down the 'Arbour to Chowder</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For a chazzy away at Clontarf!</l></lg>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Chorus:</hi></p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">With yer eyes like the stars that's above yer</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Which is set in the heavenly blue,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, spare me days, kleiner, I love yer!</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, strike me pink, Sally, I do!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">You can talk of your gentleman's daughters,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And your knock-me-down aristocrats,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">But compared to a gal like Sal Waters</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Well I reckon that lot has got rats!</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">When she smiles at me sweetly like Heaven</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Then I thinks with a sort of a choke</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">You could bet on me chuckin' the seven</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If she slung me for some other bloke!</l></lg>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Chorus:</hi></p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">So it's nark it now, Sal, or I'll shove yer!</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Don't be kiddin' a bloke as is true!</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">For it's no dicken pitch as I love yer,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, strike me pink, Sally, I do!</l></lg>
<pb n="18" TEIform="pb" id="d64e3207"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Though I've never been short of a fiver,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Still I ain't what a bloke would call rich,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">And I ain't got the style and the guiver</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of them bank clerks and students and sich.</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">But if phrases polite I ain't pat in,</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You can cotton to me when I speak,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">And a bloke can have love without Latin</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a cove have a heart without Greek.</l></lg>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Chorus:</hi></p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">With yer eyes like the stars that's above yer</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As is set in the heavenly blue,</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">I'm the bloke, Sal, as really do love yer,</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, strike me pink, Sally, I do!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e3253"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Who Wrote The Shakespere Plays?</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">No lover of poetry, I,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For the qualification is lacking,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And indeed it were vain to deny</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That I could n't tell Browning from Blacking.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">But Shakespere's the author, I'll vow,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And nothing my faith can be shakin',</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">For it would be ridiculous, now,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If we talked about “Lamb's Tales of Bacon.”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e3284"><pb n="19" TEIform="pb" id="d64e3285"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">On His Own.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">You may see a man full of decorum</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who preaches to foes and to friends,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">With a face that's as long as a fiddle</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a mouth that turns down at the ends,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And a general air of dejection</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a sigh that approaches a groan,</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">But you can't be too sure</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">That he's perfectly pure</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Till you catch him “away on his own.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">For the family father of Britain</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is a model of all that is good</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">When he's home in the family circle,</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he always does just what he should,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And yet, at the close of the summer</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You'll find him in Paris alone</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Where he'll dance a quadrille</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">With a <hi TEIform="hi">fille</hi> at Mabille</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If you catch him away on his own!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And it sometimes occurs in this country</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That a man who is very sedate</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And attends at his church on the Sunday</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And who, possibly, passes the plate,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">May be sultry as sult in the city,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When in different company thrown,</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And be equally bad</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">As a sinner, begad,</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If you catch him away on his own!</l></lg>
<pb n="20" TEIform="pb" id="d64e3379"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">There are men who will frown at “theayters,”</l>
<l n="29" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And who think it is wicked to smile,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">And who turn up their eyes to the ceiling</l>
<l n="31" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">At the hint or suspicion of guile;</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">Who are demons at pool and at billiards,</l>
<l n="33" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Which at home they would never condone,</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And are awfully loud</l>
<l n="35" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And will shout for the crowd</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If you catch 'em away on their own!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, you can't take a horse by his colour,</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Nor a woman by what she may wear;</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">And you can't take a book by the cover,</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Nor a bard by the cut of his hair.</l>
<l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">And although to all virtue and goodness</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Respect should be properly shown;</l>
<l n="43" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Still you can't tell a man</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Till his actions you scan</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">When you catch him away on his own!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e3442"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Ode To Maoriland.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Sweet land of the Maori</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Where grows the tall kaori</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And ferns grow in splendour in dells that are flaori,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the mountains are taori</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And hot-springs are shaori,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And song-birds sing blithe in the land of the Maori.</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e3466"><pb n="21" TEIform="pb" id="d64e3467"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">“Shouting.”</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Bill Jones went to the grocer's shop</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To buy a pound of tea,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And said to Johnson, standing there,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Will you have one with me?”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And Johnson said he didn't mind</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(He loved Bill like a brother);</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">They had two pounds, then Johnson said,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“We better have another.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Then Smith came in and Jones proposed</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They'd have another pound;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And then they stood till Brown came in</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And shouted tea all round.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And there they stayed for several hours</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As happy as could be,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Till each one of the party had</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Some fourteen pounds of tea.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And everyone who saw them said</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“What fools these fellows be,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">To stand around here all day long</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A-shouting pounds of tea!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Had they been shouting whiskey, schnapps,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And brandy, rum and beer,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Until they all got speechless drunk,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">It would not seem so queer;</l></lg>
<pb n="22" TEIform="pb" id="d64e3550"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">But things that they could cart away</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And use some other time!</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">What absolute absurdity;</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In fact, almost a crime!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">True friendship can alone be shown</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">By wilful waste of wealth;</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">And as men hate to feel too well</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They “drink each other's health.”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e3579"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Frog In The Well.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There was a frog dropped down a well,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">What time the well was dry,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Who sat him down just where he fell,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And looked up to the sky;</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And though the time was broad daylight</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There burst upon his view</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">The sparkling stars all shining bright</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Upon the ether blue!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">So froggie gazed in mute surprise,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Till he found voice to say,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">“I scarcely can believe my eyes</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To see the stars by day;</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">But now I know it must be so,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And sages all agree</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">That as the deeper down you go</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The more you learn and see!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e3636"><pb n="23" TEIform="pb" id="d64e3637"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">A Back-Block Settlement.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the Mickety-Mulga Wholloper met the Cobbity shearers' Cook,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There was trouble upon the station, you can bet,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">For the Cook he had a debt which he'd recorded in the book,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he swore the Wholloper had n't paid it yet.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Wholloper swore he did n't owe the Cook a blessed cent,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For he always paid his shearing-shed account,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And in case the Cook did not perceive precisely what he meant</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He'd be pleased to fight his gills for the amount!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Then the Cook he cast reflections on the Wholloper's family tree,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Said his male relations mostly lived in gaol,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">All but Jimmy, hanged in Goulburn, as the rest deserved to be,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">While the ladies were particularly frail!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And the adjectives he used for illustration they were grand,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he coined 'em in his own especial mint,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">But they were of such a nature, you will easy understand,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As would hardly bear repeating here in print!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">So we made a ring around 'em and the battle was begun,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the language it was forcible and free,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And a better mill was never seen before upon a run,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Nor a better could a sportsman wish to see.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Cook he landed Wholloper a beauty on the jaw,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Saying “<hi TEIform="hi">Now</hi>, will you admit you owe them beans?”</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">But immediately afterwards the hash-constructor saw</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">What the art of concentration really means!</l></lg>
<pb n="24" TEIform="pb" id="d64e3722"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">For the Wholloper he countered with a daisy on the neck</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he followed with another on the point,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">And before the Cook recovered he became a perfect wreck</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With a Grecian nose completely out of joint;</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">Still they kept the fun a-going, and the blows were freely shared,</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And they made it very merry for a while,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">But at length the Cook was beaten and the referee declared</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They had fought it in a gentlemanly style!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">Now there's nothing could be nicer or more beautiful to see</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Than the meeting of them two upon the morn,</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">For with features bruised and swollen they were friendly as could be</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And shook hands as though the pair were brothers born.</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">And the shearers and the rouseabouts an edict they enforced,</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That the winner'd squared all overdue amounts,</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">And in terms of approbation, too, they cheerfully endorsed</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a simple way of settling all accounts!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e3778"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">A Quatrain.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">The humble mind let none despise,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of wit let none be vain,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">The germ of genius dormant lies</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In every human brain!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e3796"><pb n="25" TEIform="pb" id="d64e3797"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Tobacco!</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">When sorrows gather, troubles crowd,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">And when with grief the heart is bowed,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">What solace in thy fragrant cloud!</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Immortal weed, tobacco!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Away with women and with wine!</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">What charms have they compared with thine?</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Consoling, comforting, divine,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Most excellent tobacco!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">No sonsie lass or winsome girl</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">That sets the senses in a whirl</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Can match the joyous upward curl</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of gentle smoke, tobacco!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">To Hades with the flowing bowl</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">That blights the mind and warps the soul!</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">But give me still my daily dole</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of generous tobacco!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">What hurts, what ills, what woes, what harms,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">What worries, troubles, or alarms</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Can c'er withstand thy wondrous charms,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Sweet soothing weed, tobacco!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e3869"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Two Fools.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There is the fool that spends his money fast,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Grows old and dies a pauper at the last.</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">There is the fool that hoards it to the end.</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">And leaves it for some other fool to spend.</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e3887"><pb n="26" TEIform="pb" id="d64e3888"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Rocking-Chair.</head>
<p TEIform="p">[English doctors now declare that the rocking-chair does harm by disturbing the equilibrium].</p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">When I used to visit Mary</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On a Sunday afternoon,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">She was shy and she was chary,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But was not too shy to spoon.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Though she said I tried to shock her</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And had doubts if I was true,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">She agreed with me the rocker</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was convenient for two!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">If the doctor had but faltered,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Or the fact he hadn't found!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Now I s'pose the case is altered</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And we'll have to sit around</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Like a pair of pupil-teachers</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">At a mission Sunday-school,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And we'll bless all human creatures,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Save the doctor. Hang the fool!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Now I quite agree with Mary,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And she quite agrees with me,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">That these doctors are too wary,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And too 'cute for such as we.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">But in spite of Mrs. Grundy,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">I'll be stroking Mary's hair,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And be holding her on Sunday</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the good old rocking-chair!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e3974"><pb n="27" TEIform="pb" id="d64e3975"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">They Went To Law.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Brown and Jones of Simpsonville</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They owned adjoining land.</l>
<l n="3" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Yes!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Owned adjoining land,</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And you can understand</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">That Brown and Jones of Simpsonville</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Were cross enough to make them ill,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Their hatred it was fit to kill,</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Undoubtedly they had the will,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Did Brown and Jones of Simpsonville,</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who owned adjoining land!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Now Brown and Jones of Simpsonville</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Had one dividing fence.</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Yes!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">One dividing fence,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But that was quite immense.</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">The fence was broke, and Lanky Bill,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">The groom of Brown of Simpsonville,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Allowed the cows to roam at will</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">To Jones's barley paddock still</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Through that dividing fence.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">Then Mister Jones of Simpsonville</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He swore he'd go to law.</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Yes!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Swore he'd go to law,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For he was feeling sore.</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">And Quilp, the lawyer, famed for skill,</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">Discussed with Jones the harm and ill</l></lg>
<pb n="28" TEIform="pb" id="d64e4072"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">The cows of Brown had done, until</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">The smallest Jack and youngest Jill</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">Within the town of Simpsonville</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Knew Jones had gone to law!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">And Mister Brown of Simpsonville</l>
<l n="34" part="N" TEIform="l">He got a lawyer too.</l>
<l n="35" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Yes!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Got a lawyer too,</l>
<l n="37" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He meant to see it through!</l>
<l n="38" part="N" TEIform="l">And each one swore the legal mill</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">Would stop the other's cheek and “frill,”</l>
<l n="40" part="N" TEIform="l">And give his nibs a nasty pill</l>
<l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">To swallow with his breakfast grill.</l>
<l n="42" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, Brown and Jones of Simpsonville</l>
<l n="43" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They meant to see it through!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="44" part="N" TEIform="l">The case came on at Simpsonville,</l>
<l n="45" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The lawyers made it last.</l>
<l n="46" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Yes!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="47" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Lawyers made it last,</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They never work too fast.</l>
<l n="49" part="N" TEIform="l">But when the lawyers had their fill</l>
<l n="50" part="N" TEIform="l">Of Brown and Jones's safe and till,</l>
<l n="51" part="N" TEIform="l">Then Mr. Justice Candysquill</l>
<l n="52" part="N" TEIform="l">Nonsuited Jones, allowed him nil;</l>
<l n="53" part="N" TEIform="l">The trespass case of Simpsonville</l>
<l n="54" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Had finished up at last!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="55" part="N" TEIform="l">When Brown received his lawyer's bill</l>
<l n="56" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You should have heard his tones,</l>
<l n="57" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Yes!</l></lg>
<pb n="29" TEIform="pb" id="d64e4170"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="58" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Should have heard his tones,</l>
<l n="59" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And those remarks of Jones!</l>
<l n="60" part="N" TEIform="l">And Mrs. Jones's voice was shrill,</l>
<l n="61" part="N" TEIform="l">And Mrs. Brown was simply ill,</l>
<l n="62" part="N" TEIform="l">And both the clients longed to kill</l>
<l n="63" part="N" TEIform="l">The lawyers and the Lanky Bill,</l>
<l n="64" part="N" TEIform="l">And pave the streets of Simpsonville</l>
<l n="65" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With those attorneys' bones!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="66" part="N" TEIform="l">So Brown and Jones of Simpsonville</l>
<l n="67" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They owned adjoining land.</l>
<l n="68" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Yes!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="69" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Owned adjoining land,</l>
<l n="70" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That is, you'll understand,</l>
<l n="71" part="N" TEIform="l">They owned the land, of course, until</l>
<l n="72" part="N" TEIform="l">They each received the lawyer's bill,</l>
<l n="73" part="N" TEIform="l">And then they sold to fill the till</l>
<l n="74" part="N" TEIform="l">Of those two lawyers, men of skill.</l>
<l n="75" part="N" TEIform="l">They're carting wood in Simpsonville,</l>
<l n="76" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The lawyers own the land!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="77" part="N" TEIform="l">Dear reader, I'm run out o' rhymes,</l>
<l n="78" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A most unpleasant jar.</l>
<l n="79" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Yes!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="80" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Most unpleasant jar!</l>
<l n="81" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But here the moral are:</l>
<l n="82" part="N" TEIform="l">(I should have said “here is,” but still</l>
<l n="83" part="N" TEIform="l">What odds?) Remember, if you will,</l>
<l n="84" part="N" TEIform="l">That lots of law means empty till.</l>
<l n="85" part="N" TEIform="l">The most successful clients still</l>
<l n="86" part="N" TEIform="l">Are like that pair at Simpsonville,</l>
<l n="87" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They dunno where they are!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e4272"><pb n="30" TEIform="pb" id="d64e4273"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Daffodil Dance.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">My sweet was the belle of the Daffodil Dance</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the smile of her welcome was thrilling.</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">When I asked for a dance at the very first chance</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She was sweetly, delightfully, willing.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">There was love in her modest yet amorous glance,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the waltz was a poem, a dream, a romance!</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">My sweet was the belle of the Daffodil Dance</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the smile of her welcome was thrilling!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Her violet eyes were as blue as the skies,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the bloom on her cheek like the roses!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And her hand like the lily that dreamily sighs</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When alone in the wild it reposes!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And her teeth like the snowdrop that tenderly lies</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">'Neath the fronds of the fern when the summer winds rise.</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Her violet eyes were as blue as the skies,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the bloom on her cheek like the roses.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">She smiled as we danced at the Daffodil Dance</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To the swing of the rhythmical metre.</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, she smiled as she whispered, while peering askance,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Could your compliments be no completer?</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">You have spoken of roses and lilies; perchance</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There is one other flower that yet might enhance</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">What you've said.” Here she gave me a timorous glance—</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Do n't you think that the two-lips are sweeter?”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e4356"><pb n="31" TEIform="pb" id="d64e4357"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Kerosene!</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Matilda Jane of Lachlan Plain,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The servant at the place,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Was country bred; her hair was red,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And rosy was her face.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">She'd never shirk her morning work,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was always neat and clean;</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">But I must admit she always lit</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The fire with kerosene!</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Sene!</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Sene!</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The kindling wood was green!</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">But deuce a bit she cared for it,</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She had the kerosene!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">One morn at six she had to fix</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And set the fire aglow;</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">She grabbed the tin and poured it in</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And over went the show!</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">A sort of snort; a loud report,</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With screeches in between.</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">The roof was rent; away she went!</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(As did the kerosene!)</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Sene!</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Sene!</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She left this earthly scene</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">For Kingdom-come upon a drum</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of Mountain kerosene!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e4446"><pb n="32" TEIform="pb" id="d64e4447"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Old Dutch Clock.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was a winter dull and dreary, in the evening I was weary,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">When I sat before a bright and glowing fire.</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">As I sat alone and pondered, still my thoughts for ever wandered</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">On the folly of the human heart's desire;</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Of the thirst for high position, of the cravings of ambition,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And the yearnings that our lives all interlock;</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And the only sign or token that the stillness yet had broken</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Was the ticking of the old Dutch clock!</l></lg>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Chorus:</hi></p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">With its tick tick, tick tick, ever on the go,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">As I watched its heavy pendulum swinging to and fro;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">How the highest of ambition still it ever seemed to mock,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">The tick, tick, ticking of the old Dutch Clock!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">As I listened to the ticking, and I watched the flames a-flicking,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">Saw a mother with a child upon her knee;</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">She was laughing, she was happy as she kissed the little chappie,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">And she whispered “what's my darling going to be?”</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And the flames went on a-flicking, and the clock continued ticking</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">Till I saw the child a felon in the dock!</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, we know not what's before us, nor the fates that hover o'er us</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">As we listen to the old Dutch clock!</l></lg>
<pb n="33" TEIform="pb" id="d64e4521"/>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Chorus:</hi></p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">With its tick tick, tick tick, swaying to and fro,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">So the seconds and the minutes and the years for ever go;</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">How our hopes and aspirations still it ever seems to mock;</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">The tick, tick, ticking of the old Dutch clock!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Then a scene of love and leisure, full of happiness and pleasure,</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">When the wedding bells rang out a happy chime,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">But the clock ticked on the faster to a scene of deep disaster,</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">And of misery and hopelessness and crime;</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">And as happy scenes retreated and ambition was defeated,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">And the highest hopes were ended with a shock,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">Still I seemed to hear the laughter of the fates that follow after</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">In the ticking of the old Dutch clock!</l></lg>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Chorus:</hi></p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">With its tick tick, tick tick, ever on the go,</l>
<l n="34" part="N" TEIform="l">Time was flying as the pendulum was swinging to and fro;</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">And our weak attempts to cope with fate it ever seemed to mock;</l>
<l n="36" part="N" TEIform="l">The tick, tick, ticking of the old Dutch clock!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e4585"><pb n="34" TEIform="pb" id="d64e4586"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Australian</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">His clothes are West of England tweed;</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">His boots are from the Strand;</l>
<l n="3" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The bike which he propels with speed</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Was made in Yankeeland.</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He drinks a glass of Belgian gin,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Jamaica rum, perchance,</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And smokes the “best Virginia” in</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">A pipe that's “made in France.”</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">He looks at his imported watch to see the time of day,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And hurries, for he wants to see a new imported play.</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">The lamp is made in Germany that lights him on his way;</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">He's a patriotic thoroughbred Australian!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">He's a patriotic thoroughbred Australian!</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And he sticks up for his country like a man!</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For it's good for growing mutton</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But it could n't make a button</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">For the trousers of a true Australi-an!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He comes up to his cottage where</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">There's lager from the Rhine,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And seats himself upon a chair</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Of Austrian design.</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">His English hat he places on the Chinese cheffonier</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And drinks from his Italian glass his German lager beer;</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">He strikes Italian matches and he lights the German lamp;</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">He sees the jam and pickles with the real imported stamp;</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">He tries the Dutch piano for the latest foreign vamp;</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">He's a patriotic thoroughbred Australian!</l></lg>
<pb n="35" TEIform="pb" id="d64e4676"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">He's a patriotic thoroughbred Australian!</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">And he sticks up for his country when he can.</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">It's the champion for cricket</l>
<l n="31" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When McKibbin beats the wicket.</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">That's sufficient for the true Australi-an!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The Chinese washstand in his room</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Is near a Russian rug,</l>
<l n="35" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He fills the Yankee basin from</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">The German water jug;</l>
<l n="37" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He takes his German razor and</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">He shaves himself with ease;</l>
<l n="39" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He reaches for the towel-stand</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">(The latest Japanese!)</l>
<l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">With Paris soap he washes off Australian dust and dirt,</l>
<l n="42" part="N" TEIform="l">Puts on an Irish collar and an English undershirt;</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">He laces up his London boots, which very seldom hurt</l>
<l n="44" part="N" TEIform="l">A patriotic thoroughbred Australian!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">He's a patriotic thoroughbred Australian!</l>
<l n="46" part="N" TEIform="l">And he sticks up for his country like a man;</l>
<l n="47" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he buys of all creation,</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Bar the land of his location,</l>
<l n="49" part="N" TEIform="l">He's a thorough-going true Australi-an!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e4750"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">How We All Look At It.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">No doubt that there are faults in all</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As laid to mankind's charge,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">But let's be thankful ours are small</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">While other folks' are large.</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e4768"><pb n="36" TEIform="pb" id="d64e4769"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Who Stole The Ponies?</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Away down the Darling by the Callewatta Forks</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the dreary, weary desert where the stone is</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">On the right you find the region of the Raffertys and Rorkes;</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On the left you see the Learys and Maloneys.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">We were always pretty careful when the steamer anchored there,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">It was well indeed for strangers to be chary,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">For the Learys and Maloneys held the belt from County Clare,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Raffertys and Rorkes from Tipperary!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">They were all of them selectors on the Steelandummie run,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the owner of the run was named McPherson,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">He was Scotch and he was clannish (and his clan was Number One)</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A sedate and very sober-sided person!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And he ran a lot of stock around adjacent to the Forks,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he lost, he said, a half-a-dozen ponies,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And he swore they had been stolen by the Raffertys and Rorkes,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If they had'nt by the Learys and Maloneys!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Then the Learys and Maloneys said the men from County Clare</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Would n't even steal a pansy from the prairie!</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Raffertys and Rorkes they quite accorded with them there,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“But they often stole the pigs from Tipperary!”</l>
<pb n="37" TEIform="pb" id="d64e4838"/>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Then the row it fairly started; there was murther at the Forks</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">From the minute that McPherson lost the ponies</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">It was dangerous to come betwixt the Raffertys and Rorkes</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When they waited for the Learys and Maloneys!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">When the Learys crossed the river there was “wigs upon the green”</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And diversion for the men from Tipperary!</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">When a Rafferty or Rorke upon the other side was seen,</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He would find things just as willing and as scary!</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">But as you are not agoin' to the Callewatta Forks</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">I can sell you half-a-dozen decent ponies,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">But you had n't better show them to the Raffertys and Rorkes,</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Nor McPherson, nor the Learys and Maloneys!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e4880"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Station Life.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, a station life is the life for me,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the cold baked mutton in the morning!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, the glorious ride o'er the plains so free,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the cold baked mutton in the morning!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And the rising moon on the mountain's brow!</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And the ringtailed 'possum on the gum tree bough!</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And the leathery damper and the salted cow,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the cold baked mutton in the morning!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e4911"><pb n="38" TEIform="pb" id="d64e4912"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Come To Orange.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">If you're roasting up at Dubbo, if you're boiling up at Bourke,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Come to Orange, where the breezes are a-blowing!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">If you're gasping on the Darling, where it's sudden death to work,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Come to Orange, where the breezes are a-blowing!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">If you live in any village on the other side of H—l,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the average thermometer's a hundred in the well,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And the stagnant air is reeking with an Asiatic smell,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Come to Orange, where the breezes are a-blowing!</l></lg>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Chorus</hi>—</p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">There is dew upon the daisies in the morning,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">There's a freshness and a sweetness in the air,</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And you feel the balmy breezes</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Come a-wafting through the treeses</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">As you could'nt feel 'em any other where!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">If your tongue is like a cattle dog's and hanging out a foot,</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Come to Orange, where the breezes are a-blowing!</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">If you find the perspiration is a-filling of your boot,</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Come to Orange, where the breezes are a-blowing!</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">If the summer sun is withering the million-acre block,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And a-scorching all the wool off every wether in the flock,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">If you notice that the pendulum is melted off the clock,</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Come to Orange, where the breezes are a-blowing!</l></lg>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Chorus</hi>:</p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">There is dew, etc.</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5000"><pb n="39" TEIform="pb" id="d64e5001"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Two Men And A Maid.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Two little dudes from the George-street block</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Up for a brief vacation!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">One little girl in a neat print frock,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Maid of the Mulga station!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Two little dudes with walking sticks,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Two little heads that the collars fix!</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Two little hats at nine-and six,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Two little dudes on a station!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">One little maid with a bashful smile</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Given for a salutation;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Two little dudes of the nan-nan style</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Bent on a captivation.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">One little maid with a smile so true,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">Curly hair of a nut-brown hue;</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Eyes of a liquid violet blue,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">One little maid on a station!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">“Did n't she fear her walks to take</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Over the grassy clearing?”</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">“Did n't she fear some nasty snake</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">His ugly head a-rearing?”</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">“Sirs,” she said, with an arching brow</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">And a smile that was hardly a smile somehow,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">“There are so many jackasses 'round here now</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That the snakes are disappearing!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5085"><pb n="40" TEIform="pb" id="d64e5086"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">King Whiskey.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">King Whiskey's father down in Hell,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He rubbed his hands with glee,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">“My son on earth is doing well,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Extremely well,” said he;</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">“Pile up the logs upon the blaze</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And let the furnace roar,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Another batch of Whiskey's slaves</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is hammering at the door.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">The flames shot up a brilliant red,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The grid was white with heat,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">A basting pot of boiling lead</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was placed on every seat.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">“Ha, ha,” said Satan, “this is neat;</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">We have no cause to fear</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">That they'll complain they did not meet</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A warm reception here.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">King Whiskey sat upon his throne,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">His courtiers standing round,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">All meek, subservient in tone,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They bowed them to the ground.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">In tribute then they handed up</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Their stores of golden wealth,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And from the reeking poison cup</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They drank King Whiskey's health!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">And out beyond the palace gates</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The wives and mothers stand,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">And, breadless, loudly curse the fates</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That Whiskey rules the land.</l></lg>
<pb n="41" TEIform="pb" id="d64e5182"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">The courtiers dimly hear the cry,</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But Whiskey dulls their ears,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">“Fill up, let revelry run high,</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">We'll drown these childish fears!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">And men there are in Whiskey's land</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Complaining times are bad</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">And money getting scarcer and</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But little to be had;</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">And yet however bad is trade</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And things however flat,</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">King Whiskey's tribute must be paid,</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They can't go short of that!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">King Whiskey's courtiers soon grow old,</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And tribute's falling short,</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">The strength is gone, the blood is cold</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The once clear mind distraught!</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">And demons, imps, and grinning apes.</l>
<l n="46" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And glaring reptiles yell,</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">And loathsome forms and fearsome shapes</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">All point the road to Hell!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="49" part="N" TEIform="l">But Whiskey's court is bright and gay.</l>
<l n="50" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Nor do the ranks grow thin,</l>
<l n="51" part="N" TEIform="l">For as the old are borne away</l>
<l n="52" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The younger ones come in.</l>
<l n="53" part="N" TEIform="l">King Whiskey's father down in Hell,</l>
<l n="54" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He rubs his hands with glee,</l>
<l n="55" part="N" TEIform="l">“My son on earth is doing well,</l>
<l n="56" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Extremely well,” says he.</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5276"><pb n="42" TEIform="pb" id="d64e5277"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">How He Dyed.</head>
<p TEIform="p">   <hi TEIform="hi">By Von Jarrell</hi>.</p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">His second name was Nabbage,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And his head was like a cabbage,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And his hair was growing gray</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">In a most annoying way;</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He concluded that he'd toddle</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To the chemist's, for a model,</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For his antiquated noddle</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Filled his bosom with dismay.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Mr. N. had been red-headed—</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was a color to be dreaded—</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And for blue-black locks he sighed;</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And he bought the dye with pride.</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But his head (O wicked Mentor!)</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">From circumference to centre</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was a blue-green-brown magenta;</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">That's the tale of “How He Dyed!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5340"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Character And Reputation.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">If worldly wisdom you prefer,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Please mark this observation:</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Don't mind about your character</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But watch your reputation.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">For whether Fate shall make or mar,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Or Fortune float or sink you</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Depends much less on what you are</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Than on what people think you!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5371"><pb n="43" TEIform="pb" id="d64e5372"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Shearer's Life.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">A shearer's life is the life for me,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Hip, hip hurrah!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">From care and trouble a shearer's free</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">As ever a man desired to be,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">No worry to worry about has he,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Hip, hip hurrah!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">He mounts his horse, and away he'll go,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Hip, hip hurrah!</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">(That's when he is n't on foot, you know,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And travels a hundred miles or so,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And then, perhaps, there is n't a show),</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Hip, hip hurrah!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">A shearer's work is a noble work,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Hip, hip hurrah!</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">The sort one is n't inclined to shirk,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">You'll notice his cheerful, smiling smirk</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">With never a shed from here to Bourke,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Hip, hip hurrah!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">But give him a cut at a fleecy flock,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Hip, hip hurrah!</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">With beef as tough as a Sydney crock,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">And “brownie” dry and hard as rock,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And life is joy on a Western block,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Hip, hip hurrah!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">A pound is good with a decent score,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Hip, hip hurrah!</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">With leathery necks and dags galore,</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">A bad machine and a slippery floor,</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">And how could a shearer want for more?</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Hip, hip hurrah!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5473"><pb n="44" TEIform="pb" id="d64e5474"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Way Of It.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">When a man that's bad and bold has a wife, has a wife,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">When a man that's bad and bold has a wife,</l>
<l n="3" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When a man that's bad and bold</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Has a wife, though young or old,</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She is just as good as gold.</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Such is life!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">When a man that's good and true has a wife, has a wife,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">When a man that's good and true has a wife,</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When a man that's good and true</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Has a wife, she is a shrew</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With a temper all askew.</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Such is life!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5517"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Melodious Bullocky.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">'Tis of the Wild Colonial Boy [Come out of that saplin', Rat!]</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Brought up by honest parents [Now, Strawberry, what are yer at!]</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">He robbed them lordly squatters and [Whoa Diamond! Darn yer hump!]</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">And a terror to Horsetralia [Now then, Nugget, you mind that stump!]</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was at the age of seventeen [Gee back there, Dimple! Gee!]</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">He never, [Way there Baldy, sich a cow I never did see!]</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">He was his father's only son [Gee back there now. Rob Rov!]</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">And fondly did his parents love the Wild Colonial Boy!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5549"><pb n="45" TEIform="pb" id="d64e5550"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Jubilee Girl.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, the Jubilee girl,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With the Jubilee smile</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Wore a Jubilee dress</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In a Jubilee style!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Jubilee hair</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On her Jubilee head</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Was a Jubilee kind</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of a Jubilee red!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And her Jubilee shoes</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They were Jubilee neat</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">On the Jubilee toes</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of her Jubilee feet,</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And her Jubilee eyes</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of a Jubilee hue</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Were a Jubilee sort</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of a Jubilee blue!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Jubilee nose</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On her Jubilee face</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Had a Jubilee tilt</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With a Jubilee grace.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Jubilee miss</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Met her Jubilee boy</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">With a Jubilee kiss</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Full of Jubilee joy!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Jubilee flush</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On her Jubilee cheek</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">Was a Jubilee gush</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For the Jubilee week.</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">With her Jubilee brain</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In a Jubilee whirl,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">It was Jubilee time</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With the Jubilee girl!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5659"><pb n="46" TEIform="pb" id="d64e5660"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Praying For Rain.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">In vast and unimaginable space,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Where countless suns sent forth their life-light rays</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Each to his group of whirling satellites,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">There rolled one little miserable ball!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And on that ball a tiny atom knelt</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And prayed the great Controlling Force of all</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">To wreck the order of the universe;</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Unchain the suns and cast the spheres adrift,</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Set world careering madly on to world,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And bid ungoverned chaos come again!</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For what?</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">To damp the dot whereon the atom knelt!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5703"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Burglar's Song.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">A burglar once broke into song</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And just got through three bars</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">When someone hit him with a stave</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he saw greater stars.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">The poor man felt so broken up</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With sorrow, grief and pain,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">That fearing he'd perhaps break down</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He ne'er broke out again.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">At night he wandered on the shore</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And shunned the madding crowds,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">He watched the waves break o'er the rocks,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The moon break through the clouds.</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5747"><pb n="47" TEIform="pb" id="d64e5748"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Civilization.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, they walked along the footpath did the dapper suit of clothes</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Which were faultless as to fashion and to shape;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And the pretty little neck-tie of the color of the rose</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the macintosh with charming flowing cape,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And the shoes were quite artistic for a masculine adult</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And the turn-out was a credit to the tailor and his cult,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And the clothes appeared to glory in the excellent result;</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">And inside 'em was a Smooth-skinned Ape!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5779"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Life.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Infant; teething,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Thrush and croup.</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Schoolboy; marbles,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Top and hoop.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Youth; sweet picnics,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Cigarettes,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Cricket, football,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Sundry bets!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Young man; courtship</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Lovely she!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Married; youngsters</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Two or three</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Worry, trouble,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Smile and frown.</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">“In memoriam</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">William Brown!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5836"><pb n="48" TEIform="pb" id="d64e5837"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Phases Of The Ego.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There's the man you meet in the public street</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On a general business day;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And the man you see in his private home</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In a sociable kind of way;</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And the man you meet in the public bar</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Where Oblivion's water flows;</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">But from these apart in the silent heart</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is the man that nobody knows!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And the man will try to believe a lie;</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For there's nothing that's half so sweet</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">As to pour our praise on the ghost we raise</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With the aid of our self-deceit.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">But the vital spark is no idle dream</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Like the man that outward shows,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">For alone, apart in the silent heart</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is the man that nobody knows!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5895"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">A Bad Break!</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">The preacher quoted, and the cranks</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Among his congregation smiled,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">“How sharper than a serpent's thanks</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">It is to have a toothless child.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">He saw he erred, his eye grew wild,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He frowned upon the mirthful ranks:</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">“How toothless than a serpent's child</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">It is to have a sharper's thanks!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e5926"><pb n="49" TEIform="pb" id="d64e5927"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Jamberoora Flat.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There was always peace and harmony at Jamberoora Flat</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">With the chaps that struck the gutter and the boys that whipped the cat;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">We were like a band of brothers, there was no mistaking that</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Till the girl at Mother Murphy's came to Jamberoora Flat.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Mrs. Murphy kept a boarding-house; her eldest son was Pat;</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And the light and airy Mary, from her tootsies to her hat</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She was sweet and girly-girly</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And her hair was crisp and curly,</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And we all of us adored her—and particularly Pat!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Now there was a chap among us who was called Temora Mat,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Who was something of a talker and an ardent democrat,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">He would spout about the sorrows of the proletariat,</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">But the miners only reckoned he was talking through his hat;</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">Yet he thought he was the smartest of the boys upon the Flat,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And he started mashing Mary, and he aggravated Pat</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(Who considered it his duty)</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">So he landed Mat a beauty</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">And the latter could n't tell us where exactly he was at!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, they fought a lot of battles for a season after that,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">And Temora conquered sometimes, and occasionally Pat,</l>
<pb n="50" TEIform="pb" id="d64e5996"/>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And they kept the thing a-going but began to smell a rat</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">When a tall-and-swarthy stranger came to Jamberoora Flat;</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">For he flattened out the pair o' them and went and had a chat</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">With the light and airy Mary, who procured her Sunday hat,</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And they went away together;</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And I always wonder whether</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">We shall ever more be happy on the Jamberoora Flat!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e6021"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Ode To The Fryingpan.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">O Fryingpan!</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Thou great auxiliary to the slack-baked pie,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">The hard potato and the sodden scone!</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Precursor of the immortal Holloway,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Of Clements' tonic, and of Beecham's pills,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Whose ruthless black expanse of sooty iron</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Doth press upon a prostrate nation's chest,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">And hold it helpless for the fiend Dyspepsia!</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">What scowling husbands and sour-visaged wives</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Do pass their days in ill-starred bickerings,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">With constant jars, continual reproaches,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And all through thee, destroyer of the peace!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Invention of the Devil, sent to earth</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">To spoil our tempers and ensnare our souls,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">When shall humanity thy thraldom break,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">And chronic indigestion straight rebel</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Against the everlasting steaks and chops</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">Made deadly by the fiendish Fryingpan?</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">When will our wives, our sisters or our servants</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Discover the sweet virtues of a grill?</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e6090"><pb n="51" TEIform="pb" id="d64e6091"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Bogan Scrub.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, come with me to the Bogan, boys,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To the Bogan far away,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Where they cut the scrub for their daily grub</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With a tooral-looral-lay!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">With a tooral-looral-lay, my lads,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a whack-fol-lary-o!</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And we'll open a club on the Bogan scrub</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the struggle-for-lifers go!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, come with me to the Bogan, boys,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To the Bogan scrub so gay,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Where our brethren toil on a hungry soil</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">At an Indian coolie's pay!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And we'll sound the fife and drum, my lads,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With a whack-fol-lary-o!</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And a rub-a-dub-dub for the Bogan scrub</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the struggle-for-lifers go!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">For the damper's tough on the Bogan, boys,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the beef's as hard as rocks,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And the bull-dog ants get into your pants</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And eat your Sunday socks!</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">No sinful pleasure is there, my lads,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">No wickedness there you know;</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">For there's never a pub. on the Bogan scrub</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the struggle-for-lifers go!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e6174"><pb n="52" TEIform="pb" id="d64e6175"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Christmas Bells.</head>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">  (A Carol.)</hi></p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">The Christmas Bells of the olden land clang out on the frosty air!</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">The snow lies deep and the owlets sleep in the oak-boughs gaunt and bare.</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Our old friend Rob, with a tuneful sob in his welcoming Christmas trill,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Finds new-born zest in his crimson breast as he stands on the window sill.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">He taps and taps on the pane, perhaps, and his eye has a trace of scorn,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">As he seems to say in his wilful way: “Get up! It is Christmas morn!”</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">The wind blows chill o'er the snow-clad hills and the frozen lakes and fells,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">But hearts grow warm in the wintry storm at the sound of the Christmas Bells!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">So merrily clang the Christmas Bells!</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">The Christmas Bells!</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">The Christmas Bells!</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">The snow-clad hills and frozen fells</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Re-echo the welcome warning.</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">The silvery sound a story tells,</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">A story tells,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">A story tells,</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Of sweet good-will when the Christmas Bells</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Ring out on the Christmas morning!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">The Christmas Bells of the golden land ring clear on the balmy air,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">In the morning gray of a glorious day in a land that is bright and fair;</l></lg>
<pb n="53" TEIform="pb" id="d64e6249"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">The rising sun on the mountain's brow is sending his beams afar,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">Far over the hue of the azure blue to the wane of the morning star;</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And the sunbeams bear on the morning air, when the clang of the bells rings sharp,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">Sweet sounds as soft as the winds that waft through the strings of the golden harp;</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">In the laughing gleam of the mountain stream 't is borne to the flowery dells,</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">And the bush birds list in their sylvan tryst to the sound of the Christmas Bells!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">So cheerily ring the Christmas Bells!</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">The Christmas Bells!</l>
<l n="29" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">The Christmas Bells!</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">The listening buds in flowery dells</l>
<l n="31" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Repeat the welcome warning.</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">The silvery sound a story tells,</l>
<l n="33" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">A story tells,</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">A story tells,</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">Of sweet good-will when the Christmas Bells</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Ring out on the Christmas morning!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e6303"><pb n="54" TEIform="pb" id="d64e6304"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Mealy Mary Ann.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Some five-and-thirty years ago</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There was a sweet young man</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Whom everybody used to know</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As Mealy Mary Ann!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">He always did as young men should,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Do wrong he neither could nor would,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">He was so absolutely good,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was Mealy Mary Ann!</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Mealy Mary</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Chic and chary,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">(Suit a ladies seminary)</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Airy fairy</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Mealy Mary</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Mealy Mary Ann!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">He was so very meek and mild</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He should have used a fan,</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">As simple as a gentle child</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was Mealy Mary Ann!</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">He shuddered when he heard a D!</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Drank nothing stronger than his tea,</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And grieved how sinful men could be,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Did Mealy Mary Ann!</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Mealy Mary</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Anti-sweary</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Saintliness extraordinary,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Scary wary</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Mealy Mary</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Mealy Mary Ann!</l></lg>
<pb n="55" TEIform="pb" id="d64e6398"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">Our modern youths they live, somehow,</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On quite a different plan;</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">We have n't got such angels now</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As Mealy Mary Ann!</l>
<l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">For search the country far and wide</l>
<l n="34" part="N" TEIform="l">From Queensland to Victoria side,</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">No single soul can you provide</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Like Mealy Mary Ann!</l>
<l n="37" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Mealy Mary—</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Secretary,</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">Write his mild obituary.</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Airy fairy</l>
<l n="41" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Mealy Mary</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Mealy Mary Ann!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e6447"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Alas!</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">We've read of it in rhymes, alas!</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">We've seen it many times, alas!</l>
<l n="3" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And bards have sung</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">In every tongue</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">In warm and frigid climes, alas!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And every one has read, alas!</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">The phrase that makes our head—alas!</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">But never met</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">A person yet</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Who ever really <hi TEIform="hi">said</hi> “Alas!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e6487"><pb n="56" TEIform="pb" id="d64e6488"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Simple Chinese Plan.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Sun Yet Sun (or “the Cold-baked bun”)</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was a Knight of the Green Cockchafer,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Lord No-go of the Hoang-ho</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the golden streams of the Yang-tse flow</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And they cut men's throats for a dollar or so,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And your life might be much safer.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">To Hoang-ho no papers go,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">No Curnows, Brients, or Stronachs;</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">But the Mandarins sat on the banks o' the stream</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And they fished for trout and they fished for bream</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And they also fished for an artful scheme</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To be done with the Manchu monarchs!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Now Sun Yet Sun was the principal one,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the chief of the secret order;</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And he heard one day that the great Hung Li</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Had sworn to hang him high and dry,</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And he did n't stand round to argue why,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But he went like a deer for the border!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And Sun Yet Sun he sailed like fun</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To the lovely land of Britain;</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Where a flag has waved a thousand years,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Jingoes jeer at Russian bears,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And the heavy father hourly swears</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">By the stuff the <hi TEIform="hi">Times</hi> has written.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">And he walked with grace down Portland Place</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">By the new Chinese Legation,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">But the Manchu menials gave one grin</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">As they stepped them forth and gathered him in;</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">And the headsman's yard at Ti-ent-sin</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was the place of <hi TEIform="hi">his</hi> destination!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e6595"><pb n="57" TEIform="pb" id="d64e6596"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Postman.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">It is morning in the country and the postman's at the gate</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">With his letters and his packets, and he has no time to wait.</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">“Post!” he calls, to give you warning, and you start and stop your yawning</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">In the country, in the morning when the postman's at the gate.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And the country maiden blushes, for the envelope is pink;</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And there's someone gone to Sydney, and you need n't stop to think,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And the country maiden blushes; for the envelope she rushes,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">And she giggles and she gushes when the postman's at the gate!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">It is morning in the country and the postman's at the gate,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And a worried woman hurries for the letter that is late;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">For her husband is a drover and he's always been a rover</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And he takes the cattle over for the Bungebah estate;</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And there lately came a rumour he was injured on the track,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And her hand it shakes and trembles—for the envelope is black.</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">The suspense is overbearing—now the envelope she's tearing—</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">And she gives a cry despairing—and the postman's at the gate!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">It is morning in the country and the postman's at the gate.</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">On the messages he carries does he ever speculate?</l>
<pb n="58" TEIform="pb" id="d64e6659"/>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">On the sorrow and the sadness, on the goodness and the badness,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">On the happiness and gladness, on the love and on the hate?</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">He's the oracle of fortune, he's the Delphic up-to-date,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">He's the mystic modern Mercury, the harbinger of fate;</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a jarred and jangled chorus are the fates that hover o'er us,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">And we know not what's before us when the postman's at the gate!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e6681"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Small Boy's Whistle.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">We can listen to the clatter of the clanging printing press,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">And the rattle of the watercart we feel inclined to bless;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Though the bullocky's a-cursing and a-cracking of his whip</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">We can sling 'em out the copy and we never miss a slip;</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And the banging and the thumping of the battery we find</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Rather helpful to the motion of the literary mind;</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">In fact, we've no objection to a noise of any kind—</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But we cannot stand a small boy's whistle!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, it splits in little pieces the idea you have caught,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And it rends the thread of argument and snaps the train of thought;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">It contracts the thinking faculties, the intellect it dims,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And it makes you write anathemas instead of writing hymns!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">It's the wickedest, the horridest, the vilest kind of noise,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And the chiefest way the Evil One makes use of little boys;</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Every charitable sentiment it utterly destroys,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Does the piping of the small boy's whistle!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e6738"><pb n="59" TEIform="pb" id="d64e6739"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Looming Invasion.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">The threatening fatality,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">The coming nationality,</l>
<l n="3" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Lo, the Indian!</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Ho, the Syrian!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">The Syriac identities,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">The copper-colored entities,</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Lo, the Indian!</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Ho, the Syrian!</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Selling little trifles at the cottage garden gate,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Looking very simple to the local estimate,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Threatening the nation with the Nemesis of fate,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Lo, the Indian!</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Ho, the Syrian!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">The deluge of the Asian,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">The swamp of the Caucasian,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Lo, the Indian!</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Ho, the Syrian!</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">The dark and looming verity,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">The menace of posterity,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Lo, the Indian!</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Ho, the Syrian!</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">Coming in their dozens and their companies and scores,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Coming like a cloud upon the bright and sunny shores,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">Not a statesman watching for the danger at the doors,</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Lo, the Indian!</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Ho, the Syrian!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e6828"><pb n="60" TEIform="pb" id="d64e6829"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">When The Comps. Are Callin'!</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, it's nice to be an editor, it's beautiful, indeed,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the comps. for the copy are a-callin'!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">When there is n't any matter and there is n't any screed,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the comps. for the copy are a-callin'!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">When you're collaring an article on “how to build a barn”</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">There is some one sure to come along to have a little yarn,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And he will not care a button for a “damme” or a “darn,”</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the comps. for the copy are a-callin'!</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">When the comps. are a-callin' for the copy,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">For the copy!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">When the comps. are a-yellin' and a-bawlin',</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And there is n't any ready</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">You had better take it steady,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">When the comps. for the copy are a-callin'!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, the soul is full of happiness, the heart is full of cheer,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the comps. for the copy are a-callin'!</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And there's six o' them for primer, and there's seven for brevier,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the comps. for the copy are a-callin'!</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, the pen it may be mightier with men entirely great</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Than the sword, as all the copybooks unanimously state,</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">But the good old office scissors is the weapon up-to-date</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the comps. for the copy are a-callin'!</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">When the comps. are a-callin' for the copy,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">For the copy!</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">When the comps. are a-yellin' and a-bawlin'!</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Take it gently, never flurry,</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">It'll never do to worry,</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">When the comps. for the copy are a-callin'!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e6925"><pb n="61" TEIform="pb" id="d64e6926"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Moral Of Trilby.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There was a loon who loved a lass—</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">His name was Little Billee;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">A goodly simple sort of ass</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As virtuous as silly!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">But Trilby, she was not the maid</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You'd seriously embarrass—</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">As pure as any painted jade</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That walked the streets of Paris.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Yet Trilby's face was “wistful sweet,”</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And Trilby's eyes appealing,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And Trilby's alabaster feet</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Inspired poetic feeling!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">She loved to show her legs and arms,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Nor cared a button whether</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">The world beheld her dazzling charms</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When in “the altogether.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And Taffy he loved Trilby too</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When first he looked upon her</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">(A man of large proportions who</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Resembled batsman Bonnor).</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">The other painter was the Laird,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Considerably shorter;</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">A studio the party shared</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Within the Latin Quarter.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">They all loved Trilby, every one.</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Although she was a model,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">Her soft sweet eyes had quite undone</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The virtuous molly-coddle;</l>
<pb n="62" TEIform="pb" id="d64e7021"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">And she loved little Billee—so,</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Without much extra parley,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">She took as partner in the show</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A demon named Svengali!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">Now Trilby had a lovely voice,</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Voluminous, sonorous,</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">'T would make Sir Michael's heart rejoice</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To hear it in the chorus;</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">But Trilby's ear ('t was easily seen)</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was not attuned too highly—</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">She could not tell “God Save the Queen”</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">From “O Me—olly Riley!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">Svengali taught her how to sing,</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He hypnotised the lady;</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">His course of action was a thing</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Unquestionably shady;</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">And Trilby she became the rage,</l>
<l n="46" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To Patti's aggravation,</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">While Madame Melba left the stage</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In sheer exasperation.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="49" part="N" TEIform="l">And then Svengali went and died</l>
<l n="50" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And Trilby she died after,</l>
<l n="51" part="N" TEIform="l">And Billee died and Taffy cried</l>
<l n="52" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And there was no more laughter;</l>
<l n="53" part="N" TEIform="l">And then the reader heaved a sigh</l>
<l n="54" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You'd hear from France to Britain,</l>
<l n="55" part="N" TEIform="l">And soon began to wonder why</l>
<l n="56" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The book was ever written.</l></lg>
<pb n="63" TEIform="pb" id="d64e7115"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="57" part="N" TEIform="l">A Frenchman read the book, and he's</l>
<l n="58" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Decidedly elated,</l>
<l n="59" part="N" TEIform="l">Yet thinks the English passages</l>
<l n="60" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Had better been translated!</l>
<l n="61" part="N" TEIform="l">But we Australians have to show</l>
<l n="62" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Our minds are elevated,</l>
<l n="63" part="N" TEIform="l">And also let each other know</l>
<l n="64" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">How well we're educated!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="65" part="N" TEIform="l">And so we go to Samuel Simms</l>
<l n="66" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Enquiring after Trilby:</l>
<l n="67" part="N" TEIform="l">“Not in!”—the catalogue he skims—</l>
<l n="68" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“And do n't know when it will be.”</l>
<l n="69" part="N" TEIform="l">And when we spy it on the shelves</l>
<l n="70" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">We straightaway demand it,</l>
<l n="71" part="N" TEIform="l">And afterwards persuade ourselves</l>
<l n="72" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">We really understand it!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="73" part="N" TEIform="l">And humbug rules the social game</l>
<l n="74" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In other things than reading;</l>
<l n="75" part="N" TEIform="l">In music, art, it's all the same,</l>
<l n="76" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">We want to show “good breeding.”</l>
<l n="77" part="N" TEIform="l">So lying standards are evoked</l>
<l n="78" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And deference is shown 'em,</l>
<l n="79" part="N" TEIform="l">Our real opinions must be choked—</l>
<l n="80" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For we're afraid to own 'em!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e7197"><pb n="64" TEIform="pb" id="d64e7198"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Smithville Tandem Bike.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Now Henry Jones and William Brown</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Were built as nature planned 'em,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Although the swells in Smithville town</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Perpetually banned 'em.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">They'd long been chums in fights and frays,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Together “on the burst” for days,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And when they got the cycling craze,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of course they bought a tandem!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">But tandem bikes, though right enough</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For those who understand 'em,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Are very apt to cut up rough</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On folks who ride at random;</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">When Brown desired to take the right,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">Jones screwed to left with all his might,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And then they'd start to swear and fight</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">While riding on the tandem!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And Jones would swear that Brown was bound</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Upon the road to land 'em,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And all the people standing round</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A pair of fools would brand 'em.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Some twenty miles they went in rain</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">When Brown got off and took the train,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And Jones was left and tried in vain</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Himself to ride the tandem!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">He tried the front and hinder seat,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But Jones could not command 'em,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">With observations choice and sweet</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He swore he could n't stand 'em.</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">Next day the folks who saw the start</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">Saw Mr. Henry Jones the smart</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">Returning in a horse and cart—</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A-bringing back the tandem!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e7307"><pb n="65" TEIform="pb" id="d64e7308"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Fast!</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">The sails filled out from stem to stern</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And strained the creaking mast,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">The vessel flew the crested waves</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For she was very fast!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">The Captain feared the try-sail boom</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Might go before the blast,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">“It cannot move,” the bo'sun cried,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“For we have made it fast!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was on the stand at Randwick</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With the horses rushing past,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">But Wallace beat them easily</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For he was very fast!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And though it rained, the girl in print</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She did not stand aghast,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">The colors could not run because</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She knew that they were fast!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And so she walked before the stand</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">All smiling to the last,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">But other women frowned and said</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That she was very fast!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Joe Brown he was a glutton and</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">His appetite was vast,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">He ate and drank from morn till night,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">His life was very fast!</l></lg>
<pb n="66" TEIform="pb" id="d64e7391"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">But Joseph's brother Thomas in</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A different mould was cast,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">And 'stead of over-eating was</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Too much inclined to fast!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">'T is thus our lovely language turns</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And twists from first to last,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">And yet we wonder Frenchmen don't</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Learn English very fast!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e7420"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Clay And China.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There lived a dainty maiden</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On the Ho-hang-ho!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And her heart was heavy-laden</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For her lover went to Aden</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And he left the dainty maiden</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On the Ho-hang-ho!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">But there came a Yankee lover</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">From the O-hi-O,</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Yet she managed to discover</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That he thought himself above her,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Did the clever Yankee lover</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">From the O-hi-o!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">But she thought the people finer</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On the Ho-hang-ho!</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Her retort it was a shiner,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">“Both were clay, but she was China,</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">So the people must be finer</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On the Ho-hang-ho!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e7482"><pb n="67" TEIform="pb" id="d64e7483"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Man And The Paper.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Now William Jinks he kept a shop</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">At Bungville-on-the-Rise,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And though he saw his business drop</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He would not advertise.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">He told the local paper-man</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who dropped a gentle hint,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">He thought it was a useless plan</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To put his name in print.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">“And if my name were in the <hi TEIform="hi">Skit</hi>,”</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Said William Jinks the wise,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">“D 'ye think that folks would notice it?</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">No, I won't advertise!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">But William Jinks went out one night</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To have a glass of ale,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And got so very, very tight</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They waltzed him off to jail!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Next morning to the <hi TEIform="hi">Skit</hi> he ran</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And cried with tears of shame,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">“Do n't mention my affair, old man!</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Please do not print my name,</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Or everyone will know, methinks,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">My conduct most unwise!”</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">These were the words of William Jinks</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who would not advertise!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e7573"><pb n="68" TEIform="pb" id="d64e7574"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Alas And Alackaday.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the Princess Ransikansi</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Loved the Rajah Jamsetjee,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">She was pretty as a pansy</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And was beautiful to see.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">With her form so lithe and dashing</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And her dark brown eyes aflashing</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Did she set herself to mashing</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of the Rajah Jamsetjee!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Now the Princess she was wealthy</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">While the Rajah he was poor,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Yet was handsome, strong, and healthy,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">What could maiden wish for more?</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Though her pa (whose consort led him)</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">Much desirèd to behead him</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">She protested she would wed him</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And she swore a wicked swore!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">So the Princess got the Rajah,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(For, of course, she had her way),</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And her income it was larger</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Than a shorthand writer's pay!</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And when first their troth was plighted</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">How the Rajah blatherskited!</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And exclaimed in tones delighted,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Oh, a lass and a lakh a day!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e7658"><pb n="69" TEIform="pb" id="d64e7659"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">What Do You Want?</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">What do you want with lots of loot,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">What do you want with more?</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">In gaining millions what does it boot</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">An already abundant store?</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">The happiest man alive is he</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With a plain though ample fare,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">A humble cot and a lowly lot</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a heart that's free from care.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">You can't have everything, you know,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a natural law provides</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">The more your worldly fortunes grow</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You get more care besides;</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And some rich men have a miser's soul,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And out of a boundless store</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Get far less joy than the poor little boy</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who's given a brand new taw.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And some rich men have a son that roams</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In fields that the wise condemn;</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And some are rich, but have childless homes,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And what is their wealth to them?</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">For the lasting love of a kindred heart</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the pleasure that comes of health,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And the calm we find in a peaceful mind</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Are not to be bought by wealth!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">And happiness cannot be bought at all,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Beyond all price or charge,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">Your share may be large if your wealth is small,</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And small though your wealth be large.</l>
<pb n="70" TEIform="pb" id="d64e7754"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">So rest content if your fate should send</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A plain but an ample fare,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">And a humble cot and a lowly lot</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a heart that's free from care!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e7770"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Our Dog Jim.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">We own a dog, his name is Jim,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">And nobody gets the best of him.</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">One day when walking down the town,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">The dog was kicked by Jenkins Brown.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Jim made no fuss, but he was riled,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Although he merely looked and smiled.</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Now when the policeman came around</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Our Jim was nowhere to be found.</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">“Had we a dog, and pay the cost?”</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">We said our dog was lately lost.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And so the policeman went away</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And called on Jenkins Brown next day.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">“Had he a dog?” He swore he'd not</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">When Jim appeared upon the spot</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And jumped around and licked his hand</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">To let the policeman understand.</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">When Jim saw Brown had paid the fine</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">He came back home with us to dine.</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">That's how we saved our half-a-crown</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">And Jim got level with Jenkins Brown!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e7839"><pb n="71" TEIform="pb" id="d64e7840"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Maloni Evolution.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">When Mary Ann Malony kept the pub. at Baker's Flat</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">She was fair and she was forty, she was also fairly fat,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And she went in all the mining specs. and knew what she was at,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">You could n't fool her easily, make no mistake of <hi TEIform="hi">that!</hi></l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">She was quite a business woman and her head was very clear,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">She could doctor all the whiskey and could water down the beer,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">For there were no flies on Mary—oh, she was, that's very clear,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Quite a genius, was Mary Ann Malony!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">When the Baker's Flat Extended struck a lode of gossan ore</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">That was going twenty ounces to the bucketful, or more,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">There were thirty shares among them—the Malony held a score,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And she sold and made a fortune that she never had before.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Then she toddled off to Europe and she did the Contin-ong,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And she settled down in Paris where she came it very strong,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And the leaders of society frequented the salong</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Of the noble-minded Baroness Maloni!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And when Patherick Malony, who was husband of the same,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">Raised a steerage fare to Europe for to stop the little game,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">He concluded he could cover her with paralysing shame,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">But when he arrived at Paris he was feeling pretty tame.</l>
<pb n="72" TEIform="pb" id="d64e7911"/>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">For she told him she would gaol him if he did n't get out o' that,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">And she'd never even heard of such a place as Baker's Flat,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">She could prove she was a genuine Italian aristocrat,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">And her title was the Baroness Maloni!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e7927"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Two Hypocrites.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There were two hypocrites.</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">And one, he taught in Sunday School,</l>
<l n="3" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And wore a peaceful smile,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">In worldly ways he was a fool (?)</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">His heart was free from guile (??)</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">He turned his eyes up to the skies</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In sorrow for the sin</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Of neighbours who were worldly wise;</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But what had he within?</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">A heart well suited for a ghoul,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">A covetous, mean and envious soul!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There were <hi TEIform="hi">two</hi> hypocrites.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And one, he gambled, drank and swore,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And sneered at love and faith;</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">On earlier days he closed the door</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And shut out Memory's wraith.</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">He joined the loud blaspheming crowd</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Their coarse applause to win,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And smiled as to his wit they bowed.</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But what had he within?</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">A heart where faith and love lay hid</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">And loathed and scorned the things he did!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e8005"><pb n="73" TEIform="pb" id="d64e8006"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">What Is Luck?</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There was once a brace of brothers,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">One was Jim and one was Dick.</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Dick was careful of the coppers</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And to what he got he'd stick.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Jim was quite a different nature—</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Just a reckless sort of chap</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Who would squander every penny</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And would never care a rap.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Jim would swear and he would gamble,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">People used to say he “drank,”</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Dick was saving up the shillings</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Which he put into the bank.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">He'd a tidy sum at credit</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In what <hi TEIform="hi">he</hi> considered cash,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And he never knew the difference</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Till the bank at last went smash.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Jim just then had bought a ticket</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In a consultation sweep,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Had the luck to draw a starter</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Which the “books” held pretty cheap.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">He was quite a rank outsider,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Could n't race a collie pup,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Had no blessed show whatever—</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But he won the Melbourne Cup!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Dick was feeling quite disheartened,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Thought he'd have to give it best;</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">Jim had started with his fortune</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On a champagne-wrestling test.</l>
<pb n="74" TEIform="pb" id="d64e8104"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">In a year the bank re-opened,</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Dick was on his feet again,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">While his brother Jim was camping</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the breezy old Domain!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">There is luck and there is fortune,</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There is chance—there is, begad!</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">But some men can't do with good luck</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">What some others do with bad.</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">And the only luck worth having's</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To be born with energy</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">That will make the best of all things.</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And will graft continuously!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e8147"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">A Genuine Bush Song.</head>
<p TEIform="p">[To be sung slowly to any tune or no tune at all.]</p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Now come along, ye drover lads,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Ye drover lads so gay,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">For we must take a mob of prads</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To Carpen-tary-<hi TEIform="hi">a</hi>!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">We'll take across a thousand head</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And tramp it wide and fur,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">The stock's consigned to Carrotty Ned</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On Carpen-tary-her!</l></lg>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Chorus:</hi></p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">So it's saddle up your horses, blokes,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Across the bush we go,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Inside a week at Spencer's Creek</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">We're bound to be, yer know,</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And the damper ain't too stinkin',</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the beef is middlin', so</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">We'll be 'cross the Queensland border in the mor-nin'!</l></lg>
<pb n="75" TEIform="pb" id="d64e8210"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, a drover's life is jolly and</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A drover's life is free,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">So it's fill yer glass with Swanky's brand,</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And have a beer with me!</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">For we'll soon be back to Melbourne, where</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The boys can breast the bar,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">And we all have lots of cash to spare</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">From Carpen-tary-<hi TEIform="hi">ar</hi>!</l></lg>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Chorus:</hi></p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">So it's saddle up your horses, blokes,</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Across the bush we go,</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the rippling Diamantina</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Doth occasionally flow.</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">There is “posts and rails” and “brownie”</l>
<l n="29" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For yer breakfast now, yer know,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">And we're bound to cross the border in the mor-nin'!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">Now the city coves in Sydney they're</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A cunnin' sort of push,</l>
<l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">And the songs they write is pretty fair</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Concernin' of the bush;</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">But you bet your socks and bluchers it</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Would not appear so gay,</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">If they took a mob of horses out</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To Carpen-tary-<hi TEIform="hi">a!</hi></l></lg>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Chorus:</hi></p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">So it's saddle up your horses, blokes,</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Across the bush we go,</l>
<l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">We're agoin' to where the niggers and</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The alligators grow.</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the rum is worse than poison</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the snakes are lying low,</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">And we're goin' to cross the border in the mor-nin!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e8326"><pb n="76" TEIform="pb" id="d64e8327"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Pendulum.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Here's a golden rule of life,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Watch the swing of the pendulum!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Weal and woe and joy and strife,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Watch the swing of the pendulum!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Always swinging to and fro,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Chances come and chances go,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Life's experience finds it so;</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Watch the swing of the pendulum!</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Up and down and to and fro,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Chances come and chances go,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Chances go and chances come,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Watch the swing of the pendulum!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Hear the people shout hurrahs,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Watch the swing of the pendulum!</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Trust ye not to loud huzzas,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Watch the swing of the pendulum!</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Groans are sure to change to cheers,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">Smiles are bound to turn to tears,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Hopes presage the looming fears,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Watch the swing of the pendulum!</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Right to left and left to right,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">Night to day and day to night,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Seasons go and seasons come,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">Watch the swing of the pendulum!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Gathering clouds are hanging low,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Watch the swing of the pendulum!</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">See the cheery sunshine glow,</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Watch the swing of the pendulum!</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">Life is sad and life is gay,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">Bright to-morrow if dark to-day,</l>
<pb n="77" TEIform="pb" id="d64e8427"/>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">What a ahead of us who can say?</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Watch the swing of the pendulum!</l>
<l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">Changes come to every door,</l>
<l n="34" part="N" TEIform="l">Poor grow rich and rich grow poor,</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">Chances go and chances come,</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Watch the swing of the pendulum!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e8449"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Oozleum.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There was an old skipper belonged to Jerusalem</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Known by the name of Mahomet Methusalem,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Jolly old sailor who captained a crewsalem</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Sailing from Joppa across to Corfusalem.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Tired of the Mediterranean Bluesalem</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Out at Gibraltar he went for a cruisealem;</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Somebody told the old seafaring Jewsalem</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Sydney was boss of the lot for a boozealem.</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Down to the southward the schooner it flewsalem</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">'Cross the equator at longitude two-salem;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Up Sydney Harbour the vessel she drewsalem.</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Once alongside old Mahomet Methusalem</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Went off ashore on a lengthened carousealem</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">Just as old sailors so frequently do-salem!</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Not very much of our liquor he knewsalem,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Several brandies and whiskies got throughsalem.</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Then it went ill with Mahomet Methusalem</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">Flattened right out by colonial fuselum;</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Head the next morning, (deplorably truesalem!)</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Swelled like a pumpkin in Woolloomooloosalem,</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">So with a shudder Mahomet Methusalem</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">Packed up his traps and went home to Jerusalem!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e8524"><pb n="78" TEIform="pb" id="d64e8525"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Mickity-Mulga Football Match.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Now the township of Mickity-Mulga,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Which lies on the bank of the Bland,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Is entirely surrounded by cockies</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who are rough in the speech and the hand;</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And there's pretty rough coves in the village,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And you can't pick on one for a tug,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">But the biggest and roughest, the strongest and toughest's</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A bloke they call Billy the Pug.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">There's a pub out at Mickity-Mulga</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(And there used to be one or two more</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">'Fore the traffic was killed by the railway),</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a goodish-sized general store;</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And a butcher shop, too, and a smithy,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the business is still pretty snug,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">For a man as can graft at a shoe or a shaft,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the blacksmith is Billy the Pug.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">He has shoulders as wide as a giant's,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He is over six feet as he stands,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And he'd make yer sing out “lemme go, Bill,”</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With his grip as he went to shake hands;</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And the coves from out back who'd been shearing,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Did n't challenge the crowd for a plug,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Even Slogger McGee was polite as could be</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the presence of Billy the Pug!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Now some ten miles from Mickity-Mulga</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There's a town they call Johnsonville, and</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">It considered, regarding of football,</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">It could lick anything on the Bland.</l>
<pb n="79" TEIform="pb" id="d64e8620"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">But the blokes out at Mickity-Mulga</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Had defeated the chaps at the Scrub,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">So the schoolmaster wrote a polite little note</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For to challenge the Johnsonville club.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, the challenge of course was accepted</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">By the Johnsonville chaps, who would take</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">A trip out and play 'em at Mulga,</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Which is just when they made the mistake!</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Johnsonville chaps brought an umpire,</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who was small, though a very big bug,</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">But the Mickity crew said they wanted one too,</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And their umpire'd be Billy the Pug.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">So they started with four bound'ry umpires,</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And with two in the centre as well;</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Johnsonville team had the science,</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And their hearts were as sound as a bell;</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">But the other blokes' size was enormous,</l>
<l n="46" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And you should have seen Johnsonville's mug</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">And the look of surprise in the Johnsonville eyes</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">At the rulings of Billy the Pug!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="49" part="N" TEIform="l">For the <hi TEIform="hi">other</hi> umpire was n't in it;</l>
<l n="50" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He, no doubt, was a judge of the game,</l>
<l n="51" part="N" TEIform="l">But if Billy decided it one way,</l>
<l n="52" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Why, the Johnsonville bloke did the same;</l>
<l n="53" part="N" TEIform="l">And the free kicks for Mickity-Mulga,</l>
<l n="54" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You can bet they were frequent, of course,</l>
<l n="55" part="N" TEIform="l">But the champion trick was when Carrotty Mick</l>
<l n="56" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was awarded three points for a force!</l></lg>
<pb n="80" TEIform="pb" id="d64e8717"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="57" part="N" TEIform="l">Billy said he had not had much practice,</l>
<l n="58" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But he thought he'd get on pretty right,</l>
<l n="59" part="N" TEIform="l">And on Johnsonville notions of Rugby</l>
<l n="60" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Bill threw quite a different light;</l>
<l n="61" part="N" TEIform="l">If a Johnsonville cove got the leather</l>
<l n="62" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And got clean through the lot like a plum,</l>
<l n="63" part="N" TEIform="l">You would hear Billy blow on the whistle, you know,</l>
<l n="64" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And they'd have to come back for a scrum!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="65" part="N" TEIform="l">And if anyone grumbled, why, Billy</l>
<l n="66" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Would ask what they grumbled about;</l>
<l n="67" part="N" TEIform="l">When the other umpire said the very same thing</l>
<l n="68" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">How could anyone have any doubt?</l>
<l n="69" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, he might n't know much about football,</l>
<l n="70" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And at points he perhaps was a mug,</l>
<l n="71" part="N" TEIform="l">But the Johnsonville best was n't game to contest</l>
<l n="72" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The decisions of Billy the Pug!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="73" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, of course, it was Mickity-Mulga</l>
<l n="74" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That won the great battle that day,</l>
<l n="75" part="N" TEIform="l">And the score it was thirteen to nothing</l>
<l n="76" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the game it was what you'd call gay;</l>
<l n="77" part="N" TEIform="l">And they had a great supper that evening</l>
<l n="78" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And exclaimed, as they passed round the jug,</l>
<l n="79" part="N" TEIform="l">And they tackled the grub of the Mickity club,</l>
<l n="80" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Here's good fortune to Billy the Pug!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e8799"><pb n="81" TEIform="pb" id="d64e8800"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Olden Golden Days.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, some may sing of the olden days,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of the days of long ago!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">When the noble knight in his armour bright</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Went forth to meet the foe.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And some may sing of the tournaments,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And some find pæans of praise</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">For the songs they sung when the earth was young</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the olden golden days!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">But I will sing of the peasant's hut</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And his earthen floor, a bog,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And his couch of straw and a bone to gnaw</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Like a Nineteenth Century dog!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And the coarse rough cloak and the unkempt hair</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the dull and vacuous gaze,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And the fetid smell from an earthly hell</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the olden golden days!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And some may sing of the Castle halls</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the palaces rich and great,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And the gems that glow on the royal brow,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As the monarch sits in state;</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And the amber wine, and the kingly fare,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Yule-log's roaring blaze,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And the martial toasts of the knightly hosts</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the olden golden days!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">But I will sing of the junks of meat</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They flung on the marble floor,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">While smoke, like fog, from a smouldering log</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Went out at the open door.</l></lg>
<pb n="82" TEIform="pb" id="d64e8896"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">And I will sing of the loathsome jests</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the gross and brutal lays</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">The harper sang to the swinish gang</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the olden golden days!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">And some may sing of the lovely maids</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the courtly gentle dames,</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">When smiles delight the favourite knight,</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Contending at manly games—</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">The courtly dames who clawed raw meat</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And laughed at a lecher's gaze,</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">And swore like men in a boozing ken</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the olden golden days!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">But I will sing of the modern time</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the wonders of the hour;</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">Of the Zigzag ridge and the Brooklyn bridge</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the lofty Eiffel tower;</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">And the wire that carries around the earth</l>
<l n="46" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">What mankind thinks and says—</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, <hi TEIform="hi">what</hi> would they say to the Röntgen ray</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the olden golden days?</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="49" part="N" TEIform="l">And some may sing of the charioteer,</l>
<l n="50" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But I of the Pullman car,</l>
<l n="51" part="N" TEIform="l">Or the flying wheel and the joy you feel</l>
<l n="52" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With a grip of the handle-bar!</l>
<l n="53" part="N" TEIform="l">And some may sing of the lantern's glare,</l>
<l n="54" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But I of the 'lectric rays.</l>
<l n="55" part="N" TEIform="l">They'd jump with fright at the Edison light</l>
<l n="56" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the olden golden days!</l></lg>
<pb n="83" TEIform="pb" id="d64e8992"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="57" part="N" TEIform="l">Who please may sing of the knights and squires</l>
<l n="58" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the glittering helms of gold,</l>
<l n="59" part="N" TEIform="l">And the prancing steeds and the daring deeds</l>
<l n="60" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the brave old days of old;</l>
<l n="61" part="N" TEIform="l">But I'm not gone on the old romance,</l>
<l n="62" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For a close survey betrays</l>
<l n="63" part="N" TEIform="l">They tell us a lot of ridiculous rot</l>
<l n="64" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of the olden golden days!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e9022"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Romance And Reality.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">A teardrop, like the sparkling dew</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Upon the fragrant violet,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Stood in her eye so sweetly blue,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Whose soulful depths of azure hue</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Showed much of gentle sadness yet.</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">The teardrop sparkled like the dew</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Upon the fragrant violet!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">The teardrops, if like sparkling dew,</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Most certainly were funny'uns,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Her eyes were rather red than blue</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And blinking when she looked at you,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For she was peeling onions;</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And chilblains she had got a few,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And unpoetic bunions!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e9073"><pb n="84" TEIform="pb" id="d64e9074"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Cruellest Cut.</head>
<p TEIform="p">In publishing the names of officers to be retained in the N.S.W. Public Service the Board added also the salary received. Whence the following:—</p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a dandy, such a grandee!</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a nice young man!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a “soda-please-and-brandy”</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a smart young man!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a wake-and-call-me-early</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a kiss-me-little-girly</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a scented, such a curly,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a sweet young man!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And how marvellous his nerve is!</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a bold young man!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">He is in the Civil Service,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a neat young man!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And it consequently follers</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">From his Tower-of-Babel collars</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">That he's got a lot of dollars,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a rich young man!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">He is tailored to perfection,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a grand young man!</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And his chain will bear inspection,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a true young man!</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And his vest is double-breasted</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">And his collar-stud is crested</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And he's very narrow-chested,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a pale young man!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">And the truth was never hinted</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of the bright young man!</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">Till the list of screws was printed—</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a sad young man!</l>
<pb n="85" TEIform="pb" id="d64e9173"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">For the dandy of the frillings</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">And the cooings and the billings</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">Had a screw of forty shillings,</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">What a wild young man!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e9190"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Scorching.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">A certain Old Gentleman sat by the fire</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In a Place that we none of us name,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And called to the stokers to blandly enquire</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">How the biker on earth with the pneumatic tyre</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Got along with the pedalling game.</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(The same Was a highly enjoyable game!)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And the wily Old Gentleman went to an elf</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who was making a torch in the porch,</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Said the elf, “Well, I can't say I've seen it myself,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But they say from the poorest right up to the Guelph</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">They are all of 'em learning to scorch—This torch</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Ain't a thing to the way they can scorch!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Then the wily Old Gentleman smiled him a smole</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he leered him a horrible leer,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And he said, “It would really appear on the whole</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That these folks are prepared for a subsequent rôle—</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">There'll be plenty of scorching down here, I fear,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There'll be plenty of scorching down here!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e9252"><pb n="86" TEIform="pb" id="d64e9253"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">When Matilda Hangs The Washing On The Line.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Though our general existence is a dull and weary waste</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Of the clicking of the scissors and the splashing of the paste,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And of writing little paragraphs concerning Mr. Brown</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">And the wonderful improvements he's effected in the town;</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Though the dreary repetition and the everlasting round</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Of perpetual monotony is generally found,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">We have just one gleam of sunshine in a melancholy fate,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">When Matilda hangs the washing on the line at Number Eight!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">There are divers blooming damsels who reside at Number Eight,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And Matilda is the servant maid and sweet to contemplate;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">She has arms of alabaster and an eye of heav'nly blue,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And her hair is crisp and curly and of lovely auburn hue.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And we watch her from the window of our humble domicile</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And are frequently rewarded with a sunny little smile,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And we sometimes feel our sorrows we are apt to overrate,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">When Matilda hangs the washing on the line at Number Eight!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">When we're dashing off a leader on the European row,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">Or recording how McGinnis lost his famous milking cow,</l>
<pb n="87" TEIform="pb" id="d64e9316"/>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Or regretting the recurrence of incendiary fires,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Or constructing sundry paragraphs or “panning out the wires,”</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">We have still a lurking hopefulness for better days in store</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">With a gleam of sunshine breaking the monotony of yore,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Of a pleasure in existence, of a glimpse of earthly Heaven</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">With Matilda hanging washing on the line at Number Seven!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e9338"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Abu Ben Mahomet.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">It was Abu Ben Mahomet from Arabia the blest</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Who desired to be a Christian and who took a journey west,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And invited the professors of religion to explain</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">With that elegance of diction and that forcefulness of brain</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">For which Europe is so famous, so remarkable indeed,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">All the tenets and the doctrines of the noble Christian creed;</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And he gathered them together in a room at his hotel,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">In a town that's known as London, where the wisest people dwell.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And there was a Roman Catholic, a famous Anglican,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">A Methodist, a Baptist, and a Presbyterian,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">A Quaker and a Shaker and a Plymouth brother too,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And a dozen other clerics of most every point of view.</l>
<pb n="88" TEIform="pb" id="d64e9381"/>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">When the Baptist gave his doctrine with much eloquence and force</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">He was flatly contradicted by the Anglican, of course;</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Quaker and the Shaker used some language very strong,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Though they both agreed in stating that the Catholic was wrong!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">The United Presbyterian he ventured to suggest</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">That the doctrine of the Calvinists was better than the rest,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Which aroused the wrath and anger of the Plymouth Brother, who</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Said he thought a Presbyterian no better than a Jew!</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Now a gen'ral altercation, as most ev'rybody knows,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">Has a tendency for leading on from argument to blows,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And the meeting might have ended in a lamentable “scene”</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">Had not Abu Ben Mahomet had the wit to intervene!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">It was Abu Ben Mahomet, growing weary of his quest,</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">Sailed away again from London to Arabia the blest,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">Made a pilgrimage to Mecca and immediately swore</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">To be faithful to the Prophet and to Islam evermore!</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">And when asked of his religion in the future he would say</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">That he tried to be a Christian, but he could n't find the way,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">And he thought before their missionaries came across the sea</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">That the Christians should discover how to mutually agree!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e9449"><pb n="89" TEIform="pb" id="d64e9450"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">A Great Performance.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">It was on the Never-Never where the Jackeroos endeavour</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">To be very, very, clever with the stranger imbecile,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And the station Ananias has no compromising bias</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">But excels all other liars in his dignity and style—</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">It was there that wily William with his bosom full of guile</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Did his bike and snake performance of eleven hundred mile!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">He'd been reading up at Raper's how them bikers cut their capers</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">And according to the papers how they made their record breaks,</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And he bet he'd find the pacers for to flatten out them racers</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And he'd set 'em up some facers in about a brace o' shakes.</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And he goes and gets a dozen of the liveliest of snakes</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Such as always are located round the new artesian lakes!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And he harnessed up the creatures, with a smile upon his features—</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">Says “I'll let them Johnnies teach us how to make the bloomin' pace</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">For a driver and a drover!” and he jumps upon his Rover,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Takes the greenhide ribbons over with a cheerful smilin' face;</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And he flourishes his stockwhip with the elegance and grace</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">Of the portly Duke o' Portland in a London coaching race!</l></lg>
<pb n="90" TEIform="pb" id="d64e9511"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, he gets his team together and he starts 'em 'ell for leather</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Till he'd make yer wonder whether 't was a meteor or what.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">“Now then, Brownie! where yer haulin'! get up Diamond!” he was callin',</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">And we feared he might be fallin', but by Jingo he was not.</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And he went around the station with them pacers like a shot</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">And he busted all the records of that city cycling lot!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e9534"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Fate Of Tate.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There once was a party named Timothy Tate</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Who vowed that the world was too quick,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">The rush and the clatter bewildered his pate</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">And it made him feel dreadfully sick.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And slower and slower poor Timothy grew</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">For exertion was not to his mind,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And the faster the rest of humanity flew</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">The further poor Tim fell behind!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Poor Tim got so slow and the world got so fast,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">That he fell in a terrible plight;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">For he woke up one day in the week before last,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">With the rest of the world out of sight!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And he shouted in vain, for the world could n't hear</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">Though he kicked up a deuce of a row,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">It went on and poor Timothy dropped in the rear</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">And he's back in last century now!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e9591"><pb n="91" TEIform="pb" id="d64e9592"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Dan The Bullocky.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There are twenty shearers on the board upon the Castlereagh,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">And, without machines, they ought to shear a hundred score a day;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And the forty bales o' fleeces with the Mickity-Mulga brand</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Wait for Carrotty Dan of Coona'bran, the bullocky from the Bland!</l></lg>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Chorus:</hi></p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And it's “Way there Strawberry! yer blankity blank!” says he;</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And for depth and breadth of language which is forcible and free,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">From the Gulf away to Gippsland there's no driver in the land</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Up to Carrotty Dan of Coona'bran, the bullocky from the Bland!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">He has twenty head, and beauties, and he calls 'em all by name,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And they answer to the cursing, they are staunch and they are game;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">If he spoke in gentle language they would never understand,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">For it ain't all beer and skittles driving bullocks on the Bland</l></lg>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Chorus:</hi></p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And it's “Gee back, Diamond! yer blankity-blank and dash!”</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">“Gee out o' that saplin, Baldy!” and the whip comes down a crash.</l>
<pb n="92" TEIform="pb" id="d64e9651"/>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">“Way Nugget! Get up Blossom!” oh, he's something really grand,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Is Carrotty Dan of Coona'bran, the bullocky from the Bland!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">You should see him by the waggon when they're camping for the night,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">And the mutton's started bakin' and the fire's a-burning bright.</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">After tea he plays at euchre, and he plays a decent hand,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Does Carrotty Dan of Coona'bran, the bullocky from the Bland.</l></lg>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Chorus:</hi> And it's “Way there, etc.”</p>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e9679"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Spring, Sweet Spring!</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Now pass along the light guitar</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The minstrel wants to sing</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Of birds who greet in concert sweet</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In lovely leafy Spring.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">(But mind you shut the office door</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When you go out, my cove,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And do n't forget to bring me more</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Fresh timber for the stove.)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">The world is bright and gay, you know,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The sky is clear and bright</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">(That was a lovely fall of snow</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">We had on Sunday night!)</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">In gentle Spring Dame Nature kind</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Her lovely garb doth wear.</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">(Great Cæsar's ghost! This eastern wind</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Would freeze a Polar bear!)</l></lg>
<pb n="93" TEIform="pb" id="d64e9735"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">The glorious sun shines overhead,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The sunbeams gaily skip</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">(I hear old Brown is nearly dead</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With another dose of grippe!)</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">The golden wattle proudly blooms,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The rosebud opens out,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">(The draught that whistles through these rooms</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Would give a man the gout!)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">So let me sing of gentle Spring,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of Spring, when all is gay,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">When song-birds carol on the wing</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And balmy zephyrs play.</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">(But balmy zephyrs here I bar,</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">I just now got a whiff;</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">And please remove the light guitar—</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The strings are frozen stiff!)</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e9790"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Explains It.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">If Eve was made from Adam's rib,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And ancient tales are n't fibbin's;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Why then we have the reason glib</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Why woman dotes on ribbons!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">If Eve was dressed in leaves of fig,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The reason comes (don't snigger)</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Why woman wants in every rig</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To be a splendid figger!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e9821"><pb n="94" TEIform="pb" id="d64e9822"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Quarter-Back.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">The Mickity-Mulga quarter-back</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Was commonly known as Bandy Jack,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">He rode a sort of a circus hack</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">That clinked his shoes with a clickity-clack,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And Bandy Jack with his hair so black</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And his arms as long as a chimney-stack</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Was number one and the pick o' the pack;</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">The Mickity-Mulga quarter-back!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">The Mickity-Mulga quarter-back—</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Whatever the knowledge he chanced to lack—</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Was much more use than the Sydney crack</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">With the cleverest dodge and the smartest knack;</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">For he stopped a try with a hearty smack</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">On the side o' the jaw—and a horrible whack</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Went the Sydney crack on the broad of his back,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">When he found he was tackled by Bandy Jack!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, it was n't the game for a quarter-back,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">But nobody told him to leave the track,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">For his frame was big and his arm was slack</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">And he “would n't put up with nobody's clack;”</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">When the captain threatened to give him the sack</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">He called him a blankity-blankity quack,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And as hard as a nail and as tough as a tack</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">Was the Mickity-Mulga quarter-back!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e9905"><pb n="95" TEIform="pb" id="d64e9906"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The New Chum And The 'Possum.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, the ring-tailed 'possum on the bough one night,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">He saw that the moon was shining bright.</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Says he to himself “There's too much light</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">And I'll hide behind the blossom!”</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">But the new chum came with his bright new gun,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Says he to himself, says he, “There's one!</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Now watch me well and you'll see some fun</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">For I'm going to shoot that 'possum!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And the jackass sat on the tree near by,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And he laughed till he felt he was fit to cry</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And he said “I thinks to myself, thinks I,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">That the chap up the tree will boss him!”</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Then the new chum fired, but he got no show,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And the gun kicked back with a dreadful blow.</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">“Ho ho!” said the jackass, “ho-ho-ho!”</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">“Ha ha!” said the ring-tailed 'possum!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e9963"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Lip Tip Cat.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">A wicked little cannibal was Lip Tip Cat,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">He was fond of pickled missionary, not too fat,</l>
<l n="3" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the wicked little sinner</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Had a missionary dinner</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">He would cook it in a manner you would marvel at!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">He'd natural antipathy to cold roast goat,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And to iguana banquets gave an adverse vote.</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But his eyes would gleam with pleasure</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When he had to take the measure</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Of a plumpish little parson in a long black coat!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e10000"><pb n="96" TEIform="pb" id="d64e10001"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Three Roses.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Away in the West where the sunset is red</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">And a murmur is borne on the breeze</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Of the hum of the day and the forest birds' lay</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Through the leaves of the wilderness trees,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">There are three blooming roses as sweet as the morn</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the dew-spangled violets rest,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And the blushes are bright to the traveller's sight</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Of the roses that bloom in the West!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And the names of the roses? Sweet Mary is one—</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Ah, how kind is her lovely black eye!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">When it flashes with glee it is goodly to see,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And how soft is the sound of her sigh!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And her sister, sweet Flora the Queen of the Flowers,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">With the full dark-brown tresses we love;</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, the charm of her smile would the grimmest beguile,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">And as gentle and kind as a dove!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And sweet Nellie the third blooming rose of the West</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">Is as sweet and as kind and as fair,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">With the charm of her eyes in their simple surprise</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">And her curling luxuriant hair.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">You may search through the north, you may search through the south,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">But to me far the sweetest and best</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Are the theme of this lay—for the fairest I say</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">Are the roses that bloom in the West!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e10085"><pb n="97" TEIform="pb" id="d64e10086"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Water On The Brain.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was away in old Missouri where the blizzards blow like fury</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the foreman of the jury chews tobacco at the trial,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the wooden hams do flourish and the mush and doughnuts nourish</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the mugwumps of the parish hang a horse-thief once'n a while—</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">It was there that Boss McGritty was the Marshal of the city</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Mayor and the Committee and the great Panjander<hi TEIform="hi">am</hi>,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And he said he felt a sort o' great desire to stop the water</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(There was eighty million gallons in the dam Dam! Dam!)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">So the Mayor cut off the water and the folk were breathing slaughter</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As they washed themselves in porter and they cleaned their teeth with gin!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And the local horse-reporter paid a dollar and-a-quarter</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For a pannikin of water for to shave his little chin!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And the builder growing shorter went for rum to mix his mortar</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And his language was a snorter for the land of wooden ham!</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">But McGutty thought he oughter be most careful with the water</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With but eighty million gallons in the dam, Dam! DAM!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e10146"><pb n="98" TEIform="pb" id="d64e10147"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">“ '98.”</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who fears to speak of '98,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Whose natal day we celebr8?</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">This is the day from which we d8</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">New resolutions, good and gr8!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Henceforth our smoking shall ab8,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">The weed nicotian we shall h8.</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">We'll swear off gin and whiskey str8,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">And put no nobblers on the s18.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Our words we now will regul8</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">In phrases mild and delic8,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Such games as pool we'll design8</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">As absolutely reprob8!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Who speaks of Yankee Grab must w8</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">On other folks in '98!</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">No dominoes to enerv8</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">And cloud the mind inebri8!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, we shall not particip8</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">In sinful games in '98,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">But daily seek to elev8</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Our minds on things regener8!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">We'll go to church in solemn st8</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">Six times a week in '98,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And place our sixpence on the pl8</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">If coppers are inadequ8.</l></lg>
<pb n="99" TEIform="pb" id="d64e10230"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">This is our present estim8</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">Of virtues in the aggre8,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">We happily might effectu8</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">If man were but immacul8!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">Alas, in dread we contempl8</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">Lest '99 eventu8</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">And find us in the parlous st8</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">In which we started '98!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e10259"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Dead Sea Fruit.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the modern daily paper you will very often see</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">What appears to be a story aptly told;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And you settle down to read it as delighted as can be</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">But it very often happens you are sold;</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">For before you reach the middle of the charming little tale</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">There's an end to all anticipated thrills,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">For you find it's an advertisement for Tangleswanky's Ale</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Or for Dr. Cummin Killem's Special Pills!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And it's just the same with everything you meet with during life,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">For there's nothing that is really what it seems;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And the bright anticipations at beginning of the strife</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Are as vain as all the visions of our dreams!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">For the future in the distance looks a smiling flowery vale</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">With the golden sun a-shining on the hills,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">But you find it just as commonplace as Tangleswanky's Ale</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Or as Dr. Cummin Killem's Special Pills!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e10316"><pb n="100" TEIform="pb" id="d64e10317"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Quay!</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">A man wandered down to the Circular Quay,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">And over the beautiful harbor looked huay,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Exclaiming, “My heart, I am longing to fluay</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Far over the waves of the emerald suay,</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">The suay,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">The suay,</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">The emerald suay!</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Far over the waves of the emerald suay!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">“The love of my heart is unfaithful to muay,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">I dreamed that no mortals so happy as wuay!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, cruel, tyrannical, merciless shuay!</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">More cruel than waves of the pitiless suay,</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">The suay,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">The suay,</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">The thundering suay,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">The hissing, the foaming, tempestuous suay!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">“And now that my fortunes are all up a truay,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">The barque of my life drifting on to the luay,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">My bosom still swells with the thought that I'm fruay,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">As free as the open and rip-rippling suay,</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">The suay,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">The suay,</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">The beautiful suay,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">The leaping, the laughing, the rollicking suay!”</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">[Then he went to North Shore from the Circular Quay!]</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e10403"><pb n="101" TEIform="pb" id="d64e10404"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Bandy Pat Of Blue Gum Flat.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">I'm Bandy Pat from Blue Gum Flat,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">My age is eighty-one,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">A rouseabout's the game I'm at</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On Cambaroora Run!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">In spite of humble parentage</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A song I'm going to sing,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And tell you how I came of age</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When Sailor Bill was King!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">The world has seen a lot of change;</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of trains we did n't dream</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">When I came o'er the mountain range</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And drove a bullock team!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">We used to earn a fairish wage</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And then we'd have a fling,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">But that was when I came of age</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And Sailor Bill was King!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">We've got the trains, we have the trams,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">We have the Public Schools,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">We've lots of crams and great exams.</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To manufacture fools.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">The way the world has gone ahead</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is most bewildering,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And me at Cambaroora shed</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Since Sailor Bill was King!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">The Röntgen ray for broken bones</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">It beats me out o' sight!</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">The telegraphs, the telephones,</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The great electric light:</l>
<pb n="102" TEIform="pb" id="d64e10499"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">The women too they now engage</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In nearly everything;</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">It's happened since I came of age</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When Sailor Bill was King!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">But though the world has gone ahead,</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And wondrous things are done,</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">While I've been eating damper bread</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On Cambaroora Run,</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">There's no one yet that ever heard</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Me boast about a thing,</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">Although of course it's all occurred</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Since Sailor Bill was King!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">The Queen she gets the credit—she</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Has been upon the throne;</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">But blowed if I can quite agree</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She did it all alone!</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">She's been the Queen beyond a doubt,</l>
<l n="46" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And been a decent one,</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">But, blow me, I've been rouseabout</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On Cambaroora Run!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e10568"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Australia's Wisdom.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">In other lands the wise men and the great,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">The greatest minds, are given to rule the State;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Each seeks to make his own the ascendant star</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">And genius leads them to the verge of war.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">But mild Australia, wiser in her ken.</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">To trade and commerce gives her wisest men,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">While shiftless dolts and wealthy fools are sent</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">To play at making laws in Parliament!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e10600"><pb n="103" TEIform="pb" id="d64e10601"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Pharisee And Sadducee.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">A Pharisee and a Sadducee</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Bewailed the world's iniquity,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">The evil ways, the devil's ways,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And sin and grief's ubiquity.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">The Sadducee declared that he</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Had doubts of man's enormities;</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">The Pharisee cried “Look at me,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">My life how uniform it is!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">The Sadducee regretted he</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was of the Scribes and Pharisees,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">For grieving, moaning, groaning is</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A kind of life that harasses.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">The Sadducee began to see</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">His doctrine was a heresy,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And when he saw its patent flaw</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The Sadducee was fairer—see?</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">The Pharisee, however, he</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Immediately got mad you see;</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">He said men could be nothing good</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If they were ever glad, you see;</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And so he groaned and sighed and moaned</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That men were all so bad you see.</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">The Sadducee was fairer, see?</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The Pharisee was sad you see!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e10684"><pb n="104" TEIform="pb" id="d64e10685"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Federation.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Let us sing of Federation</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">('T is the theme of every cult)</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And the joyful expectation</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of its ultimate result.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">'T will confirm the jubilation</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Of protection's expectation,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And the quick consolidation</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Of freetrade with every nation;</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And teetotal legislation</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Will achieve its consummation</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And increase our concentration</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">On the art of bibulation.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">We shall drink to desperation,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And be quite the soberest nation</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">We'll be desperately loyal</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Unto everything that's royal,</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And be ultra-democratic</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">In a matter most emphatic.</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">We'll be prosperous and easeful,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">And pre-eminently peaceful,</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And we'll take our proper station</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">As a military nation!</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">We shall show the throne affection,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">Also sever the connection,</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">And the bonds will get no fainter</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">And we'll also cut the painter.</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">We'll proclaim with lute and tabor</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">The millennium of labour,</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">And we'll bow before the gammon</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">Of plutocracy and Mammon.</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">We'll adopt all fads and fictions</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">And their mass of contradictions</l>
<pb n="105" TEIform="pb" id="d64e10791"/>
<l n="33" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If all hopes are consummated</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When Australia's federated;</l>
<l n="35" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For the Federation speeches</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">This one solid moral teach us—</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">That a pile of paradoxes are expected to result!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e10810"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Queen Wilhelmina And The Bicycle</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Away down in Holland by the silent Zuyder Zee</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Lives a curly, comely maiden who's as sad as sad can be,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">She's the queen and regal ruler of the land of dreary dyke,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">But her ministers decided that she must n't ride a bike.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Queen Wilhelmina, she is sad, sad, sad,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">She is ropeable, she's savage, and she's mad, mad, mad!</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">No affliction could be keener</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">To the angry Wilhelmina,</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">For the statesmen say she must n't ride a bike!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">There's war down in Holland by the silent Zuyder Zee,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">For the ramping Wilhelmina has a yearning to be free,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And she'll likely be eloping if there is n't plenty care</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">With a greasy organ-grinder with a raven head of hair.</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">For the Queen Wilhelmina, she is sad, sad, sad,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And her ministers are obviously mad, mad, mad!</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">It's a great mistake they're making,</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">It's a risky undertaking,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">When you tell a girl she must n't ride a bike!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e10873"><pb n="106" TEIform="pb" id="d64e10874"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Katzenjammer.</head>
<p TEIform="p">“Katzenjammer” is a German word that is a cross between “<hi TEIform="hi">ennui</hi>” and “laziness.” It signifies a general disinclination to get up and hustle.</p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Dere vos a man, I knows him vell,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He casts some kind of glamour</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">He shpeaks so nice I don't could tell</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">How shplendid vos his grammar.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">At talking he vos like a Turk</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">But sometings else he like to shirk,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">He alvays feels too tired to vork,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He has dot Katzenjammer!</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">He has dot Katzenjammer, zo!</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">He talks mit shplendid grammar, zo!</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">But vork he not</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Because he got</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Der grossen Katzenjammer!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">I knows a man vos alvays sick,</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For pills and tings he clamour;</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">He tinks he vants 'em mighty quick</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But don't could shtrike no hammer!</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">He could n't eat some bite or sup,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">He hates dot tea and coffee cup,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">He only vants some pick-him-up,</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He has dot Katzenjammer!</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">He has dot Katzenjammer, zo!</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">He could n't shtrike no hammer, zo!</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Dot lazy sot</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">I tinks he got</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">Der grossen Katzenjammer!</l></lg>
<pb n="107" TEIform="pb" id="d64e10968"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">I knows a man vos always sad,</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He say dot life's a drama</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">And some vos good and some vos bad</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In life's long panorama.</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">He says der vorld is hard and tinks</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">Dot fate is cruel, and he drinks.</l>
<l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">I says unto mineself, and vinks,</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“He has dot Katzenjammer!”</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">He has dot Katzenjammer, zo!</l>
<l n="36" part="N" TEIform="l">I tinks he vos a shammer, zo!</l>
<l n="37" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">I tinks a lot</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Of people's got</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">Der grossen Katzenjammer!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e11014"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Month Of May.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">I love the merry month of May</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When all the world seems fairer!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">I love the Council's watering dray</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">A-crawling on its drowsy way,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">I love its little tiny spray</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Like tear-drops on Sahara!</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">I love the merry month of May</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When all the world seems fairer!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">I love the merry month of May</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When lengthy droughts are scaring!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, life is pleasant, life is gay!</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">I love the merry month of May</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">When parsons want to make us pray</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And squatters fall to swearing!</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">I love the merry month of May</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When lengthy droughts are scaring!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e11071"><pb n="108" TEIform="pb" id="d64e11072"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Love And The Cycles.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Bert bestrode a Bradbury,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And Rosie rode a Rover,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Rosie she was fair to see</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And smiled as it behove her!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Away they went; it might have been</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In ancient days to Gretna Green.</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">“Oh, my machine's a fine machine!”</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Said Rosie on the Rover.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Rosie rode a Rover</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And Bert bestrode a Bradbury;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Rose demure was sweet and pure</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As cocoa made by Cadbury!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And not a cloud arose between</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To mar the brightness of the scene,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Till “My machine's the best machine!”</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Said Bertie on the Bradbury.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Bertie backed the Bradbury</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To romp around the Rover,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Rosie said he'd lost his head</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And everything was over!</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And so they parted, he and she,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And both as cross as cross could be,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">For Bert bestrode a Bradbury</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">While Rosie rode a Rover!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e11156"><pb n="109" TEIform="pb" id="d64e11157"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Rural Politics.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Septimus Smith was an orator bold</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And an orator bold was he,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And an eloquent man when he began</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As ever you'd wish to see;</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And the one desire that filled his breast</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was a statesman for to be</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And to repper-resent in Parley-ament</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A country constituencee!</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">A noble ambition</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">For men of position</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You'll readily all agree</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">For to repper-resent in Parley-ament</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A country constituencee!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">Octavius Brown was a regular chump,</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And his relatives all confess</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">That Octavius Brown as a circus clown</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Would have been a pronounced success.</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">Now Octavius Brown, he too desired</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Notorious for to be</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">And to repper-resent in Parley-ament</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That country constituencee!</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">No man is so foolish,</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Pig-headed or mulish</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But's morally certain he</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Can repper-resent in Parley-ament</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A country constituencee!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">Now Septimus Smith could speak real well,</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Octavius Brown could “shout,”</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">And the last must win, so he got put in</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And Septimus was “put out.”</l></lg>
<pb n="110" TEIform="pb" id="d64e11258"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">A talentea man is not required—</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You need n't know A from B</l>
<l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">For to repper-resent in Parley-ament</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A country constituencee!</l>
<l n="35" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Who flatters and chatters</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">On family matters</l>
<l n="37" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The likeliest person he</l>
<l n="38" part="N" TEIform="l">For to repper-resent in Parley-ament</l>
<l n="39" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A country constituencee!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="40" part="N" TEIform="l">In Parliament Brown said never a word,</l>
<l n="41" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He had n't the sense, you see;</l>
<l n="42" part="N" TEIform="l">But at bridges and roads, and similar loads,</l>
<l n="43" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">No member more apt than he.</l>
<l n="44" part="N" TEIform="l">He's popular now if he has no brains</l>
<l n="45" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And as long as he likes he'll be</l>
<l n="46" part="N" TEIform="l">For to repper-resent in Parley-ament</l>
<l n="47" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That country constituencee!</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">A man of position</l>
<l n="49" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And void of volition</l>
<l n="50" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You'll certainly all agree</l>
<l n="51" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Should repper-resent in Parley-ament</l>
<l n="52" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A country constituencee!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e11333"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Godly Johnsons.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">John Johnson was a godly man,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A godly man was he,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">He lived upon the simple plan</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of working charity.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">He had a “home for aged poor,”</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A “home for orphans,” too,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">No waif was turned from Johnson's door;</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Besides, it would n't do!</l></lg>
<pb n="111" TEIform="pb" id="d64e11363"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">The public came up to the scratch</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To find him with the means,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">In fact we never met his match</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">At raking in the beans.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And Johnson was so very nice,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">So pious and so good,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And so entirely free from vice—</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(So people understood!)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And Mrs. Johnson was a dame</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Well suited to her mate,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Who gained considerable fame</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In temperance debate.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And Mr. J. and Mrs. J.</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">No Christian toil would shirk;</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Reclaiming sinners, so they say,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is easier than work!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">And Johnson did, of course, belong</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To nearly every lodge</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">(You can't come out in this too strong</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In working any dodge).</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">So Mr. J. and Mrs. J.</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Waxed famous near and far,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">And everybody used to say,</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“How good those Johnsons are!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">Now, doctored cards are right enough</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And loaded dice may pay,</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">And two-up coins may bring in “stuff”</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If worked the proper way;</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">But, oh! the champion dodge of all,</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And one that brings in most</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">Is “answering to duty's call”</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And “rescuing the lost.”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e11471"><pb n="112" TEIform="pb" id="d64e11472"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Mosquito And The Politician.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There was a bad mosquito</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With a most tremendous sting,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And he was a very vicious</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And extremely wicked thing.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">He would puncture all the people</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That he ever came across,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">He had killed an alligator</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And had paralysed a hoss.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">He could sting a knight in armour,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He could drill a stucco wall,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">He could pierce a Cornish boiler—</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was the daddy of 'em all.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">From his lengthy list of glories</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He had never known a rest</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Till he met a politician</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he had to give him best.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">He attacked the sleeping statesman,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Started boring at his cheek,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">But he wore his sting to nothing</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">After working for a week.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Then he left and told his troubles</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To a relative who said</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">“Well, you must have been a donkey</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Not to sting him on the head!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e11555"><pb n="113" TEIform="pb" id="d64e11556"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Bundabah.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was Gentleman Jack from Jamberoo,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The ringer of Bundabah,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">He shore his hundred and forty-two</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And never sang out for “tar!”</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">He ribbed the wether and ribbed the ewe,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">The leathery necks he pinked 'em too,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Did Gentleman Jack of Jamberoo,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The ringer of Bundabah!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Now T. Bellwether, Esquire, J.P.,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was owner of Bundabah,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And brought some gentlemen up to see</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">His property, famed afar.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And two of the crowd, a beautiful two,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">De Brown and Jones of Woolloomooloo,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Were dressed to kill the pretty girls who</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Were staying at Bundabah!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And Kit Bellwether, the prettiest girl,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The beauty of Bundabah,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">A gem she was, and a perfect pearl,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A diamond and a star!</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Her smiling eye was a lovely blue,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">Her silvery laugh it thrilled you through,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">De Brown and Jones were mashed, so too</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was another at Bundabah!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">De Brown and Jones of Woolloomooloo</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Were “gone” upon Bundabah,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">They wanted the place and the beauty too—</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But which of 'em? There you are!</l>
<pb n="114" TEIform="pb" id="d64e11651"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">They argued, quarrelled, and even swore</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">In a style unfit for the clothes they wore,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">And determined to fight as the knights of yore,</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For possession of Bundabah!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">The “shed” knocked off and they formed a ring</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For the honour of Bundabah;</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">The cook, being up in that sort of thing,</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was umpire and held the tar.</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">The rivals had n't a deal of skill</l>
<l n="38" part="N" TEIform="l">But went to work with a right good will,</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">And never was seen such a glorious mill,</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Before upon Bundabah!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">“Now give it him, Jones!” the chaps called out:</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Now Browney, show who you are!”</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">Poor Jones went down with a terrible clout</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the rouseabouts called for “tar!”</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">And on they went till the boss broke through</l>
<l n="46" part="N" TEIform="l">And said, “My blanketty girl has flew</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">With that blanketty blank from Jamberoo!”</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The ringer of Bundabah!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="49" part="N" TEIform="l">And oh it was a terrible scene,</l>
<l n="50" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">An awfully nasty jar!</l>
<l n="51" part="N" TEIform="l">De Brown had “been through a threshing machine,”</l>
<l n="52" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And Jones had many a scar,</l>
<l n="53" part="N" TEIform="l">But over the plains and hills so blue</l>
<l n="54" part="N" TEIform="l">A pair of horses they simply flew,</l>
<l n="55" part="N" TEIform="l">With Gentleman Jack from Jamberoo</l>
<l n="56" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the beauty of Bundabah!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e11746"><pb n="115" TEIform="pb" id="d64e11747"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">“——!” <hi TEIform="hi">(The Great Australian Adjective!)</hi></head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">The sunburnt —— stockman stood</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">And, in a dismal —— mood,</l>
<l n="3" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Apostrophised his —— cuddy;</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">The —— nag's no —— good,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">He could n't earn his —— food——</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A regular —— brumby,</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">——!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">He jumped across the —— horse</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And cantered off, of —— course!</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The roads were bad and —— muddy;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Said he: “Well, spare me —— days</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">The —— Government's —— ways</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Are screamin' —— funny,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">——!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">He rode up hill, down —— dale,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">The wind it blew a —— gale,</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The creek was high and —— floody.</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">Said he: “The —— horse must swim,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">The same for —— me and him,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is something —— sickenin',</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">——!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">He plunged into the —— creek,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">The —— horse was —— weak,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The stockman's face a —— study!</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">And though the —— horse was drowned</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">The —— rider reached the ground</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Ejaculating: “——?”</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">“——!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e11846"><pb n="116" TEIform="pb" id="d64e11847"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">A Sad Case.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">The landowner sat in his soft armchair</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With a tear in his bright blue eye,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And he poked at the fire that was blazing there,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he heaved a pathetical sigh,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And he opened a bottle of Mumm's champagne</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Which the footman had placed at hand,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And he drank in his sorrow and grief and pain—</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They were going to tax his land.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">The landowner paced on his velvet pile,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And gazed at a marble bust,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Ah! why was the world so horrid and vile!</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">No statesman was safe to trust.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">He rang for a Henry Clay cigar</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Sat down at the Steinway grand,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And sadly he plunged through the opening bar—</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They were going to tax his land!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Then presently entered a liveried ass</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Announcing a visitor's name,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was Theophilus Crœsus Jones Mi<hi TEIform="hi">das</hi>—</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You've probably heard of the same?</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">He fell on the landowner's shoulder and wept</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With grief inexpressibly shocked,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">The Premier's promise was going to be kept,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And Crœsus's income was docked!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">These brothers in sorrow imbibed the champagne,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Havanna smoke upwardly curled,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">They sat and decided this terrible strain</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Demanded a trip round the world.</l>
<pb n="117" TEIform="pb" id="d64e11945"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">For grief or affliction unhinges the mind,</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Forgetfulness truly we need,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">When met with ungentleness, cruel and unkind,</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">At the hands of a demon like Reid!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">So Crœsus and Broadacres walked to and fro</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And looked through the window, from whence</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">They spotted two swagsmen encamped down below,</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Just outside of Broadacres' fence.</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">Then Crœsus and Broadacres' features relaxed,</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And angrily spoke they, and thus:—</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">“Ah, there are the wretches who ought to be taxed,</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And not such poor people as us!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e11989"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Politician.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">A man he is to all the country <hi TEIform="hi">dear</hi>,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">And purchased at three hundred pounds a year,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And studies all the arts of sly finesse,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Is gifted with spasmodic winsomeness;</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">To please, and not displease, demands his skill,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">To “hedge” until he sees the popular will.</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">An angler for the small vote, which he'll crave,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">But to the “great majority” a slave.</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Deploring much the weary waste of talk,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Which never yet he did a thing to baulk.</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">All things in turn, and watching well the wind</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">That veers the drifting of the public mind.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And, faithful to his trimming to the last,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">He proudly nails his weathercock to the mast.</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e12042"><pb n="118" TEIform="pb" id="d64e12043"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The New Anatomy.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Sing hey! Sing ho for the cycling face,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the cycling sickly smile!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And the weird and ghastly grey grimace</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">When you scorch along at a rattling pace</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In a <hi TEIform="hi">fin-de-siecle</hi> style!</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A mile</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In a <hi TEIform="hi">fin-de-siecle</hi> style!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Sing hey! Sing ho for the cycling head</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Which is twisted all awry,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And the cycling glance of anxious dread</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">At the traps and trams and cabs ahead,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the cycling staring eye,</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh my!</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the cycling staring eye!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Sing hey! Sing ho for the cycling crack</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With the beautiful bandy legs,</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Who pedals along on the racing track</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">With his empty chest and his humpty back,</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And his calves like ostrich eggs,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Such legs!</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And his calves like ostrich eggs!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">Sing hey! Sing ho for the cycling gang</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the beautiful style they've got,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">With the smile of a brown orang-outang</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">And a spine the shape of a boomerang</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a regular treadmill trot,</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Great Scott!</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a regular treadmill trot!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e12146"><pb n="119" TEIform="pb" id="d64e12147"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Whew!</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">When Timothy Toddles, of Woolloomooloo,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">On Saturday drew his magnificent “screw”</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">He made it a practice, as gentlemen do,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">To drop into “Tatt's” for an hour or two,</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And handle the cue,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And sample a brew,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">With divers acquaintances Timothy knew!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">The men of his set were a jovial crew</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And stuck to each other like carpenter's glue,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And many a pound in an “Adams” they threw,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Though never a ghost of a starter they drew,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">But, close to a few,</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">They never looked blue,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And hoped in the future good luck would accrue.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">He went to the races on Saturday too</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">The rest of his earnings the better to “blew,”</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And certain acquaintances gave him a clue</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">[Which helped him to lose it the faster, say you!]</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And that's very true,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">For many a Jew</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Was richer by Toddles of Woolloomooloo.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">But Timothy Toddles of Woolloomooloo,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">He married a woman decidedly “new;”</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">She straddled a bike and he could n't say “boo,”</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">When over the thoroughfare daily she flew,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And Timothy grew</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Afraid of the shrew</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">But dared not to kick up a hullabaloo!</l></lg>
<pb n="120" TEIform="pb" id="d64e12244"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">He'd cook up her breakfast and polish her shoe,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">He'd bake and he'd boil and he'd fry and he'd stew,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">She would n't allow him to smoke or to chew,</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">And life had a different kind of a hue.</l>
<l n="33" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, she was a true</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Unspeakable blue,</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">The lady of Toddles of Woolloomooloo!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="36" part="N" TEIform="l">His wages she collared, immediately due,</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">And no use for Timmy to beg or to sue.</l>
<l n="38" part="N" TEIform="l">No more to the races went Timothy, who</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">Could not get a shilling to handle a cue.</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">You bachelors view</l>
<l n="41" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">With glances askew,</l>
<l n="42" part="N" TEIform="l">The fate of poor Toddles of Woolloomooloo!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e12293"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Why Indeed?</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">It was a sage of ancient Greece in philosophic mood,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">He wandered from the city to a thickly-timbered wood;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And there he saw a sinful man a-fastening a rope</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Unto a bough. The stranger's brow was sad and lacking hope.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">“Why, how now, friend,” observed the sage, “wouldst thou then end thy life?</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">I pray thee, stranger, think again, thou hast no doubt a wife?”</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">“I am not married,” said the man, a gloomy doleful elf.</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">“Not married!” echoed loud the sage, “then why do you hang yourself?”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e12324"><pb n="121" TEIform="pb" id="d64e12325"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">A Dismal Tale.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">The moon shone on the back-yard fence,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">The scene was calm and still</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Grim silence reigned—the shades were dense</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">The air was cold and chill!</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">(Ah! Ah!)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">It was the “witching hour” of night—</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">The hour when “churchyards yawn”</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Two stealthy figures crept in sight</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">A third between them borne!</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">(Ho! Ho!)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">They hurried on with guilty speed,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Those cruel murderers two,</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">For oh! it was a darksome deed</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">They were about to do!</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">(Ber-lud!)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Between the cruel and guilty pair</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">The struggling victim lay;</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">His cries rang out upon the air</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">But help was far away!</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">(What ho there!)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Upon the bough of yonder tree</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">A rope is hanging loose,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And round the victim's neck, ah me!</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">Is placed the running noose!</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">(Bejabers!)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">The victim weeps with piteous tears,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">The victim cries amain,</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">The cries do fall on heartless ears,</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">The tears are all in vain!</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">(Great Caesar!)</l></lg>
<pb n="122" TEIform="pb" id="d64e12426"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">One sudden jerk upon the rope,</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">One pull upon the thread,</l>
<l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">And now has gone all chance of hope,</l>
<l n="34" part="N" TEIform="l">The victim's hanging dead!</l>
<l n="35" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">(Ochone!)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="36" part="N" TEIform="l">When morning broke, oh, what a sight!</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">Was there for men to see!</l>
<l n="38" part="N" TEIform="l">A murdered form in fearful plight</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">A-hanging from a tree!</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">(Whirrasthru!)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">We cut him down with tender care,</l>
<l n="42" part="N" TEIform="l">We dug his lonely grave,</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">We laid him in with such a prayer</l>
<l n="44" part="N" TEIform="l">As might befit the brave.</l>
<l n="45" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">(Slow music.)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="46" part="N" TEIform="l">And o'er his grave the violets grow,</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">The winter wild wind howls.</l>
<l n="48" part="N" TEIform="l">'Tis our dog Toby's grave, you know—</l>
<l n="49" part="N" TEIform="l">Got hanged for killing fowls!</l>
<l n="50" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">(Bad cess to him!)</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e12494"><pb n="123" TEIform="pb" id="d64e12495"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">On Paper!</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">We've worked our mines</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper)</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Bought railway lines</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper)</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">In fact we've bought</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">All we import</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Of every sort</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper).</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Importers sell</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper),</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And all do well</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper).</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Shopkeepers buy,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And always try</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">To make things high</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">We buy our traps</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper),</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Bank notes, perhaps</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(But paper).</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">We count our chink,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">We write and think,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">We eat and drink</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper).</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Our wives buy gowns</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper),</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">We build our towns</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper).</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">All wealth is made,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">All assets laid,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">All wages paid</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(In paper).</l></lg>
<pb n="124" TEIform="pb" id="d64e12604"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">We're concert pitch</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper).</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">We're beastly rich</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper).</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">We're up to snuff,</l>
<l n="38" part="N" TEIform="l">We've whips of stuff,</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">And lots of bluff</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper).</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">Our banks, great Scott!</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper),</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">What piles they've got</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper).</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">And e'en these few</l>
<l n="46" part="N" TEIform="l">Poor lines, though true,</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">Are sent to you</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(On paper)!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e12660"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Average M.P.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">My humour takes the fashion of pre-adamite jocosity,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">I revel in a labyrinth of glorious verbosity;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">I reiterate in speaking with unceasing continuity,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">And then I recapitulate with charming assiduity;</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">I talk on points of order that the other members tabulate,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And it's wonderful how frequently the “tinklers” tintinnabulate;</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">My lack of solid argument but makes me argumentative;</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">I am a splendid sample of a worthy representative!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e12691"><pb n="125" TEIform="pb" id="d64e12692"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Breath Of Smelson.</head>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">Recitative</hi>—</p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">O'er Smelson's fate, with silent grief opprest,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">His comrades mourn their hero's sad arrest!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">But those bright laurels will not fade with years</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Whose leaves are watered by colonial beers!</l></lg>
<p TEIform="p"><hi TEIform="hi">The Song</hi>—</p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was down at Watson's Bay</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">We drank long beers all day,</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">We could not stand egg-flip!</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">We scorned the foreign yolk,</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And much preferred she-oak,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And stuck to beer that trip.</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Our Smelson marked them on the slate,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Three beers we had, or seven or eight,</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">No man was ev-er-er cuter,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">No man was ev-er-er cuter.</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Along the bar the signal ran,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">“Smel-son-expects—that ev—er-ree man</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">This day will drain his pewter!</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">This day we—ill drain—his pewter!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And now the barmen roar,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">To see the frightful score,</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And Smelson leads the way!</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">He was “The Nugget” named,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">For fistic victory famed,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With victory crowned that day!</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">But dearly was that conquest bought,</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">Two policemen soon the barmen brought;</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">And Smelson was er-er scooter,</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">Poor Smelson was er-er scooter!</l>
<pb n="126" TEIform="pb" id="d64e12797"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">Yet cried when placed inside the van</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">“Smel-son-expects that ev-er-ree man,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">This day will drain his pewter,</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">This day we—ill drain—his pewter!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">Next day the fateful sound:</l>
<l n="34" part="N" TEIform="l">“The prisoner's fined two pound,</l>
<l n="35" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Or else a month in gaol,”</l>
<l n="36" part="N" TEIform="l">And then poor Smelson sighed,</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">He paid the fine and cried</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“I've done with Toohey's ale.</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">In drinking beer my life was passed,</l>
<l n="40" part="N" TEIform="l">With drinking beer I've done at last!”</l>
<l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">And Smelson's gro-own much cuter,</l>
<l n="42" part="N" TEIform="l">And Smelson's gro-own much cuter.</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">But winding up as he began</l>
<l n="44" part="N" TEIform="l">Smel-son-confessed that ev—er—ree man</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">That day had drained his pewter</l>
<l n="46" part="N" TEIform="l">That day had drained—his pewter!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e12858"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Same Old Style.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">In days of old</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">The warrior bold</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">His sweetheart when he found her,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Declared the girl</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">A priceless pearl,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And put his armour round her!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And still to-day</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">The gallant gay</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">In ancient ways will flounder.</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">He</hi> thinks his girl</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">A priceless pearl,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And puts his arm around her!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e12903"><pb n="127" TEIform="pb" id="d64e12904"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Indian Hawker.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Dan McCann of Baldybran,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">An ordinary hawker,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">He found things rough when he began,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For though he was a talker,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">He made the nicest kind of bow,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">He got no trade, and this was how:</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Australian wives prefer the Chow</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Or else the Indian hawker!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Now, Dan McCann was just the man</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Whose name was never “Walker,”</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And thought, when he devised a plan,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">No obstacle a baulker.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And so a scheme he deeply laid</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">To best his rivals at the trade;</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, he was grit, as e'er was made,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was Dan McCann the hawker!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">The plan of Dan, of Baldybran,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">It was a perfect corker,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">He'd been one time for just a span</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A pantomimic “chalker.”</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">He stained his face from neck to head,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">He made a turban fiery red,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Burnt-corked his eyebrows, and he said:</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Now <hi TEIform="hi">I'm</hi> an Indian hawker!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Dan McCann, of Baldybran,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The famous Indian hawker,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">Whose business name is Mataban</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Mahommed Ben Mazourka:</l>
<pb n="128" TEIform="pb" id="d64e13002"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">His trade is great and come to stay,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">His low salaam is something gay,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">And many a time he's blessed the day</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He turned an Indian hawker!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e13018"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Girl For Us.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">You talk about your gifted girl</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With high and haughty plans,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Whose brilliant brain is half again</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As large as any man's.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">But oh, the girl who takes a kiss</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And never makes a fuss,</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">The cuddlesome girl,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">The squeezable girl,</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Now <hi TEIform="hi">that's</hi> the girl for us!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">You talk about your doctor girl,</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Your feminine M.D.,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Whose wondrous mind is of a kind</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That's marvellous to see;</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">But oh, the ordinary girl</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who likes a hearty buss,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">The mashable girl,</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">The kissable girl,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Now <hi TEIform="hi">that's</hi> the girl for us!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e13087"><pb n="129" TEIform="pb" id="d64e13088"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Long-Bow.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the vanquished flaxen Saxon</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was a yawning, fawning churl,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And the badly strangled Angle</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Called the Norman war-man Earl;</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">When the Baron, boldly, coldly,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Had the Briton written low,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, the doughty marcher archer</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Pulled a yeoman bowman's bow!</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Pulled a bow,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Ashen bow,</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Thus returning blow for blow,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Then the vanquished flaxen Saxon</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Pulled a yeoman bowman's bow!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And we still have yeomen bowmen</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In this striving thriving time,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">If we have no gory glory</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Nor romantic antique rhyme;</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">You don't find the Murkan shirkin'</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When he's trying lying low,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">For the modern cranky Yankee</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Pulls a yeoman bowman's bow!</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Pulls a bow,</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Lengthy bow,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">'T is the Yankee style of blow.</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, the modern cranky Yankee</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Pulls a yeoman bowman's bow!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e13178"><pb n="130" TEIform="pb" id="d64e13179"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Post Office Pen.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">'T is the tale of a pen,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">A penurious pen,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Of a penalty pen with a splutter,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">That you would n't pick up in the gutter!</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">But that Mister J. Cook</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">In his napper has took</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">As the thing that the public requires</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">For the speedy inditing of wires.</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">It splutters and splashes</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And blots all the dashes</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">In horrible fashion</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Provoking a passion;</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Splutter,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Splitter,</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Splosh!</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Never get finished, by gosh!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">'T is the tale of a pen,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Of a post-office pen,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Of a pen with a penchant for sneezing,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">And coughing and spitting and wheezing;</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">A consumptive old pen</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Which you'd think now and then</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Ought to clearly retire on a pension,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">A suggestion you never should mention!</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">It coughs and it splutters,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">It whispers and mutters</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Inducing in verses,</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And out of 'em, curses!</l>
<l n="29" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Splutter,</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Splitter,</l>
<l n="31" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Splash!</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">Hang it and blank it and dash!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e13286"><pb n="131" TEIform="pb" id="d64e13287"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Slippery Bill.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was Slippery Bill from Jacksonville,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The rep. at Rumberoo;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">The shearers bowed to his sovereign will</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As shearers always do;</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">At Yankee grab he'd an artful knack,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And a splendid hand with a euchre pack</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Was Slippery Bill from Jacksonville,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The rep. at Rumberoo!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">When Rumber shore with the “ninety-four”</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">It roused his wrath a few;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">He called a meeting and loudly swore</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He'd fight till all was blue.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And the rouseabouts and the shearers all</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">They answered up to the bugle call</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Of Slippery Bill from Jacksonville,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The rep. at Rumberoo!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">They swore right then the devil a pen</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They'd shear on Rumberoo;</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And they were the happiest kind of men</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And joyful parties too!</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">They formed a camp at the creek below,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">And the man they chose to boss the show</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Was Slippery Bill from Jacksonville,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The rep. at Rumberoo!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">They were a loud and jovial crowd</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With joy the moments flew,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">They'd cuchre, poker, banker, crib,</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And yankee grab and loo.</l>
<pb n="132" TEIform="pb" id="d64e13382"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">They played till every sprat was spent,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">And never a one possessed a cent</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">But Slippery Bill from Jacksonville,</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The rep. at Rumberoo!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">And then they said they'd fire the shed</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And raise a hullabaloo;</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">And Bill heard every word they said</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And marked the speakers too.</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">They fired the shed and off they went,</l>
<l n="38" part="N" TEIform="l">That's all but one who hid in a tent;</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was Slippery Bill from Jacksonville,</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The rep. at Rumberoo!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">They were n't too gay as they went away,</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was an ugly thing to do,</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">And they all were filled at the news next day</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With apprehension too.</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">For the flames were out in the shed they fired</l>
<l n="46" part="N" TEIform="l">And the run got all the hands required;</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">And Slippery Bill from Jacksonville,</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He shore at Rumberoo!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="49" part="N" TEIform="l">The police got hold of those shearers bold,</l>
<l n="50" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who felt extremely blue,</l>
<l n="51" part="N" TEIform="l">And were all in gaol ere a man was told</l>
<l n="52" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who'd put them in the stew.</l>
<l n="53" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was that son of a gun with the artful knack,</l>
<l n="54" part="N" TEIform="l">That splendid hand with the euchre pack,</l>
<l n="55" part="N" TEIform="l">That Slippery Bill from Jacksonville,</l>
<l n="56" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The rep. of Rumberoo!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e13477"><pb n="133" TEIform="pb" id="d64e13478"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">On The Old Barcoo.</head>
<p TEIform="p">A scientifically accurate jingle dedicated to Naturalist McCooey.</p>
<p TEIform="p">[“The Breaker” having written a clever bit of verse for <hi TEIform="hi">The Bulletin</hi>, Mr. McCooey wrote stating that “The Breaker” had erred in writing that certain trees grew in close proximity. If persons of the matter-of-fact style of Mr. McCooey were allowed their way there would be an end to poetry altogether!]</p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Away out back on the old Barcoo</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the blithe and the gay gohanna</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Sings serenades in the leafy shades</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In a truly soulful manner!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the lobster swims in the waterholes</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As red as a ripe toe-martyr,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And the 'possum trills in a voice that thrills</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Some fugue of a Bach sonata.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the elm and beech and the cocoanut palm</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Russian fir trees cluster,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the sheep and goats and the elks and stoats</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the apes and the reindeer muster!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the stockman thrums on his light guitar</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As he rides on his mustang charger,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">To his marble halls with the jasper walls—</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">An imperial palace, but larger!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, life is grand on the old Barcoo</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With an eighteen-gallon of Toohey!</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And a perfect gorge of Henry George,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of John S. Mill and McCooey.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And the <hi TEIform="hi">Millthorpe News</hi> and the <hi TEIform="hi">Peak Hill Times</hi></l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the <hi TEIform="hi">Gov'ment Gazette</hi> for humour,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And a spread for a chief, say a junk of beef</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">From a beast condemned for tumour!</l></lg>
<pb n="134" TEIform="pb" id="d64e13578"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, the clear blue sky on a cloudy day!</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When it's cold in the tropic of Cancer,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">When you shout in vain on the treeless plain</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the hills in echoes answer!</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">When the mountains nod their drowsy heads</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the parched sands weep so dryly,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">And the fountains play the “Boom-de-ay,”</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Wot Cher” and “Mollie Riley!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">When the crocuses croak like the old bull-frog</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the sunflowers try to warm yer,</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">And the flannel-flowers grow red shirts, you know—</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If you don't McCooey'll inform you!</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, life is gay on the old Barcoo</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To a man like me or McCooey,</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">That's a scientist, mind, of the accurate kind,</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But for others—they'd better hump bluey!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">“<hi TEIform="hi">Where?” Why</hi>—</l>
<l n="42" part="N" TEIform="l">Away out back on the old Barcoo</l>
<l n="43" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the blithe and the gay gohanna</l>
<l n="44" part="N" TEIform="l">Sings serenades in the leafy shades</l>
<l n="45" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In a truly soulful manner!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e13652"><pb n="135" TEIform="pb" id="d64e13653"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Loafer's Lay.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, some may sing of the verdant spring,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When the violets sweet are blooming O!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And some may trill of the times so ill</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the glorious day that's looming O!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">But I will sing of a different thing</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a different key will do me O!</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">I'm a jovial bard when the times are hard</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the general outlook's gloomy O!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">For the times are dull and the artless gull</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is a friend indeed to the tramper O!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And he comes up grand with his open hand</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And his tea and his beef and his damper O!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, it grieves his heart when I must impart</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">All the woes that e'er assail me O!</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">I'm a jovial card when the times are hard</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the pitiful tale can't fail me O!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">I expect I'll curse if they don't get worse,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For the worse the better I like it O!</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">As it makes it sure when I come to a door</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And ask for a feed that I strike it O!</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">For they can't refuse in the face of the news</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That thousands of men are idle O!</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And they feel so sad that they're always “had”</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When my sorrowful griefs I bridle O!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">So I trill my lay and shout hooray</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That the Parliament's beastly lazy O!</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">And I laugh and sing like a Gipsy King</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">While it drives the country crazy O!</l>
<pb n="136" TEIform="pb" id="d64e13748"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">If industrious men had a chance, why then</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">My pitiful yarns would fail me O!</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">And if none need shirk who'd a wish to work</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Then somebody'd sure to gaol me O!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">And I do not sing of the verdant spring</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the violets sweet a-blooming O!</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">And I do not cheer for the good times near</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Nor the prosperous day that's looming O!</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, I'm full of joy that there's none to employ</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And that work grows scarcer daily O!</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">And I laugh and dance at the splendid chance</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They are offering me so gaily O!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e13791"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Room At The Top.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">When I was a lad, which is ages ago,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">This wisdom I heard from my “pop,”</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">The ladder is full at the bottom, you know,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“But there's plenty of room at the top!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">It was perfectly true, but I never had luck,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And I probably was n't much chop;</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">I could see, though I could n't get out of the ruck,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There was “plenty of room at the top.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And now I'm as bald as a bladder of lard</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Where I once had a plentiful crop,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">It is true, though it seems most infernally hard,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There is “plenty of room at the top.”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e13835"><pb n="137" TEIform="pb" id="d64e13836"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Old Man Canobolas.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">What time the Mammoth roamed the wild,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">What time the boiling brook was aisled</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">By giant flora rich and rank</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Arising from each scorching bank,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">The only sounds the forest stirred</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">The roar of beast, the cry of bird,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Long ere the human voice was heard</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Stood Old Man Canobolas!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">When basalt in a molten tide</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Ran rivers down the mountain side,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And seared and scarred the fertile plain,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Volcanic ashes fell like rain,</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Primeval man, in awful dread,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">Before the flaming torrent fled;</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Above the scene still reared his head</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Our Old Man Canobolas!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">When Moses led the Israelites,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">When Cyrus ruled the Persian rites,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">When Phidias carved in old Athene,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">When Rome of all the world was queen,</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">When Cæsar crossed the western foam</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">And captive Britons led to Rome;</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">In his undreamed-of island home</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Stood Old Man Canobolas!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Long ages rolled, he stood the same,</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">Till o'er the eastern mountains came</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">A sound unknown to pristine ears—</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">The sturdy tramp of pioneers!</l>
<pb n="138" TEIform="pb" id="d64e13931"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">The sons of an unconquered race,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">The strangers worked with heart of grace</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">A human ant-hill at the base</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Of Old Man Canobolas!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">He stands a monument to man</l>
<l n="34" part="N" TEIform="l">That human life is but a span.</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">He smiles upon our infant schemes,</l>
<l n="36" part="N" TEIform="l">Our aims, our hopes, our childish dreams;</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">He sighs upon our cares and strife,</l>
<l n="38" part="N" TEIform="l">The plans with which our air is rife;</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">“These insects think and talk of <hi TEIform="hi">life!</hi>”</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Laughs Old Man Canobolas!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e13978"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Human Nature.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">When you fill a lowly station,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And you do not own a crown,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">In the public estimation</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You are simply thomas brown.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">But successful speculation</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">May achieve your heart's desire;</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And you'll find, with exultation,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You are THOMAS BROWN, ESQUIRE.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">For the world has penetration</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And it loves a man of means,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And has boundless admiration</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For the blessedness of “beans.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">All those copy-book suggestions</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Are the veriest of trash.</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">People ask no awkward questions</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If you've got the ready cash!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e14035"><pb n="139" TEIform="pb" id="d64e14036"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Out-Of-Works.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">The land lies under a gloomy pall</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">That covers the country, town and all,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">The days of boom are gone and past,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">We're face to face with the truth at last,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And greater danger still there lurks</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">In the ominous tramp of the out-of-works.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Grim rumours fly of pending ill,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">That ‘times' may yet be harder still,</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And ‘coin is scarce' and ‘things are dull,'</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And ever above the dismal lull</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">There comes the sorrowful sound that irks,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">'T is the ominous tramp of the out-of-works.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">The sun is bright, and the sky is blue,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And Nature wears her happiest hue;</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">The crops grow high with the golden grain.</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">The clouds besprinkle the needful rain,</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">The hand of Nature no duty shirks—</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">But hark to the tramp of the out-of-works!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And men must wander in anxious dread,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">And women and children want for bread,</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And ‘things' grow worse from day to day</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">For lack of a man to lead the way,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">A man to clamor for land and tools</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">Of the hundred and odd who're mostly fools.</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e14117"><pb n="140" TEIform="pb" id="d64e14118"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Home Rule.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Sure, she came from Tipperary</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the town of Ballynagoe,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And her step was like a fairy,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And her eye was like a sloe,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And her laugh was light an' airy,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She'd a smile for friend or foe,</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">For Biddy McGee</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Was always free</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">  And hearty!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And her boy, he was a daisy,</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Finer lad there ne'er was seen,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And himself was nearly crazy</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For the laughing-eyed colleen;</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And the weddin' it would amaze ye,</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There was wigs upon the green,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">When Biddy McGee</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Was Mistress P.</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l"> McCarty!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">They were married a year, and doting</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Had about commenced to cool,</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">When election time came floating,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With the candidates a school.</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Said the agent: ‘Pat, ye're voting,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Ain't ye darlin', for Home Rule?</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">The divil a bit</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Ye'd like to split</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l"> The Party?'</l></lg>
<pb n="141" TEIform="pb" id="d64e14209"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">‘Will I promise I won't forsake yez.</l>
<l n="29" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Why confound yer polly-ticks!</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">If the likes o' me could make yez,</l>
<l n="31" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Ye'd be rid of all yer tricks!</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">Want Home Rule? The devil can take yez,</l>
<l n="33" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Sure, I've had enough for six</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Since Biddy McGee</l>
<l n="35" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Was Mistress P.</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l"> McCarty!'</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e14242"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Woman Who Did N't.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">She was a curiosity of eighteen-ninety-six,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">She did n't care a rap about such things as politics,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">She did n't want to go and vote although she might have gone,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">She'd rather stay at home and sew her husband's buttons on.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">She did n't want to ride a bike in bloomers very tight,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">She'd very pretty ankles, but she kept 'em out of sight,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">She always had a supper for her hubby of a night,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And she always cooked his breakfast in the morning.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">She loved her little baby and she could n't understand</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">The gilded immorality of Madame Sarah Grand,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Though her views of physiology were really very crude</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">She did n't think it clever to be impudent or rude.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">She was not a clever woman with a cultivated mind,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">For she did n't care for filthiness of any sort or kind,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">But she <hi TEIform="hi">was</hi> the sort of woman that a man would like to find,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And she made her home as happy as the morning.</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e14302"><pb n="142" TEIform="pb" id="d64e14303"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Difference.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Now Dr. McCann</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">When his practice began</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Was “a properly qualified medical man,”</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Which popular phrase</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">In degenerate days</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Is regarded as being the highest of praise!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And Timothy Tack</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Was a medical quack</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Who had not a diploma to stick on his back;</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Yet Timothy stuck</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">To his practice and struck</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">What his enemies said was most marvellous luck.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">When anyone ailed</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And the doctor had failed,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Then Timothy came and his treatment prevailed.</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Most wonderful too</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">With a gentleman who</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">Would admit that a college he'd never been through.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Thus old Mr. D—</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">When he paid him his fee</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Said he wondered he had n't a single degree;</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">“I wonder how can</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">You get into the van</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">When you're not a qualified medical man!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">“I am,” answered Tim</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">With a smile that was grim,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">“I'm a <hi TEIform="hi">qualified</hi> man”—and he glowered on him;</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">“But Dr. McCann</l>
<l n="29" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Who's opposed to my plan</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">Is a properly <hi TEIform="hi">registered</hi> medical man.”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e14410"><pb n="143" TEIform="pb" id="d64e14411"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Australian Literature.</head>
<p TEIform="p">“Are we” asks the <hi TEIform="hi">S.M. Herald</hi> in its time-honored non-committal manner, “evolving a distinctive Australian literature?” We are. Perpend and give ear:—</p>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There's the everlasting swaggie with his bluey on his back</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Who is striking out for sunset on the Never-never track;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">O'er the flat and barren country we can hear him tramping still</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">And he's Billy from the Darling or he's Murrumbidgee Bill;</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And his togs are pretty rusty and his blucher boots are brown,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And his shirt ain't just the color of the drapers' clerks in town,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And he's looking for the station tank his water-bag to fill</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">And wherever you may find him</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l"> He's the same</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">  Old</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">   Bill!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">There is Jim the dandy axeman who can chop six cords a day,</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">There is Micky from the Mulga who was ringer out at Hay,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">There's McPherson, overseer at the Moonaburna shed,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And the bloke that belted Clancy, with a slip-rail, on the head.</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">There's the chap that struck the nugget when his credit at the store</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Was so bad they stopped his tucker 'cos he could n't pay his score,</l>
<pb n="144" TEIform="pb" id="d64e14476"/>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">And the jackeroo from England with his quarterly “remit,”</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">And whene'er you read the story</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l"> It's the same</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Old</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l"> Skit!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">There's the son of Squatter Jumbuck, an unmitigated scamp,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">There's the barmaid up from Melbourne at the Mundic mining camp,</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">There is Thompson's wife, who bolted with the chap from Bendigo,</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">And the bloke who broke the record when he drove for Cobb and Co.</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">There is “blanky” this and “blanky” that and more expressive terms</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">Indicating of the vigor of our literary germs;</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">And the <hi TEIform="hi">Sydney Morning Herald</hi> must n't take us all for flats,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">We're a literary nation</l>
<l n="31" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">And we ain't</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">  Got</l>
<l n="33" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">   Rats?</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e14533"><pb n="145" TEIform="pb" id="d64e14534"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">What It's Coming To.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">(By the Football Umpire of the Future).</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Now fetch to me my armour bright,</l>
<l n="3" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">My helm of hardened steel,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">And strong cuirass, for I must pass</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">This day the great ordeal;</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And bring to me my trusty sword,</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">All sharpened for the fray,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">I'll need all that to umpire at</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The football match to-day.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And bring the cannon into line,</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And drill the Light Brigade</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">To keep at bay the “push” to-day</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If they should make a raid!</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And bring each team its heap of rocks,</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Its clubs and hobnail boots,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Which things, you know, are all the go</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For settling up disputes!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">And don't forget the ambulance</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And surgeons three or four,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">And wools and lints and lots of splints</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And bandages galore;</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">And let the players make their wills</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And fix up their affairs,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">Lest in the fray that comes to-day</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They're taken unawares.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">And, O, my courage, fail me not,</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And, O, my heart, be strong!</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">For I must face a warlike race</l>
<l n="29" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And they may swear I'm wrong.</l>
<pb n="146" TEIform="pb" id="d64e14632"/>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">So bring to me my trusty sword,</l>
<l n="31" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">All sharpened for the fray,</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">My armour bright and helmet tight—</l>
<l n="33" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There's football on to-day!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e14648"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Mining Mart.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Now this is the art of the mining mart</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In good old London town,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the broker dreams a thousand schemes</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For taking the public down!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">To make a fine prospectus shine</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Good writers you engage,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And then record the name of a lord</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On the top of the title-page!</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">If a first-class lord you can't afford,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Then a tinpot lord will do!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">But you must have a lord, some sort of a lord,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Or the scheme will not go through!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">For the Clapham man, and the Kilburn man,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the man on Highgate Hill,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Will snap at a bait at a splendid rate</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If you offer a gilded pill!</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And peers, you know, are made for show.</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And lords are all the rage,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">What you need, my dear, is a tinpot peer</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On the top of the title-page!</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">If a first-class lord you can't afford,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Then a tinpot lord will do!</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">But you must have a lord, some sort of a lord,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Or the mugs won't come to <hi TEIform="hi">you!</hi></l></lg>
<pb n="147" TEIform="pb" id="d64e14730"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, the Briton's free, or <hi TEIform="hi">thinks</hi> he's free,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When he's only a first-class ass;</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">And they take him down like a country clown,</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For his ignorance is crass;</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">And he'll spend his cash on the rottenest trash,</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And his vim you can't assuage:</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">Why, he'd rise and shine on a <hi TEIform="hi">sawdust</hi> mine</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With a lord on the title-page!</l>
<l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">If a first-class lord you can't afford</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Then a tinpot lord will do;</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">But you must have a lord, some sort of a lord,</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">And the Cockneys know it, too!</hi></l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e14778"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Rural Politicians.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">On the Billabong Creek</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">As you go to the Peak</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Is the humpy of Paddy Malony;</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And adjacent to it</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">If you walk on a bit</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Lives his countryman, Micky Maroney!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">They're an elegant pair</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">From the County of Clare,</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And they each have a decent selection;</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And together get tight,</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And if ever they fight</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Sure, it's only a proof of affection!</l></lg>
<pb n="148" TEIform="pb" id="d64e14820"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Och, then Paddy and Mick</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">They are wonderful thick</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And they love one another like brothers,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And are ready to swop</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">With a cow or a crop,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">For whatever one has is the other's!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">But as true love, they say</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Is n't smooth all the way,</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">It's the same with fraternal affection;</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">So with Micky's and Pat's,</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">They were Kilkenny cats</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">When it came to freetrade and protection!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was a beautiful sight</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">For to see how they'd fight</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">When O'Donnell put up for election;</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">For Maroney'd attest</l>
<l n="29" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">That freetrade was the best,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">While Malony went in for protection!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">And the divil a squall</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">They'd be having at all,</l>
<l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">Forbye their political squabbles,</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And it's proud, too, am I</l>
<l n="35" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">To explain to yez why</l>
<l n="36" part="N" TEIform="l">They got over the worst of their troubles.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was when Premier Reid</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">So politely agreed</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">All his earnest convictions to swallow,</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">That Maloney and Mick</l>
<l n="41" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Got entirely sick</l>
<l n="42" part="N" TEIform="l">Of debating a question so hollow!</l></lg>
<pb n="149" TEIform="pb" id="d64e14918"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">So the arguments cease;</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">There's perennial peace</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">With the cockies of Billabong section,</l>
<l n="46" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">For they say it's a sham</l>
<l n="47" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And don't matter a d—</l>
<l n="48" part="N" TEIform="l">If you call it freetrade or protection!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e14940"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Truthful Man.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Why do I drink? said Jones; ah well,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">You don't know all my trouble;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was bad enough, Lord knows, last year,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">But this year it's been double.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Why do I drink? said Brown; well, there,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">This life is full of crosses,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Enough to drive a man to drink</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">To think of all my losses!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Why do I drink? said Smith; I know</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">'T is worst of all abuses;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">I drink because I like to drink</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And make no dashed excuses.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And then we woke, and Brown and Jones</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">Were there in conversation,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">But Smith had been a creature of</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Our own imagination!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e14997"><pb n="150" TEIform="pb" id="d64e14998"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Great Australian Slanguage.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">'T is the everyday Australian</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Has a language of his own,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Has a language, or a slanguage,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Which can simply stand alone.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And “a dickon pitch to kid us,”</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is a synonym for “lie,”</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And to “nark it” means to stop it</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And to “nit it” means to fly!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And a bosom friend's a “cobber”</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a horse a “prad” or “moke,”</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">While a casual acquaintance</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is a “joker” or a “bloke,”</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And his lady-love's his “donah”</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Or his “clinah” or his “tart”</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Or his “little bit o' muslin,”</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As it used to be his “bart.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And his naming of the coinage</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is a mystery to some,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">With his “quid” and “half-a-caser”</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And his “deener” and his “scrum!”</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And a “tin-back” is a party</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who's remarkable for luck</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And his food is called his “tucker”</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Or his “panem” or his “chuck.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">A policeman is a “johnny”</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Or a “copman” or a “trap,”</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">And a thing obtained on credit</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is invariably “strap.”</l>
<pb n="151" TEIform="pb" id="d64e15093"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">A conviction's known as “trouble”</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a gaol is called a “jug,”</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">And a sharper is a “spieler”</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a simpleton's a “tug.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">If he hits a man in fighting,</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That is what he calls a “plug,”</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">If he borrows money from you,</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He will say he “bit your lug.”</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">And to “shake it” is to steal it,</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And to “strike it” is to beg.</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">And a jest is “poking borac,”</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the jester “pulls your leg.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">Things are “cronk” when they go wrongly</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the language of the “push,”</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">But when things go as he wants 'em</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He declares it is “all cush.”</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">When he's bright he's got a “napper,”</l>
<l n="46" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But he's “ratty” when he's daft,</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">And when looking for employment</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He is “out o' blooming graft.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="49" part="N" TEIform="l">And his clothes he calls his “clobber”</l>
<l n="50" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Or his “togs,” but what of that</l>
<l n="51" part="N" TEIform="l">When a “castor” or a “kady”</l>
<l n="52" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is the name he gives his hat!</l>
<l n="53" part="N" TEIform="l">And our undiluted English</l>
<l n="54" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is a fad to which we cling,</l>
<l n="55" part="N" TEIform="l">But the great Australian slanguage</l>
<l n="56" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is a truly awful thing!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e15188"><pb n="152" TEIform="pb" id="d64e15189"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Maud.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There's a cow around our section</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And we always call her Maud</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">'Cause she “comes into the garden”</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of her very own accord.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And she chews the blooming balsams</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">('T is not slang as you believe)</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And her impudence is something</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Truly awful to perceive.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">She demolishes the Banksia,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She consumes the Marshall Niel;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">On the lilies and the sunflowers</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Doth she make a midnight meal.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And her smile is that sarcastic,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That we would n't even hint</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">At the language we have uttered,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For it's quite unfit to print!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">There is not a lock invented,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Not a bolt and not a screw,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">This felonious marauder</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Could n't manage to undo.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And the only consolation</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That we now have left to hug,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Is, she don't come in the drawing-room</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And camp upon the rug.</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e15273"><pb n="153" TEIform="pb" id="d64e15274"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Use Of Diplomacy.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">In old Japan a bad young man</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of excellent capacity</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">For what perhaps among the Japs</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is known as inveracity:</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">His name was Ping or some such thing</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That jars the white auricular,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">If Yang or Hang or Matsu Pang</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">We can't be too particular!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">This sinful Ping in everything</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was guided by Old Nicholas,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">The festive youth regarded truth</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As something quite ridiculous!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Now old-time Japs were truthful chaps,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Possessed of perspicacity,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And Ping, poor pup, became hard up</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Because of his mendacity!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">But when Japan at length began</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Its barbarous ways to civilize,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">The truthful game was not the same</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Unto the brownskin swivel-eyes;</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">For diplomats in nail-can hats</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Cannot be hypercritical,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And plain unvarnished truth would mar</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">All devious schemes political.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">And so the King he sent for Ping,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Whose artfulness was sinister,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">And straight away that very day</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He made him Lord Chief Minister.</l>
<pb n="154" TEIform="pb" id="d64e15369"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">And so you see diplomacy,</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In spite of canting biases,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">Affords a hope of finding scope</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For modern Ananiases.</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e15385"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Bush Missionary.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was on old M'Carson's station, near the finish of the shearing,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">We were seated round the table in the hut, and playing loo;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">An unrighteous occupation, nor particularly cheering,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When your tally's only middling, and your luck is looking blue;</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">But there's nothing else to do,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">So it's poker or it's loo,</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In the afternoon of Saturday on Coolabungaroo!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Jack the Rat, who did the pressing, sat outside the door a-smoking,</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And a-telling all the rouseabouts of horses he had “broke,”</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And our sorrow grew distressing at the “borak” he was poking,</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When he put his head inside the hut and whispered,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">“Holy smoke;</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Here's a sanguinary joke!”</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">And he chuckled fit to choke;</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">“Here's the lanky Scotchbyterian, the missionary bloke!”</l></lg>
<pb n="155" TEIform="pb" id="d64e15438"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, he looked to see him coming, and he “took him out o'-winding,”</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He was long, and he was lanky; he was frecklesome and fair,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">And a hymn he was a-humming, just as if he was n't minding,</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">And he asked if any shearer had a mind to cut his hair!</hi></l>
<l n="20" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">We could only gape and stare,</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">'Cause we did n't like to swear!”</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">But the ringer said he'd do it, with a bucket for a chair!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">So the ringer started quickly (with the shears he was a dandy),</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But he clipped a kind of pimple and the parson gave a bound!</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Then the ringer tarred it thickly and confessed he felt “unhandy”—</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The position, for a shearer, “rather awkwardish” he found!</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Then he downed him on the ground,</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">And he whipped his neck around,</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">And he “pinked” him like a leather-neck when squatters paid a pound!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">Now, the ringer'd just got through his unaccustomed operation,</l>
<l n="31" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When M'Carson, who'd been mustering, arrived upon the scene,</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">And the shearers they were treated to a masterly oration,</l>
<l n="33" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">By the choleric M'Carson, whose vocabulary keen,</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l"> As was easy to be seen,</l>
<l n="35" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l"> Was more forcible than clean—</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And remarkably distasteful to the Reverend M'Lean!</l></lg>
<pb n="156" TEIform="pb" id="d64e15511"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">So the parson he suggested, as a means of reconciling</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(Not indeed that <hi TEIform="hi">he</hi> objected to the way they'd cut his hair;)</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">That the parties interested should agree to his beguiling</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">All the station-hands and rouseabouts with services of prayer;</l>
<l n="41" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Which the squatter thought was fair,</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">He</hi> was fond of praise and prayer!</l>
<l n="43" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And, the station-hands consenting, service started then and there!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="44" part="N" TEIform="l">Now, the preaching it was splendid, but the shearers jibbed at singing,</l>
<l n="45" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Though the squatter joined the preacher, not another soul would sing!</l>
<l n="46" part="N" TEIform="l">Then the service was upended, and M'Carson's arms went swinging,</l>
<l n="47" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he raved and stamped and cursed and swore and called us everything!</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">“<hi TEIform="hi">Sing, yer blanky beggars, sing!</hi></l>
<l n="49" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">Make the blanky welkin ring!</hi></l>
<l n="50" part="N" TEIform="l">WON'T YOU BLANKY SONS OF BLANKERS HELP THE BLANKY MAN TO SING!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="51" part="N" TEIform="l">We were sorry for the parson, though he <hi TEIform="hi">was</hi> a bit erratic,</l>
<l n="52" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">'Cause he was an all-right preacher and a decent fellow, too;</l>
<l n="53" part="N" TEIform="l">But, you see, he found M'Carson so ferociously emphatic</l>
<l n="54" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He concluded that the services in future would n't do.</l>
<l n="55" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">So the shearers play at loo,</l>
<l n="56" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">And at whisky-poker, too,</l>
<l n="57" part="N" TEIform="l">And the parson is a scarcity at Coolabungaroo!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e15594"><pb n="157" TEIform="pb" id="d64e15595"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Shearers' Cook.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Now, shearers' cooks, as shearers know,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Are very seldom wont to blow;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">But when I took to dabbing tar</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">And “picking up” on Blaringar,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">The cook, when “barbers” came at morn</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">To get a snack, would say, with scorn:</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">“Tea on the left,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Coffee on the right,</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Brownie on the bunk, and blast yez!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">The “bunk” or slab was in the hut,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And on it “brownie” ready cut;</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Two buckets o'er the fire would be—</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">One filled with coffee, one with tea;</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And when the chaps came filing in</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">The cook would say, with mirthless grin:</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">“Tea on the left,</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Coffee on the right,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">Brownie on the bunk, and blast yez!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Peculiar man, this shearers' cook,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">And had a very ugly look.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">To me—a new-chum rouseabout,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">Said he, one day when all were out:</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">“There's nothing in this world, my lad,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">That's worth your worry, good or bad;</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Grief on the left,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Sorrow on the right,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">Trouble on the bunk, but blast it!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e15687"><pb n="158" TEIform="pb" id="d64e15688"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Tugs Of Simpsonville.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">He was dirty, dark and artful, and they called him “Salt-bush Bill,”</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">But we did n't recognise him when he came to Simpsonville;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">It's a sort of one-horse township out beyond the Cobar track,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the sun's a perfect scorcher and the dust would choke a black!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Hot? Great Scot!</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">It was Hell, with some improvements—worse than Booligal, a lot!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Saltbush Bill arrived at sundown; called for Hennessy's “three-star,”</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">And he shouted for the jackeroos a-standing in the bar,</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And he introduced the subject when he'd liquored up.</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Says he:</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">“I'm no English duke or nobleman a-tracking round; not me!</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Shout? No doubt!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">But I ain't a bloomin' squatter nor a shearer just cut out!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">“I'm in Simpsonville on business and I claim to represent,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">The most wonderful neuralgia cure that any could invent,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">And it's known as ‘Brown's Neuralgia Dice'; the price a bob a die,</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And you rub it where the pain is and the pain is bound to fly!</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Sell? Oh well,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Just you wait till I have finished and you'll have a chance to tell!”</l></lg>
<pb n="159" TEIform="pb" id="d64e15753"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Then he brings a pickle-bottle and he puts it on the bar;</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">(It was full of peas and fastened down) and says: “Now, there you are!</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">I'm the liberalest bagman that was ever on the rounds;</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">If you guess how many peas is there you get five blanky pounds!</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Fair? <hi TEIform="hi">and</hi> square!</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">And the nearest guess will get the gonce as sure as you are there!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, of course we goes to rush it, but he says: “One moment there!</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">I am no escaped loon<hi TEIform="hi">at</hi>ic nor eccentric millionaire!</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">I'm no travelling convalescent and I ain't been very ill,</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">Nor come to view the scenery surrounding Simpsonville!</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Yes! You guess,</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">But you have to buy a bob's worth of the cure! Well, here's success!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">“Now I want a hundred guesses, which will make the fiver sure,</l>
<l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">And the landlord holds the money just to see you all secure,</l>
<l n="34" part="N" TEIform="l">And I leaves a hundred samples of the cure inside the bar</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">Which he sells, and pays the money to the winner.</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There you are!</l>
<l n="37" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Me? I'll gee!</l>
<l n="38" part="N" TEIform="l">I must introduce the remedy in other towns, you see!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">In the morning came a swaggie with “Matilda” 'cross the flat,</l>
<l n="40" part="N" TEIform="l">Whom we recognised immediate as a bloke called Jack the Rat;</l>
<pb n="160" TEIform="pb" id="d64e15830"/>
<l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">And he listened to the story, then went over to the store</l>
<l n="42" part="N" TEIform="l">And he bought dry peas in bagfuls till there was n't any more.</l>
<l n="43" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Rot? 'T was not!</l>
<l n="44" part="N" TEIform="l">Why you have n't got a notion what a head that bloke had got!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">Now it first struck Joe the Spieler it would be as good as gold,</l>
<l n="46" part="N" TEIform="l">For to get a pickle-bottle and see just what it would hold.</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">He was always on for pointing, and as artful as you please;</l>
<l n="48" part="N" TEIform="l">But he went all round the township and he could n't get no peas!</l>
<l n="49" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">See? Not a pea!</l>
<l n="50" part="N" TEIform="l">It was just the same with Jackson and with Dogherty and me!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="51" part="N" TEIform="l">And the bobs they kept on coming in; the time was drawing nigh;</l>
<l n="52" part="N" TEIform="l">Joe was savage, so was Dogherty and Jackson, so was I!</l>
<l n="53" part="N" TEIform="l">Spare me days, I think the lot of us was looking after peas!</l>
<l n="54" part="N" TEIform="l">When one day I meets that Jack the Rat as simple as you please.</l>
<l n="55" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">“Me? Got peas!</l>
<l n="56" part="N" TEIform="l">Yes, I'll sell you, at two bob a pint, as many as you please!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="57" part="N" TEIform="l">It was something like six times the price, but what was I to do?</l>
<l n="58" part="N" TEIform="l">So I bought 'em, and found afterwards that others bought 'em, too.</l>
<pb n="161" TEIform="pb" id="d64e15891"/>
<l n="59" part="N" TEIform="l">Jack the Rat was so delighted with his honest trade's success</l>
<l n="60" part="N" TEIform="l">That he shouted for a dozen, and he also took a guess.</l>
<l n="61" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Swear? Well, there,</l>
<l n="62" part="N" TEIform="l">It would simply freeze the marrow in a bullock-driver's hair!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="63" part="N" TEIform="l">When we had the bottle opened, it was not half-full of peas,</l>
<l n="64" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">For a corncob in the centre took the space up, if you please!</hi></l>
<l n="65" part="N" TEIform="l">And the clever blokes who measured, they were out by half-a-mile;</l>
<l n="66" part="N" TEIform="l">It was Jack the Rat who won it, and he wore a peaceful smile!</l>
<l n="67" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Toast? Great Ghost!</l>
<l n="68" part="N" TEIform="l">In about a week the landlord got this letter by the post.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="69" part="N" TEIform="l">“We had things to do in Melbourne, so we thought we'd get away,</l>
<l n="70" part="N" TEIform="l">But desire, as we are leaving, most respectfully to say,</l>
<l n="71" part="N" TEIform="l">That we're thankful for the kindness of the tugs of Simpsonville,</l>
<l n="72" part="N" TEIform="l">And remain, yours most respectful, Jack the Rat <hi TEIform="hi">and Saltbush Bill</hi>.”</l>
<l n="73" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Catch 'em? No hope!</l>
<l n="74" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">And the “remedy” was little squares cut out of bars of soap!</hi></l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e15950"><pb n="162" TEIform="pb" id="d64e15951"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Mulligan's Shanty.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Things is just the same as ever</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">On the outer Never-Never,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And you look to find the stock of liquor scanty;</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But we found things worse than ordin'ry,</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And in fact a bit <hi TEIform="hi">ex</hi>traordin'ry,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">When myself and Bill the Pinker struck the shanty.</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Shanty?” says you. “What shanty?”</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Why, Mulligan's shanty!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">I says “Whisky”; Bill says “Brandy”;</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But there was n't either handy,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">For the boss was out of liquor in that line.</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Well, I'll try a rum,” says Billy.</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Got no rum,” he answers, chilly,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">“But I'll recommend a decent drop o' <hi TEIform="hi">tine</hi>.”</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Tine?” says Bill; “what tine?”</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Why, turpentine!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Blow me blue!” says Bill the Pinker,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Can't yer give us a deep-sinker?</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Ain't yer got a cask o' beer behind the screen?”</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Bill was getting pretty cranky,</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But there was n't any swanky.</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">Says the landlord, “Why not try a drop o' <hi TEIform="hi">sene</hi>?”</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Sene?” says Bill; “what sene?”</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Why, kerosene!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, we would n't spend a tanner,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But the boss's pleasant manner</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">All our cursing could n't easily demolish.</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Says he, “Strike me perpendic'lar</l>
<l n="29" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But you beggars <hi TEIform="hi">are</hi> partic'lar,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">Why, the squatter in the parlour's drinking polish!”</l>
<l n="31" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Polish?” says Bill; “what polish?”</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Why, furniture-polish!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e16072"><pb n="163" TEIform="pb" id="d64e16073"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">McCulloch's Chump.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was on a farm, a farm whose charm</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Lay in the fact that binders</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Got decent pay, six bob a day,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And no midnight reminders!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">That is to say, we worked all <hi TEIform="hi">day;</hi></l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Worked hard, there's no disguising;</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">But heard no shout to rouse us out</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Because the moon was rising!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was in the days of simpler ways,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">'Fore strippers struck Australia;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">When goose-neck bands and human hands</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Beat all the paraphernalia!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">There was a lout, a slack-built lout,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was binding at McCulloch's,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Weighed sixteen stone, all brawn and bone,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And calves as big as bullocks!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">This raw-boned dolt could break a colt,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And, if it came to fighting,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Could take his part; but lacked the art</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Of reading and of writing.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Said he to me one night at tea:</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“I hope my girl is better,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">D'yer think yer'd find—that is—d'yer mind—</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Er—would yer write a letter?”</l></lg>
<pb n="164" TEIform="pb" id="d64e16158"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">The “things” were found. All hands sat sound,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The raw-boned chap dictating;</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">“Tell her,” said he, “I hopes that she</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Won't get too tired o' waiting.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">“You'd better tell her I'm quite well</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And hope at time o' startin'</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">That she's the same. Yes, Meg's her name,</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">I told yer Marg'ret Martin!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">“You got that down? Well, say Jack Brown</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is chirpy as a plover;</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">And tell her—why—that—is—that I—</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You know—just say I love her!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">“You might just say I ain't too gay,</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But anxious to be over.</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">Got that all right? Well, now you might</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Say just once more I love her!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">“What else? Say chaff is three 'n' a half</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And season's right for clover,</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">And spuds is down to half-a-crown,</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And—better say I love her!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">“That's all. You sign my name, Devine.”</l>
<l n="46" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“No more?” asked I, inditing.</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">He scratched his head and calmly said:</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Put ‘<hi TEIform="hi">Please excuse bad writing!</hi>' ”</l></lg>
<pb n="165" TEIform="pb" id="d64e16242"/>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e16246"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Daley's Dorg Wattle.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">“You can talk about yer sheep dorgs,” said the man from Allan's Creek,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“But I know a dorg that simply knocked 'em bandy!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Do whatever you would show him, and you'd hardly need to speak.</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Owned by Daley, drover cove in Jackandandy.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">“We was talkin' in the parlor, me and Daley, quiet like,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When a blow-fly starts a-buzzin' round the ceilin',</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Up gets Daley, and he says to me, You wait a minute, Mike,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And I'll show you what a dorg he is at heelin'.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">“And an empty pickle-bottle was a-standin' on the shelf,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Daley takes it down and puts it on the table,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And he bets me drinks that blinded dorg would do it by himself—</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And I did n't think as how as he was able!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">“Well, he shows the dorg the bottle, and he points up to the fly,</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he shuts the door, and says to him—‘Now, Wattle!'</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And in less than fifteen seconds, spare me days, it ain't a lie,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That there dorg had got that inseck in the bottle?”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e16303"><pb n="166" TEIform="pb" id="d64e16304"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Chinaman Lee's Receipt.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Attorney Magee, of Millagadee,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">He had for a client one Timothy Lee,</l>
<l n="3" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">A Chinaman he;</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">But christened, you see,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">A Sunday-school scholar of Millagadee,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Where charming young ladies</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Preach Heaven and Hades</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">To simpering Chinkies of humble degree.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Attorney Magee collected a fee</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">For services rendered to Chinaman Lee.</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Said Timothy Lee:</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">“My Missee Magee</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">What for you no give it leceiptee for me?</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">No Chinaman cheatee,</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">My want it leceiptee,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Much better you give it,” said Chinaman Lee.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Attorney Magee objected that he</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">Would be hanged if he'd give a receipt for a fee</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">To a blanketty B</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Of a heathen Chinee!</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">[His language, you'll notice, was painfully free,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And better befitting</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">A Parliament sitting,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">Or bibulous bullockies out for a spree!]</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">But Chinaman Lee propounded a plea:</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">“Suppose you no give it leceiptee,” said he,</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">“Me die, and you see,</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">The Lord askee me;</l>
<pb n="167" TEIform="pb" id="d64e16399"/>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">‘You allee same Clistian in Millagadee?</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">You got it clean sheetee?</l>
<l n="31" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Nobody you cheatee?</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">You got it leceiptee flom Missee Magee!' ”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">Said Chinaman Lee to Attorney Magee:</l>
<l n="34" part="N" TEIform="l">“Me say you no give it leceiptee for fee!</l>
<l n="35" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">The Lord He tell me</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">‘Go lookee for he;</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">No halo can get till leceiptee me see!'</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">No likee Him tellee</l>
<l n="39" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Look all over hellee</l>
<l n="40" part="N" TEIform="l">With devils and lawyers for Missee Magee!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e16442"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Mulga Flat.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">He was very bright and chirpy was the man from Mulga Flat,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">He was jolly, he was pleasant, he was short and he was fat,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And we welcomed him of evenings when he called to have a chat,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">And he talked about the pleasant times they had at Mulga Flat.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">When he calmly chewed tobacco, very skilfully he spat</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Through the broken pane he noticed in the window where he sat,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And he told us every evening that he often whipped the cat</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">'Cause he left the scenes of childhood down in good old Mulga Flat.</l></lg>
<pb n="168" TEIform="pb" id="d64e16472"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">When we had a game of cricket it was—“ever hear of Mat?</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Mat McGinnis? By the hokey, he was just the bloke to bat!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Got five fourers in an over, neat and slick, and clean and pat,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">And you bet there were some bowlers too, away at Mulga Flat!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And it got the same with everything whatever it might be,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">It was “Mulga this” and “Mulga that” for breakfast and for tea.</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">When we buried poor old Johnson from the Yarrans—even <hi TEIform="hi">that</hi>—</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">It was nothing to the funerals they had at Mulga Flat!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">We had concerts which were “middling,” we had dances which were “fair,”</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">And our football games were “decent”—but were nothing to compare</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">With the Mulga Flat amusements, for the champions had been at</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Every blessed kind of junket that was held at Mulga Flat!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, we stood him for a season, but we bounced him pretty soon,</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">For we hate a barrel-organ that can only play one tune;</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">But in every town, you'll notice, there is someone with a rat,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">Who for ever keeps on magging of some place like Mulga Flat!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e16531"><pb n="169" TEIform="pb" id="d64e16532"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">A Matter Of Knack.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Jock M‘Pherson was a person who was boastful in conversin',</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But respectable and ponderous and dignified withal!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Con M‘Carty was a party who was something of a smarty,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And beside the big M‘Pherson looked particularly small;</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But Cornelius M‘Carty, he was artful, after all!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">When Cornelius M‘Carty thought M‘Pherson was his dart, he</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Made a wager he would carry him a mile along the track;</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Which, considering M‘Pherson was a very weighty person,</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Was a risky undertaking for M‘Carty's little back.</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But Cornelius protested it depended on the knack!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">“Take yer coat off!” called M‘Carty, and M‘Pherson gave a start, he</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Had n't bargained for proceedings the reverse of dignified!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">But he felt he had the best of the arrangement. “Take yer vest off!”</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Said M‘Carty; and M‘Pherson very graciously complied.</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">It was in the private parlor, and the crowd was all outside.</l></lg>
<pb n="170" TEIform="pb" id="d64e16584"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">“Take yer boots off!” said M‘Carty in a cheerful tone and hearty,</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But M‘Pherson he objected that the crowd would see his toes.</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">Said M‘Carty: “See, M‘Pherson, there ain't any sense in cursin',</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Take yer boots off, I don't reckon to be handicapped with those!</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">I am not the sort of Juggins you apparently suppose!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">This M‘Pherson's wrath arouses. “But,” said he, “I'll keep me trousers!”</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Not a trouser!” said M‘Carty, “or to me the wager goes.</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">The conditions you're reversin'; I will carry <hi TEIform="hi">you</hi>, M‘Pherson,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But the wager does n't say a blessed word about yer <hi TEIform="hi">clothes!</hi>”</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">That was how the small M‘Carty had M‘Pherson by the nose!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e16626"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The M‘Camley Mixture.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Jack M‘Camley,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Lank and long,</l>
<l n="3" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Ox-persuader,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Billabong.</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Bluff and hearty</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Sort o' party,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Got the “blanky” habit strong!</l></lg>
<pb n="171" TEIform="pb" id="d64e16653"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Says the parson,</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Bright old bird,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Why'd you use that</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Horrid word?—</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(Jack looked grinful)—</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Not say sinful,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">But most vulgar and absurd!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“It's the blanky</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Church, betwixt</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You and me, that</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Got me fixed!”</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Says M‘Camley,</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">“In our fam'ly</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Things is all so blanky mixed!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“There's me father—</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Whoa back, Dick!—</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Church o' Blanky</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">England, stric!</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">There's me mother</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">And</hi> one brother,</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">Roman—Blanky—Catholic!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="29" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“But me sister—</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Way, you Stan!</l>
<l n="31" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Don't them bullocks</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Rile a man?</l>
<l n="33" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Kilts enticed her,</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Went and spliced a</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">Presby—Blanky—terian!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e16751"><pb n="172" TEIform="pb" id="d64e16752"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">A Snake Yarn.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">“You talk of snakes,” said Jack the Rat,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“But blow me, one hot summer,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">I seen a thing that knocked me flat—</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Fourteen foot long or more than that,</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">It was a reg'lar hummer!</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Lay right along a sort of bog,</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Just like a log!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">“The ugly thing was lyin' there</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And not a sign o' movin',</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Give any man a nasty scare;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Seen nothin' like it anywhere</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Since I first started drovin'.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And yet it did n't scare my dog.</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">Looked</hi> like a log!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">“I had to cross that bog, yer see,</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And bluey I was humpin';</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">But wonderin' what that thing could be</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">A-lyin' there in front o' me</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">I did n't feel like jumpin'.</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Yet, though I shivered like a frog,</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">It <hi TEIform="hi">seemed</hi> a log!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">“I takes a leap and lands right on</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The back of that there whopper!”</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">He stopped. We waited. Then Big Mac</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Remarked: “Well, then, what happened, Jack?”</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Not much,” said Jack, and drained his grog.</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">“It <hi TEIform="hi">was</hi> a log?”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e16854"><pb n="173" TEIform="pb" id="d64e16855"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Pullyerleg!</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Yes; I came from up the country where the paddy-melons grow,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">An excursion trip to Sydney for the Agriwebster Show,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And I thought as I was just as smart as any chaps in town,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">And I reckoned there was no one as was like to take me down.</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Bet yer life that I was spry,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Up to snuff and fairly fly!</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, a youngster from the country can be smart, and so was I!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">First my mother started cryin', said the Plague was awful bad.</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">“Oh, the only plague'll bother him is women,” answered Dad.</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Mother said she reckoned father was a most disgustin' Pa,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">But he said <hi TEIform="hi">he</hi>'d been to Sydney long before he married Ma!</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And I could n't help but think</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">That he winked a sinful wink</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">As he said: “Don't you fear nothink; just be careful what you drink!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">But my mother got me camphor-cakes and things; she would n't stop</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Till I swear I smelt uncommon like a blessed chemist's shop!</l>
<pb n="174" TEIform="pb" id="d64e16915"/>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">“This is Bifkin's Paralytic” (her pronunciation's vague)</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">“Which they tell me,” says my mother, “will preserve you from the Plague.”</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, of course, I thought it rot</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">But I took it all—why not?</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And one morning in the city emptied out the rotten lot!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">Spare me days! It's great in Sydney when you ain't too short of cash,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And you have n't got to raise a “sprat” to get a plate of hash.</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">And the fly blokes! They aint nothin' to the coves at Diggers' Flat.</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">Strike me pink! but Bill the Ringer'd show they don't know where they're at!</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh! I felt I was a pearl</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">In the gay and giddy whirl,</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">But it happened I encountered quite a scrumptious little girl!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">My Australian Affidavit! But she was a little plum!</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">Cottoned up to me immediate, no standoffishness like some.</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">Pleasant, trim-built little party, cuddlesome and neat, you know,</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">And the first thing that she asked me: “Would I take her to the Show?”</l>
<l n="33" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Would I take her? I should smile!</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">I should snigger!! Just my style!!!</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">Fresh and fair and plump and wholesome, innocent and free from guile!</l></lg>
<pb n="175" TEIform="pb" id="d64e16980"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="36" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, we saw the Agriwebster on the followin' afternoon.</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">(Decent Show, the Diggers' Flat blokes may get something like it soon.)</l>
<l n="38" part="N" TEIform="l">But she simply knocked me bandy when she smiled and said: “Good-bye!</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">Here's my brother come to fetch me!” Strike me purple! where was I?</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Off they went—left me to stare!</l>
<l n="41" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">“<hi TEIform="hi">Where's my purse!</hi>” I yelled and sware.</l>
<l n="42" part="N" TEIform="l">Strike me fat!! I felt my pocket!!! And so help me!!!! IT WAS THERE!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e17009"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Football.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">What gives to Winter time its zest,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Expands your lungs and swells your chest,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">What is a tomfool game at best?</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Why, football!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">What barks your shins and “busts” your tile</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And rips your pants in festive style:</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">What makes the surgeon softly smile?</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Why, football!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">What though it be a dangerous game?</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Without some danger sport is tame,</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And so we love it all the same,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Our football!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e17053"><pb n="176" TEIform="pb" id="d64e17054"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Guile Of Dad M'ginnis.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">When M'Ginnis struck the mining camp at Jamberoora Creek</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">His behaviour was appreciated highly;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">For, although he was a quiet man, in manner mild and meek,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Not like ordinary swagmen with a monumental cheek,</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">He became the admiration of the camp along the creek</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">'Cause he showed a point to Kangaroobie Riley!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Both the pubs at Jamberoora had some grog that stood the test</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">(Not to speak of what was manufactured slyly!)</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">And the hostel of O'Gorman, which was called “The Diggers' Rest,”</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Was, O'Gorman said, the finest house of any in the west;</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">But it was a burning question if it really WAS the best,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Or the “Miners' ”—kept by Kangaroobie Riley.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Dad M'Ginnis called at Riley's. Said he “felt a trifle queer,”</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">And with something like a wan and weary smile, he</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Said he “thought he'd try a whisky.” Pushed it back and said “I fear</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">I had better take a brandy.” Passed THAT back and said: “Look here,</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Take the brandy; after all, I think I'll have a pint of beer!”</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">And he drank the health of Kangaroobie Riley!</l></lg>
<pb n="177" TEIform="pb" id="d64e17115"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Where's the money?” asked the publican; “you'll have to pay, begad!”</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">“Gave the brandy for the beer!” said Dad the wily,</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">“And I handed you the whisky when I took the brandy, lad!”</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">“But you paid not for the whisky!” answered Riley.</l>
<l n="23" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l"> “No,” said Dad,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">“<hi TEIform="hi">And you don't expect a man to pay for what he never had!</hi>”</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">—'T was the logic flattened Kangaroobie Riley!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">“See,” said Kangaroobie Riley, “you have had me, that is clear!</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">But I never mind a joke,” he added dryly.</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">“Just you work it on O'Gorman, and I'll shout another beer!”</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">“I'd be happy to oblige yer,” said M‘Ginnis with a leer,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">“But the fact about the matter is—O'GORMAN SENT ME HERE!—</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">So, good morning, Mr. Kangaroobie Riley!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e17164"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">All Same “Pinafore.”</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There was a girl in Marrickville who walked along the street,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But sad to say, she had n't travelled far,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">When she slipped upon the footpath which they'd lately tarred so neat,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was “the merry, merry maiden and the tar!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e17182"><pb n="178" TEIform="pb" id="d64e17183"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Spielers And The Girl.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">It was in the humble parlour of a Brisbane public-house,</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">There was James and there was Joseph and The Girl.</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">James and Joseph they were spielers of considerable <hi TEIform="hi">nous</hi>,</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">And possessed the style and manners of an earl.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Very ugly were the attributes of Joseph and of James,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">For they earned an easy living by acquiring artful games</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Which the magistrates are apt to call by very nasty names,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">And the trusted silent partner was The Girl.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">James had lately struck a notion of a quite uncommon kind,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">And explained it unto Joseph and The Girl.</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">He had bought two hundred packs of cards as good as he could find,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was a scheme to make a parson's whiskers curl.</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">He would go as far as Adelaide and not attempt to sell,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">But would leave some packs as samples, free at every large hotel,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And would quote a price absurdly low (and mark the backs as well).</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was a plan approved by Joseph and The Girl!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Joseph had to stay in Brisbane till he got a wire from James.</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">(I should mention it was James that owned The Girl.)</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Then he'd go by boat to Adelaide and there begin the games,</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Working back by rail to Brisbane and The Girl.</l>
<pb n="179" TEIform="pb" id="d64e17255"/>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">See the dodge? <hi TEIform="hi">One</hi> spieler left the cards along the route</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">While the <hi TEIform="hi">other</hi> had to play the games and gather in the loot.</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Fair division of the proceeds, and to save all coarse dispute,</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">All the cash to go to Brisbane to The Girl.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">James and Joseph met in Adelaide, where James soon made it plain</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">Which hotels would have the sample cards on hand.</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">James then took the boat for Brisbane while his partner took the train—</l>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was as neat a spieler's plot as e'er was planned!</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">But when James got back to Brisbane, then The Girl explained to Jim</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">That his partner had persuaded her to be untrue to him!</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">There was language filled the atmosphere that made the gas burn dim!</l>
<l n="32" part="N" TEIform="l">Still, The Girl had got the coin, you understand!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">Like all ladies who deceive their lords, The Girl was full of woe,</l>
<l n="34" part="N" TEIform="l">For her one and only love, of course, was Jim!</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">And she sobbed and sighed and murmured that “she really did n't know</l>
<l n="36" part="N" TEIform="l">What came over her to be untrue to him!”</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">But The Girl had got the plunder, and she counselled Jim to wait</l>
<l n="38" part="N" TEIform="l">Until Joe got through Victoria, and she got desperate.</l>
<pb n="180" TEIform="pb" id="d64e17323"/>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">For “she loved him, and for Joseph she had nothing else but hate!”</l>
<l n="40" part="N" TEIform="l">She was loaded with repentance to the brim!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">Now, when Joe arrived at Goulburn he had done extremely well,</l>
<l n="42" part="N" TEIform="l">And the coin had gone to Brisbane to The Girl!</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">But the luck changed all at once, and how it did he could n't tell,</l>
<l n="44" part="N" TEIform="l">The disaster set his senses all a-whirl.</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">For the cards appeared to be the same, and yet he went to smash,</l>
<l n="46" part="N" TEIform="l">And the “Solo Whist Conspiracy” became a frightful hash!</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">By the time he got to Sydney he had just sufficient cash</l>
<l n="48" part="N" TEIform="l">To return to James and Brisbane and The Girl!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="49" part="N" TEIform="l">When poor Joseph got to Brisbane blank despair awaited him!</l>
<l n="50" part="N" TEIform="l">Empty house! No Jim! No home!! No cash!!! No Girl!!!!</l>
<l n="51" part="N" TEIform="l">But the landlord found a letter which was left behind by Jim,</l>
<l n="52" part="N" TEIform="l">And for shortness and for sharpness t was a pearl:—</l>
<l n="53" part="N" TEIform="l">“When I found, my old friend Joseph, that The Girl you'd tried to hug,</l>
<l n="54" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">I went back as far as Goulburn!</hi> Changed the cards to fool a tug!</l>
<l n="55" part="N" TEIform="l">But, good-bye, old man! I'm sorry that you took me for a mug!</l>
<l n="56" part="N" TEIform="l">I am off to-day to 'Frisco with The Girl!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e17386"><pb n="181" TEIform="pb" id="d64e17387"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Four O'Clock Baby.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">She's fair and plump, a perfect peach,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">A daisy and a gem;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">But every morn, as sure's yer born</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">At four o'clock a.m.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">She's wide awake and coos and laughs,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And kicks the clothes 'n a heap;</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">It ain't no use, she scorns abuse,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And won't let nobody sleep!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">No, she won't let nobody sleep, she won't,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">She don't let nobody sleep, she don't,</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">She crows and kicks</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">From four to six,</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And won't let nobody sleep!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">Of course, it's better to laugh than cry,</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">It's well to laugh and sing;</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">But “Dickory Dock” at four o'clock</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is certainly not the thing!</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">So folks retire at eight p.m.</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(Ridiculous hour to keep!)</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Because she won't, she can't, she don't,</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She won't let nobody sleep!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">No, she won't let nobody sleep, she won't,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">She don't let nobody sleep, she don't,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">She crows and kicks</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">From four to six,</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">And won't let nobody sleep!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e17477"><pb n="182" TEIform="pb" id="d64e17478"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Man Who Always Runs To Catch The Tram.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">He's the latest evolution of a prehistoric type—</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The man who always runs to catch the tram!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">He's never got the time to light his after-breakfast pipe—</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The man who has to run to catch the tram!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">He is all a ball of energy and vigour; could n't wait!</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">It is worse to be too early than it is to be too late!</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">He'll be rushing up the garden path when Peter slams the gate—</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The man that has to run to catch the tram!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">You can take him in his business; I'll bet you ten to one—</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The man who has to run to catch the tram!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">That he's always in a hurry, and there's mighty little done—</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The same as when he's running for the tram!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Does n't matter if a lawyer at the starting of the term,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">Or the “I'll-be-there-directly!” of a tea and sugar firm—</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">It is still to-day the early bird that gathers in the worm;</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Not the bird who has to run to catch the tram!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e17535"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">How To Become Immortal.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">There was a scribbler wrote a joke,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Which he considered clever;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">A negro minstrel took it up,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And now 't will live for ever!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e17553"><pb n="183" TEIform="pb" id="d64e17554"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">A Bunch Of Roses.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">In a calm and peaceful suburb</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(Not the suburb you suppose)</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Lived a happy, homely couple</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Who enjoyed the name of Rose.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">“What is in a name?” asks Shakespeare,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Which is smart in many ways,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Seeing it was Francis Bacon</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Really wrote the Shakespeare plays!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">Mr. Rose wrote pretty verses,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And composed sweet tunes by turns—</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Rhyming friends oft called him “Mozart,”</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Fiddlers called him “Robbie Burns.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Yet he had poetic fancies</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(Which no kindly person blames),</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And he thought to call his offspring</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">By appropriate Christian names.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">As the heir of all the Roses,</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Owner of a piping squeal,</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Showed a great desire for fighting</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He was christened “Marshal Niel.”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">And the little girl who followed</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In due order after him</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Was so calm, sedate, and gentle,</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">She, of course, was labelled “Prim.”</l></lg>
<pb n="184" TEIform="pb" id="d64e17637"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">One was “Moss” and one was “China,”</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">One was “Cabbage”—and 't is said,</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">When this lass grew up and married,</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Her good husband's name was Head!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">“Cabbage Rose” is not too pretty</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For a lady gently bred;</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">But I'd sooner have a number</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Than a name like “Cabbage Head!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">“Blush Rose,” she became a barmaid</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(This was offspring number six),</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">And I need not add that “Tea Rose”</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Stumbled into politics!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">One was brought up on the bottle;</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Sturdy laddie, not too fat.</l>
<l n="39" part="N" TEIform="l">He, of course, was baptised “Tuber,”</l>
<l n="40" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Any fool would think of that!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">“Banksia Rose,” she wed the banker—</l>
<l n="42" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Most appropriate, you'll allow!</l>
<l n="43" part="N" TEIform="l">(It was long before the “crisis”;</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">He's “Financial Agent” now!)</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">Number Ten was christened “Native”</l>
<l n="46" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(Married somebody named Black!)</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">And eleven was called “Baby”</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">(She's the old maid of the pack!)</l></lg>
<pb n="185" TEIform="pb" id="d64e17718"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="49" part="N" TEIform="l">And the last, who made the dozen</l>
<l n="50" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In this Bunch of Roses fair;</l>
<l n="51" part="N" TEIform="l">They were lost what name to give her,</l>
<l n="52" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And were feeling in despair.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="53" part="N" TEIform="l">“Call her ‘Wild,' ” remarked the mother,</l>
<l n="54" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“ ‘Wild Rose' sounds a charming name,”</l>
<l n="55" part="N" TEIform="l">Which suggestion was adopted,</l>
<l n="56" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And the final trouble came.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="57" part="N" TEIform="l">Wild Rose grew a lovely maiden,</l>
<l n="58" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Fresh and sweet and beautiful</l>
<l n="59" part="N" TEIform="l">Like her name—till she was married!</l>
<l n="60" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For her husband's name was Bull!!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e17761"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Advice.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When you're down in the dumps,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And you suffer from mumps,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">And are fit for a funeral party,</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You should open your jaw</l>
<l n="5" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In a roaring guffaw,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And a laugh that is noisy and hearty.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="7" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And you'll certainly find,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If you bear it in mind,</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">That it's rather a different labour</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To keep a good heart</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In a difficult part,</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Than to give the advice to your neighbour.</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e17804"><pb n="186" TEIform="pb" id="d64e17805"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">“Mulga And Wattle.”</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Now settle you down, and I won't be long,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">I'm trying to do my best;</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">I'm singin' a sort of a kind of a song</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">To men in the weary West.</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">I'm not too good, but I ain't too slow</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">At slingin' a jinglin' rhyme;</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">But each of us,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">All of us,</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Big and the small of us,</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Large and the little, and short and the tall of us</l>
<l n="11" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Look for a break in</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">The workin' and wakin'—</l>
<l n="13" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Especially Christmas Time!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">They say you're rough in the weary West,</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And your cheeks are tanned and dark,</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">But I never could see that a man was best</l>
<l n="17" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">With the style of a barber's clerk!</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">The dudes and mashers are much the same</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In every land and clime;</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">But some of us,</l>
<l n="21" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Most of us,</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Pretty fair host of us,</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Gather and honour the 'Stralian toast of us—</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">“Mulga and Wattle!”</l>
<l n="25" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">And empty a bottle—</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Especially Christmas Time!</l></lg>
<pb n="187" TEIform="pb" id="d64e17893"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">Well, here's good luck to the Western fold!</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">May your courage never be dead</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">Till you stick your pick in a nugget of gold</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As big as a statesman's head!</l>
<l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">As big as his head, but not so thick—</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">For greed is a dreadful crime!</l>
<l n="33" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">So blowers or tailers,</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Though Gropers or Walers,</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">Or pearl-fishing jokers who think you are sailors,</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">Just up with the bottle</l>
<l n="37" rend="indent2" part="N" TEIform="l">To “Mulga and Wattle!</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Australia Every Time!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e17934"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Only A Moderate Mania.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Darling,” she said, “if I were gone,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Would you be sad or glad?”</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">“Oh, talk not in that dismal tone!”</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Said he: “ 'T would drive me mad!”</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">“And would you marry again?” she sighed</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">In tender tones and sad.</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">“Well, no,” her better half replied,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">“I would n't be quite THAT mad!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e17966"><pb n="188" TEIform="pb" id="d64e17967"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Way Of It.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">Australian views of charity</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Are something very sweet!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">We must subscribe to squatters when</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They raise the price of meat;</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">And then the farmers must be helped,</l>
<l n="6" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They're suffering, 't is said,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">They get the help, and straight away</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They raise the price of bread!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">I have no wish to jest and jibe,</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And yet it seems to me</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">The more the generous subscribe</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The dearer things will be!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">And if the more the people give</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The more they have to pay,</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Who really suffers through the drought</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Will someone kindly say?</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e18024"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Burns Amended.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">“Oh, wad some power the giftie gie us</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">To see oorselves as ithers see us,</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">It wad frae mony a blunder free us</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And foolish notion.”</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">But if some power the giftie'd gie us</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">To make those other people see us</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">As we perceive ourselves, 't would free us</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">From much commotion!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e18055"><pb n="189" TEIform="pb" id="d64e18056"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">“The Little Brown Egotist.”</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">He's an entertaining midget, an amusing marionette,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Is the copper-coloured kinchin from Japan!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">His superior for skiting is n't likely to be met</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">If you travel from Beersheba up to Dan!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">He's been savage forty centuries and civilised a week,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And his swollen self-importance is amazing, so to speak,</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">And the largest part about him is his monumental cheek,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When he blathers of the greatness of Japan!</l>
<l n="9" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh Lord!</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">You'd think Adam was Mikado of Japan!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Why, the self-asserting Yankee whom we used to think a bore,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">By comparison is quite a nervous man!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">There's nothing you can show the Jap he did n't know before;</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">They have just the same or better in Japan!</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">The American's retiring! He is modest! He is meek!</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">He is humble! He is bashful! He is timorous and weak!</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">He is shy and coy and timid, and his blushes dye his cheek</l>
<l n="18" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">As he shrinks before the boaster from Japan!</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Great Scot!</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">The United States is nothing to Japan!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">He'll admit that our Australian moon at times is fairly bright—</l>
<l n="22" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But it's nothing like the moon that's in Japan!</l>
<pb n="190" TEIform="pb" id="d64e18131"/>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">And the sun we have may show a very decent sort of light—</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">But you ought to see the sun that's in Japan!</l>
<l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">He and Bull, you know, are partners in the ruling of the sea,</l>
<l n="26" part="N" TEIform="l">Which preposterous alliance from the first has seemed to me</l>
<l n="27" part="N" TEIform="l">Something very like an elephant assisted by a flea,</l>
<l n="28" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Or a mastiff by a pocket black-and-tan!</l>
<l n="29" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">What oh!</l>
<l n="30" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Just imagine Bull defended by Japan!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="31" part="N" TEIform="l">Oh, this small brown bunch of bumptiousness is sweet to contemplate!</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Such a vain and egotistic little man;</l>
<l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">He is very fond of saying that his country's “up-to-date,”</l>
<l n="34" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he seems to think his country leads the van!</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">He is “up-to-date” in everything, and likes to tell you so!</l>
<l n="36" part="N" TEIform="l">“Up-to-date” in army, navy and in commerce! Full of go!</l>
<l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">“Up-to-date!” Just like the baby that was born to-day, you know!</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And for skite! Don't talk of Cousin Jonathan! Oh no!</l>
<l n="39" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Uncle Sam was never in it with Japan!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="40" part="N" TEIform="l">He has three or four small islands, long and narrow, chiefly coast,</l>
<l n="41" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And he's christened them “The Empire of Japan!!”</l>
<l n="42" part="N" TEIform="l">They're as big as Garden Island; not much larger at the most,</l>
<l n="43" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">And their owner is a cocky little man!</l>
<pb n="191" TEIform="pb" id="d64e18201"/>
<l n="44" part="N" TEIform="l">But he's very energetic; you must give him that bit in!</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">And the wit's not regulated by the colour of the skin!</l>
<l n="46" part="N" TEIform="l">And the only fault about him is his tendency to “chin,”</l>
<l n="47" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">When he's blethering on the progress of Japan!</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Great Japan!</l>
<l n="49" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Grand Japan!</l>
<l n="50" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Brave Japan!</l>
<l n="51" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Wise Japan!</l>
<l n="52" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Rich Japan!</l>
<l n="53" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Let's go there and cuddle O Mimosa San!</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e18236"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">The Missing Mean Man.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">I have read some forty dozen yarns like that of “Number One,”</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">About the tearful person who's been taken in and done!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">Yes, the chap that's badly treated, HE is always standing round:</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Where the dickens is the other, he that never can be found?</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">YOU have never met a party telling yarns like this, you see:</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">“I turned dog on poor old Johnson, who was very kind to me.”</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">No; the victim's always handy—he is always to be seen—</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">Where's the other blessed bounder, he who does the thing that's mean?</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e18267"><pb n="192" TEIform="pb" id="d64e18268"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Insomnia.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">He awoke with a start with his nerves all alive.</l>
<l n="2" part="N" TEIform="l">Was it Three? Was it Four? How he prayed it was Five!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">As he listened and waited the clock in the hall</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Gave one chime. “It is thirty past four after all!”</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">But his mind would n't rest and his pulse would n't fall,</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">And he listened and waited. The clock in the hall</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">Gave one chime! How he started and shivered again,</l>
<l n="8" part="N" TEIform="l">For the goddess of sleep had deserted his brain.</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">How silent the house and how gloomy it grew!</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">As he waited and listened—the hall clock chimed Two.</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">And he sighed that the seconds so lazily run</l>
<l n="12" part="N" TEIform="l">Till the hall clock again struck a leisurely “one.”</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">Half-past Two! He would read and not listen for Three,</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">But his thoughts would n't gather, his mind was n't free;</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">And he noted each sound and he marked every hum:</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">Had Time been suspended? Would Three NEVER come?</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">Yes, it came like a funeral slowly in gloom,</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">And the victim arose and paraded the room.</l>
<l n="19" part="N" TEIform="l">Half-past three! Was it possible time was so slow?</l>
<l n="20" part="N" TEIform="l">Still pacing and pacing the room to and fro.</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">Four o'clock! Then another wait longer than all</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">Till the chime of the half-hour was heard from the hall.</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">Five o'clock—a grey shade on the window was cast.</l>
<l n="24" part="N" TEIform="l">“Thank Heaven!” he cried, “it is daylight at last!”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e18349"><pb n="193" TEIform="pb" id="d64e18350"/><head type="div1" TEIform="head">A Tight Place.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">For a brief experimental,</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Mild and gentle,</l>
<l n="3" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Sort o' spree</l>
<l n="4" part="N" TEIform="l">Saltbush William was in Sydney</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">With some others of his kidney;</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">Every man an Ananias,</l>
<l n="7" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Seasoned liars,</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Conscience free!</l>
<l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">But the wily William wore his</l>
<l n="10" part="N" TEIform="l">Simple smile and told us stories</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Of the kind in which he glories,</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Same as me!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">“Now, you chaps are pretty gritty</l>
<l n="14" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">In the city,”</l>
<l n="15" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Murmured Bill.</l>
<l n="16" part="N" TEIform="l">“But you go to North Australia</l>
<l n="17" part="N" TEIform="l">And you'll find your courage fail yer;</l>
<l n="18" part="N" TEIform="l">You'll get scared the same as I did,</l>
<l n="19" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">That's provided</l>
<l n="20" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">There is still</l>
<l n="21" part="N" TEIform="l">That same tribe of fighting niggers:</l>
<l n="22" part="N" TEIform="l">Them as scared away the diggers</l>
<l n="23" part="N" TEIform="l">When they cocked their rifle triggers</l>
<l n="24" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Dead to kill.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="25" part="N" TEIform="l">“'T was them niggers cut the cable,</l>
<l n="26" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Sure as Abel</l>
<l n="27" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Murdered Cain!</l>
<pb n="194" TEIform="pb" id="d64e18440"/>
<l n="28" part="N" TEIform="l">Thought it was a kind of fencing</l>
<l n="29" part="N" TEIform="l">That the white man was commencing,</l>
<l n="30" part="N" TEIform="l">And as soon as it was mended</l>
<l n="31" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">They upended</l>
<l n="32" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">It again!</l>
<l n="33" part="N" TEIform="l">What d'ye say? 'T was Cain killed Abel?</l>
<l n="34" part="N" TEIform="l">Have yer way about the fable;</l>
<l n="35" part="N" TEIform="l">Still, them niggers cut the cable—</l>
<l n="36" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">That was plain.</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="37" part="N" TEIform="l">“Well, the Darwin line's important,</l>
<l n="38" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">And it ought n't</l>
<l n="39" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">To be snagged,</l>
<l n="40" part="N" TEIform="l">Or that blanky Kaiser's capers</l>
<l n="41" part="N" TEIform="l">Can't be printed in the papers!</l>
<l n="42" part="N" TEIform="l">And the Government, it figures</l>
<l n="43" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">That them niggers</l>
<l n="44" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Must be bagged;</l>
<l n="45" part="N" TEIform="l">So they send me out from Cooper's</l>
<l n="46" part="N" TEIform="l">Creek with five and twenty troopers;</l>
<l n="47" part="N" TEIform="l">If I ever see such supers</l>
<l n="48" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">I'll be lagged!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="49" part="N" TEIform="l">“First we camped at Charlotte Waters,</l>
<l n="50" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Fairish quarters</l>
<l n="51" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">In the main;</l>
<l n="52" part="N" TEIform="l">Then we crossed MacDonnell Ranges,</l>
<l n="53" part="N" TEIform="l">Where of course the country changes.</l>
<l n="54" part="N" TEIform="l">When we saw them niggers camping</l>
<l n="55" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">We was tramping</l>
<l n="56" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">'Cross the plain.</l>
<pb n="195" TEIform="pb" id="d64e18536"/>
<l n="57" part="N" TEIform="l">They was sort o' yellow colour,</l>
<l n="58" part="N" TEIform="l">Like the Chinese, only duller;</l>
<l n="59" part="N" TEIform="l">Thick as flies in Cunnamulla</l>
<l n="60" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">After rain!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="61" part="N" TEIform="l">“Well, at first they did n't spot us,</l>
<l n="62" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">But they got us</l>
<l n="63" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">In a bit.</l>
<l n="64" part="N" TEIform="l">And they came along a-yelling</l>
<l n="65" part="N" TEIform="l">In a way that beats the telling;</l>
<l n="66" part="N" TEIform="l">And you never heard such howling!</l>
<l n="67" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Trooper Dowling</l>
<l n="68" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Took a fit!</l>
<l n="69" part="N" TEIform="l">On they came, them savage whoopers,</l>
<l n="70" part="N" TEIform="l">And I calls upon the troopers,</l>
<l n="71" part="N" TEIform="l">But the crowd of scurvy supers</l>
<l n="72" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Turned and flit!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="73" part="N" TEIform="l">“They were city-bred and frightened;</l>
<l n="74" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">And I mightn't,</l>
<l n="75" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">If I'd known,</l>
<l n="76" part="N" TEIform="l">Ever ventured with the beggars</l>
<l n="77" part="N" TEIform="l">Out against them savage niggers,</l>
<l n="78" part="N" TEIform="l">For a kiddie could have cleft me</l>
<l n="79" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">When they left me</l>
<l n="80" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">All alone!</l>
<l n="81" part="N" TEIform="l">I ain't anxious to disgrace 'em,</l>
<l n="82" part="N" TEIform="l">But for <hi TEIform="hi">cows</hi> you could n't place 'em!</l>
<l n="83" part="N" TEIform="l">Fancy leaving me to face 'em</l>
<l n="84" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">On my own!”</l></lg>
<pb n="196" TEIform="pb" id="d64e18630"/>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="85" part="N" TEIform="l">“As it happened, I was saddled,</l>
<l n="86" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">And skedaddled</l>
<l n="87" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">You can bet!</l>
<l n="88" part="N" TEIform="l">With them niggers rushing after,</l>
<l n="89" part="N" TEIform="l">Full of howlin' shouts o' laughter.</l>
<l n="90" part="N" TEIform="l">And a thing that very strange is,</l>
<l n="91" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">In the ranges</l>
<l n="92" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">I was set!</l>
<l n="93" part="N" TEIform="l">And my confidence was shaken,</l>
<l n="94" part="N" TEIform="l">For, in hopes to save my bacon,</l>
<l n="95" part="N" TEIform="l">'<hi TEIform="hi">T was the wrong ravine I'd taken!</hi>”</l>
<l n="96" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">TALK OF SWEAT!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="97" part="N" TEIform="l">“Straight ahead of me a chasm,</l>
<l n="98" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Yawning chasm!</l>
<l n="99" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Thousand feet!!</l>
<l n="100" part="N" TEIform="l">On each side of me a mountain,</l>
<l n="101" part="N" TEIform="l">Just how high I was n't countin',</l>
<l n="102" part="N" TEIform="l">But completely perpendic'lar!</l>
<l n="103" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">'T was a tickler</l>
<l n="104" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">And</hi> a treat!</l>
<l n="105" part="N" TEIform="l">And them yelling fiends behind me;</l>
<l n="106" part="N" TEIform="l">Bound to catch me; sure to find me;</l>
<l n="107" part="N" TEIform="l">Could n't miss me! Well, you mind me</l>
<l n="108" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">It was sweet!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="109" part="N" TEIform="l">“On they came, a swarm—Great Cæsar!</l>
<l n="110" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Like the bees a-Round the comb.</l>
<l n="111" part="N" TEIform="l">Yelling! Howling! Screaming! Roaring!</l>
<l n="112" part="N" TEIform="l">I could feel the sweat a-pouring,</l>
<pb n="197" TEIform="pb" id="d64e18727"/>
<l n="113" part="N" TEIform="l">And the horse could go no farther,</l>
<l n="114" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Laved in lather,</l>
<l n="115" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l">Flaked in foam;</l>
<l n="116" part="N" TEIform="l">It was certain death—no ransom;</l>
<l n="117" part="N" TEIform="l">But I was n't game to chance 'em!</l>
<l n="118" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">So I whistled for a hansom</hi>,</l>
<l n="119" rend="indent3" part="N" TEIform="l"><hi TEIform="hi">And came home</hi>.”</l></lg>
</div1>
<div1 type="poem" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="div1" id="d64e18757"><head type="div1" TEIform="head">Finally.</head>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="1" part="N" TEIform="l">What's the good of a doleful tale?</l>
<l n="2" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Make the people laugh!</l>
<l n="3" part="N" TEIform="l">What's the use of a woeful wail?</l>
<l n="4" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Make the people laugh!</l>
<l n="5" part="N" TEIform="l">Ain't there misery enough</l>
<l n="6" part="N" TEIform="l">In this world we find so tough?</l>
<l n="7" part="N" TEIform="l">What's the good of the dismal stuff?</l>
<l n="8" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Make the people laugh!</l></lg>
<lg type="stanza" org="uniform" sample="complete" part="N" TEIform="lg"><l n="9" part="N" TEIform="l">That's my notion all the while—</l>
<l n="10" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Help the folk to laugh!</l>
<l n="11" part="N" TEIform="l">Lord! there's money in a smile!</l>
<l n="12" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Raise a ringing laugh!</l>
<l n="13" part="N" TEIform="l">What's the use to keep your nose</l>
<l n="14" part="N" TEIform="l">Snivelling o'er the worst o' woes?</l>
<l n="15" part="N" TEIform="l">Sorrow comes—but sorrow goes!</l>
<l n="16" rend="indent1" part="N" TEIform="l">Shake it off and laugh!</l></lg>
</div1>
</div0>
</body>
</text>
</TEI.2>

http://ns.ausnc.org.au/corpora/austlit/source/goohits#Raw